My boyfriend of almost 6 years got infatuated with an older woman when on a trip abroad, came home and broke up with me. It's been over a month and I'm learning to live again, taking baby steps. He's really infatuated with her and is developing the relationship, although it has no future. He can't see it right now, it is only a matter of time before it hits him.
I just need some advice on how do you get over the pain and how do you pick yourself up again and move on to something better? I have found an apartment for myself already. I don't have a lot of friends here since I moved from another country 2 years ago.
And for some stupid reason I want him to realize at some point what mistake he'd made.
2006-12-21 07:47:27 · 6 answers · asked by moonylola 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
He will realize that it's a mistake and he threw away a good relationship, but he has to come to that realization on his own, nothing you say or do will "make" him see it. Try not to isolate yourself, get out and be around people, it will get easier over time. I know what you are feeling, and it's ok to mourn, to cry, just don't let it overwhelm you. Good luck, honey.
2006-12-21 07:54:16 · answer #1 · answered by mightymite1957 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way he will realize it is a mistake is if you stay calm, sweet and pleasant and the new relationship goes sour....this takes a lot of waiting and after all, do you really want someone who will drop you for someone else? I think you are doing all the right things, you've found a new place to live, put all your energy into that new place for now....paint, spend hours in the drapery department looking at fabrics, decide what you are going to put where and figure out how to make that new bathroom of yours your own personal SPA experience.....make sure you have some type of social support system, church, social group, something that allows you contact with other people. It's hard to get over hurt, and sometimes the only thing that heals the hurt is the passage of time. Realize that you will have 'good' days and 'bad' days while you are trying to get over this. Concentrate on yourself, improve a skill, take a class, pick something that forces you to engage with other people. There is this restaurant in Chicago that is 50s style and when you walk into the ladies bathroom, above the mirror is painted in huge letters,' YOU'RE TOO GOOD FOR HIM...." I laugh every time I walk into that bathroom! Try to keep your sense of humor and this too shall pass....
2006-12-21 07:58:34 · answer #2 · answered by XOXOXOXO 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is an opportunity for you to lose your shyness and get involved with a community group (i.e., theater, church,athletics). Loss of a boyfriend to another woman has happened to alot of women, including me, and I can tell you that this is the opportunity to just go out there and become friends with someone you admire or even finding your own talents by being involved with a hobby -- (I plan to do some digital photography during the upcoming holidays). Think of this time as an opportunity for you to grow and to forget about your boyfriend. You've already taken the step to pick yourself up by posting your question and asking for help in finding answers appropriate for your situation.
2006-12-21 07:55:45 · answer #3 · answered by Jo K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you were born, it was without him, you grew up without him, and now you mean you can't live without him?
The first thing you need to realize it what you are worth, I'm very positive you are a great person, and don't load yourself with things that may cripple you in the long run, as for friends, keep ypur eyes open, great friendships are comming your way, not that I can "see it" I just know it, it can't be in any other way. there is a lot of wonderful people around you, you just don't know it yet. As fir your boyfriend, if he doesn't stay with you, he doesn't deserve you. Take care and God Bless you.
2006-12-21 07:54:54 · answer #4 · answered by skydiver 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry hun. Hopefully he comes to his senses soon. However if it happens make it clear to him you won't get walked all over by him.
Just realize all the good things you have going in your life. Make new friends with similar interests. Internet is good for that....just be careful. Keep yourself busy so time goes by fast.
I hope everything works out for the best. Good luck.
2006-12-21 07:54:30 · answer #5 · answered by Jenny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he will realize it when you are gone.
dialog, meet new friends, start a new hobby, have confidence that life will begin again, good luck!!!!
2006-12-21 07:55:18 · answer #6 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋