I know to some people this is probably a dumb question but i dont know how. I am very shy. I have trouble making friends because I will talk to them once (ex: about a test we just took or a sports game the previous night) but then i will never really talk to them again because i dont know what to say. any help?
2006-12-21 10:58:09 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Try simply asking people about themselves. "How are you?" "What have you been up to?" If they're wearing something nice, ask them where they go it. Or ask if they saw something on television,. or if you're at school, what they think of the teachers and the class.
When you feel nervous, you probably find that your mind goes blank, so take a deep breath... Focus on the other person and not your own shyness. Smile, and keep your arms open (not crossed over your body) - be attentive. These things help the other person feel at ease and more likely to want to talk to you.
Often joining a club or a team can help - you already have a shared interest so you have something to talk about.
Good luck!
2006-12-21 11:14:02 · answer #1 · answered by Helen B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ive got the same problem, im a very quiet person and a gal of few words so i rarely say much to people I dont know well. Youve got to plan ahead what you want to talk about. Basically, ask the questions you would like to be asked. Remember that most peoples favorite thing to talk about it themselves. Ask people how their weekend was, what new movies theyd like to see, hobbies, etc. and give them feedback. A conversation isnt something you can force, but once you get the natural flow of things it usually turns out okay. Dont be afraid of pauses, just move on to another subject. And if it makes you feel more comfortable, bring along a friend or two so you can have a group discussion. Talking to new people with people you already know is a lot easier than doing it on your own.
good luck!
2006-12-21 19:02:32 · answer #2 · answered by idbangrobertplant 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's very hard now a days to make any friends, everybody seems to be into their own, not like before when people were friendly in the streets. Now if you stare at them for so long they flip or flip you off. So my advice for you is to hang out where there are social groups for singles or couples.Try joining school groups involve yourself more in activities, look for what you like and go for it~I hope this helps.
2006-12-21 19:04:35 · answer #3 · answered by YO~NO~FUI E 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you have to learn to extend yourself a bit more..you are on the right track by starting a conversation..good going!!!!
for example, if there is someone you see all the time, like in class, then you should extend yourself by saying hey do you want to go for a beer, coffee or exchange class notes...and if they say yes then you can get their email or msn contact and take it from there....the worse that can happen is that they say no which either means they are busy (not your fault) or they arent interested which tells you something about their character and the fact that maybe being their friend wouldn't be the best thing for you
2006-12-21 19:01:14 · answer #4 · answered by Louisa C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi, You say you talk to them once and then you never really talk to them again, so I figure the problem you have is not starting the first conversation, but starting the next one. What you have to do to listen to people in your first conversation. Pay attention to anything they say about themselves, their likes/dislikes ect. Mostly you have to show interest in them. You will then find that they will be interested in you.
2006-12-21 19:16:36 · answer #5 · answered by justhelping 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next time you see someone sitting alone you should go up to them and give them some company ask them why they are alone. Then start to ask questions like whats your name, age, fave color, fave food. Get to know them.....go back the next day and sit with them....if you do this then they will be welcoming your freindlyness....all you have to do is be nice to them....be interested in them and listen to what they have to say. Who knows you might just make your bff so just go for it.
2006-12-21 19:05:47 · answer #6 · answered by thatonegirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i actually used to be really shy but im working on it! just think of any chance you feel like you could say something. it could end up being a whole conversation. and any time they talk to you, make sure to put in input and not just listen then not say anything.
good luck.
2006-12-21 19:02:47 · answer #7 · answered by cortni 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be your self dude talk to them about stuff you like and maybe if they have the same likes as you they you guys could end up pretty tight and try to funny as well but don't try so hard keep it natural
2006-12-21 19:09:45 · answer #8 · answered by Mcduck 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just pick a topic that you are comfortable talking about and that they might find interesting. like sports, food, shopping, etc.
2006-12-21 19:05:15 · answer #9 · answered by not a bad guy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him what kind of things he likes.. test last like a second but his hobbies will last much longer. I also think it shows that you really care about him
2006-12-21 19:02:23 · answer #10 · answered by StressedSweetie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋