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If someone has cheated, can they truly repent?

2006-12-21 08:50:11 · 38 answers · asked by Layla 2 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

38 answers

It's like any addiction or certain type of behaviour, it depends on the person. I have seen people change when they finally met the partner they were truly happy with, it was their decision and they changed for the better. To be honest with you, I am an optimist and hope always for the better, give people a chance and see what happens. We all make mistakes, no one is perfect.
Good Luck

2006-12-21 08:59:39 · answer #1 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 1 0

No I do not think that at all. People can change, but not overnight. It takes a long time and a great deal of personal growth. Usually not fast enough for the relationship that has been damaged to heal back together.

If someone cheats on their BF/GF when their 16 and then later finds the right man/woman to marry when they are in their 30's. Does that mean that since they cheated when they were a teenager they are now and forever a cheater? No, it is dependent on what he/she has been doing since then.

People grow. People change. Just not very quickly.

2006-12-21 09:09:37 · answer #2 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0 0

I think so - when I was younger I cheated on many of my gf's.

I also cheated on a woman I was living with (we were together like 6 years).

However, my last relationship of five years, I never cheated... and never looked for someone to cheat with... ironically she did cheat early in the relationship... and I suspect she was cheating at the end... of course she's married now...

So no, I don't think once a cheat always a cheat... I think we can be reformed.

But I will admit that once one has cheated, its much easier to cheat again.

-dh

2006-12-21 08:56:09 · answer #3 · answered by delicateharmony 5 · 1 0

I agree with the "once a cheat, always a cheat" theory when it's the same relationship. Once you have broken that trust with the person you were involved with, it is very hard to fix it. However, I think that if the person cheated with another person and then now is with you, you can lay the ground work to ensure that person does not cheat.

2006-12-21 09:02:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

I believe that....if they cheat once, then they can do it again...remember, the first time is the hardest and if they get away with it then probably they will cheat again....

Some might repent, but i find it quite unlikely because if they cheated in the first place, then you were not the most important person for them....

Remember, nothing justifies cheating....and even if they did repent, will you be able to trust them again??? They need to earn your trust back...which is very difficult because you might not be able to trust them fully once again...

2006-12-21 08:57:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

The thing is that if they have cheated then they HAVE the mental reasoning skill to thin they are more important than the marriage. Its all about them kind of attitude.

They may "repent" cheating, but NOT the thinking that allowed them to justify it to themselves.

2006-12-21 09:06:04 · answer #6 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0 0

They can repent, but they seldom do. The line between fidelity and infidelity is soley mental. Once you've crossed it, it's hard to convince yourself that anything worse would happen to you the second time.

What's actually important, is that the whoever cheated put themselves before their partner. Oftentimes that behaviour is chronic. Look for other signs of selfishness, and decide whether it's time to bail. Usually it is.

2006-12-21 08:55:52 · answer #7 · answered by Beardog 7 · 0 0

They can repent all they want to, but the fact remains that they cheated. It would take a long time to build up trust again!

2006-12-21 08:53:03 · answer #8 · answered by AnnieD 4 · 0 0

No! People change. If you believe something to be true in it's situation, then it is true in it's consequence...so a person who once cheated now wants to change CAN, if they believe that they aren't cheaters and that they are beyond that dishonor! So it's more of a psychological thing, not a phsyical one. People who want peace of mind won't cheat anymore!

2006-12-21 08:56:26 · answer #9 · answered by Crazed Chica 2 · 0 0

The reason for this, and all other over-generalizations, is because it is usually true. However, it is certainly not always true that cheaters repeat. Some people do recognize the error of their ways and do repent. They are fewer in number than those who habitually give in to temptation, but they do exist.

2006-12-21 08:53:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

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