My Baby Is Due February 8th....Im 16...Plz Read For The Story...?

Question

okso i was raped.....everything is fine and im healthy and so is my son....im keeping him. the 2 men who did this are in jail.he has NO visitation or anything...but being 16 im scared.i was 15 when it happend.but idk how to prepare...im basically by myself because my parents think i was just having sex and im using this as an excuse..they never even came to my court hearings.but anywayz im working 2 jobs AND going to school for only 2 more weeks.im doing all i can...but if u have any advice what-so-ever...plz tell me.id really appreciate it

thank you

Answer 1

honey...i commend you for being as brave as you are. if you ever need any advice just drop me a line i just had a baby 7 months ago i am 19 and did have the support of my family but i am willing to help any way i can my email is [e-mail]. i am really not sure what to say to prepare you for motherhood i just am going to tell you that it is hard but well worth it. you might check in your town to see if they have a single mothers support group. it will really help i meet w/ a parent counselor once a month and it is very helpful and resourceful. best of luck to you sweetie

Answer 2

First I want to say, you inspire me. To go through what you did takes a strong woman. I am sorry that you have been forced into this situation. I will say, though, that every minute you have with your little boy, will be worth every second that you had to struggle. This baby is a gift and I am so happy to hear you will keep the child.
It will be hard, especially since you do not have the support of your family. Fortunately, there are different avenues that you can take. Social services in your town will assist in finding housing, fuel assistance, food and just about any other thing you could need. contact them and make sure you tap those resources as soon as you can. Also there are mothers groups every where and every type. You could find one for young moms.
There is no way to prepare for motherhood. Even if you read all the books and go to all the classes, when you bring your baby home you will feel like you were slapped in the face.
Just take it one day at a time. Don't stress if you didn't take a shower...you can do it tomorrow. Don't get mad if the baby throws up in your hair...it's actually kind of funny....you won't think this at 3 am....but it is later. there is a limitless amount of advice I could give so first I will tell you not to drop out of school. No matter how hard it gets that is the one thing you will need most. Your education will be your most valuable asset in the long run.
And last I will say. Love that baby with your whole being. He will return it ten fold. Tell him everyday.
Good luck. if you would like to talk feel free to e-mail me at [e-mail].

Answer 3

I don't _enjoy_ reading them, and I don't go out of my way to do so, but when I do I always feel grateful. Grateful that my husband and son are alive and well, and grateful that I have no one in my life who would harm my child. Good can come out of them too.I've had stories like that just put me in a sad mood all day, but then I have to look at my son and snuggle him to death. I find that after reading something horrible, I'm more thankful for what I have. I mean...why am I worrying so much about the fact that we're dirt poor when I have the most beautiful little boy? I think for people that read them all the time are like the people who slow down when driving by an accident on the highway. Morbid curiosity. I also think a lot of people feel the need to acknowledge these people somehow...which I understand.

Answer 4

However it happened - it is too late to go back in time and have any regrets - we need to live and learn regardless of how difficult the learning process is., what you need to do now is focus on yourself and trying to provide for your son - have his clothing, bottles, etc., ready for his arrival. Also, hopefully your parents could come around and support you and help you out with him in order for you to continue your education and provide financially for your child. What you need NOT to do is start going out and act irresponsibly, you need to show your parents and everyone else including yourself and your baby that despite your age, you are now a "mother" and not just a mother because you gave birth to this child, but because you play the role of a real mother, being there for your child and providing him with everything possible and always putting him first. Once your parents and everyone see that you are taking responsibility, I think that they will start respecting you as their child and as an adult, remember, age is just a number - what really matters is what age you "act", because there are women that are 30 and act like they are 18 - just your case is the opposite, you are 16 and are to act 30. Never give up, always remember, that as long as you stay positive and not give in to loneliness and or any obstacle that comes your way - you and your baby will be fine. I had my daughter at 17 and with my parents help, babysitting I finished college and I am now a paralegal, live in a beautiful house and my daughter is 13. Therefore, you could do the same, I never said that it would be easy, but if you managed to overcome the trauma of being raped, then you can overcome anything that life puts your way!!! Good Luck...

Answer 5

Stay in school, homeschool, take your homeschooling online, or your school online.

I was raped had the baby when I was 13. By 15 I had my own apartment, paid all of the bills, and took care of my kid on my own. Haven't saw my foster parents since then, then again thats prolly just because since they weren't getting a check for me they didn't care. lol

Since your parents don't believe you just be ready to ignore them if/when they say anything negative.

I graduated HS when I was 17, got a 2 year degree and I am still in school. I'm 20 now so much older than the 12 when I got pregnant. If I could do it when I was 13 I'm sure you can do it at 16.

Keep your head up, ignore stupid people, don't be ashamed to get the kids furniture and all of that at a second hand shop for kids it would save a lot of money and you can spend more time with him.

Answer 6

with strong motives and good will-power, you will be ok. there is help out there that you can use and make the best life you possibly can for you and your baby. it sounds like you have those 2 things. being a young mother myself, i will tell you, it is very possible. i'm sorry to hear about how things came to be this way but theres lots of room for strong independant women out here in the world. keep your head up and keep a strong backbone. good luck with things. your family will either have to get over it and accept the situation or they might not be wirth the struggle. Merry Christmas

Answer 7

you should be proud of yourself and one day your child will be too i have a friend who was raped in college and got pregnant she kept her daughter who is now six the person who did it is in prison she is now married and is going back to college after dropping out when this happened things would have been a lot easier for her if she had finished school but at the time she felt she could not so please stay in school and your parents should be ashamed for acting so selfish i know if it was my child no matter if they were out having sex on purpose or if they got raped i could not turn my back on them good luck and god bless you

Answer 8

there are a lot of mother baby groups you can get into. there are violent crime groups as well. I'm sure with a new baby it'll be a while before you're ready to go out and do things other than take baby to the hospital and yourself. wait until after you're healthy to go to the groups. ask for help, and never turn down help!!! I'm sorry this happened to you, god bless little sister.

ooh yeah also thrift stores can be a working mothers best friend.
Emmy

Answer 9

i think u are doing really great, i was 14 with my first adn 17 this time and ive been through what ur going through. my parents believed me thats the main difference, they helped me alot. but my only advice to you is to keep up what ur doing. are u living with ur parents still? if ur going to have trouble because of money, go ahead and talk to ur local dhs office about what to do. i hope u have ur things u need. if not, go to freecycle.org, and sign up for a local group near where u live, u can get the things u will need for the baby. and if ur worried about income, like i said, talk to ur local dhs office and they can get u some help with this.

Answer 10

I feel so terrible for you! There are places that can give you the help you need. Contact your county's Job and Family Services. They can help you with medical, food, and babysitting along with other services. Hang in there hun. That baby is lucky to have you.