Well we talked about having another baby and decided that would would take it in three month spurts like try for three months and then take a break for a month or so we are in no big hurry to have another baby right now, but we would like to have another one. Well this month would make the marker for the last month of actively trying and then January would be our breaking period well we talked yesterday and he is seeming real down about alot of things, the house we were going to get he has now changed his mind about it and has decided he wants to wait longer to have another baby. I am very supportive on the whole house and waiting to have another baby thing b/c i feel when it is time we will have another one, but the thing is I think I might be pregnant this month and I don't know how he will take it if I am pregnant. It would have happened very quickly and honestly I am now thinking I wished I would have waited until we got our house (which we are still talking about getting this one
2006-12-21 06:03:23 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
that we are looking at) We are financially stable and have no worries about money right now so that is not the issue. The thing is he lets other people influence him on decisions WE as a couple should be making that is why he had a change of heart about the house we both LOVED and now I am wondering if someone else had an influence on him about having another baby. Either way i just need help on what to do in case I am pregnant, I don't want him to resent the baby because he changed his mind about being ready for another. how do i help him cope with whatever is bothering him right now.
2006-12-21 06:05:12 · update #1
If this is your second child, then you know that throughout the pregnancy you have hormanal emotional changes & he can feel them too. If you are pregnant, then rejoice. There maybe times where you both get very anxious about having a child but there will also be those wonderful moments. Life is like a wave. You have to ride it out to get on solid land but the ride there can be shakey. Just hold on and know that you are there together.
If you are not pregnant, then wait until you are both ready for sure. If you both agree on having a child, then wait one more month & then if you still feel the need to get pregnant, then try.
Good luck!
2006-12-21 06:14:41 · answer #1 · answered by staxi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, find out for certain if you are pregnant. If not, you need to talk to your husband and find out what is going on with him. You said "another baby". So, it isn't like his has doubts about being a dad. He has one child already and knows what it is like. He is an adult, your husband, the father of your child. You have to tell him if you ARE pregnant. It shouldn't be a shock since you were trying. If he is not happy he has a lot of explaining to do. Is he just stressed from work? Does he not want to be married? Is he having an affair? Don't ask him these things until you find out his reaction to the pregnancy. He may just be overwhelmed at the thought of getting a new house and new baby. Good Luck.
2006-12-21 06:18:45 · answer #2 · answered by dkwkbmn 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This may not be that helpful, but it sounds to me like if you're pregnant then you're having a baby. Unless of course you're going to be one of those people who has an abortion because the child doesn't fit in your schedule? As far as your husband, it's not something he can just decide he doesn't want now. I mean it's like I said if you're having a baby, he's having a baby. Things will work out as they should regardless, so I'd say, find out if you're pregnant, decide what you're willing to live with and want to do as a couple, then quite worrying about things that you have absolutely no control over (like not getting the house). You can't convince him to want the child, you just have to do what you know is right. And it might be cruel to say, but a house is a house is a house, it just matters what you make it.
2006-12-21 06:15:05 · answer #3 · answered by Seg 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think if you are pregnant, he will be fine with it. Sounds like he is just freaking out a little about things.
You should talk to him. Ask him why he doesn't want the house now, and what's going through his head. Tell him that you're nervous about being pregnant now, and what he would think. Maybe he just needs a little time- or he is just testing the waters to see what you think about waiting.
If he has been down for more than 2 weeks, he might be suffering from depression.
Good luck! I think talking to him would help a lot.
2006-12-21 06:11:51 · answer #4 · answered by Simply_Renee 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
wow that is quite the situation. well hun i think the best thing you can do is #1 find out if you are pregnant for sure. #2 sit him down and talk to him and tell him that you think you might be or that you are. and if you are then you two will make wonderful parents (again) he will eventually come around and things will work out for the best. if you arent then you can still wait, like you said you have plenty of time to have children and if you want to get a house and make a nice home to raise another child in then that is great. either way i think you need to sit him down again and talk to him and find out what exactly is bothering him, and that way you two are both on the same page when it comes to knowing when the right time to have another baby is, and if that time is now then great, remember things happen for a reason and if you are pregnant now, then it was meant to be and things will work themselves out. good luck to the both of you and i hope you figure things out together. happy holidays.
and if you are pregnant...congrats!
2006-12-21 06:10:31 · answer #5 · answered by puppy love 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are pregnant it happened when you both agreed you wanted another baby. Your husband should not resent you or the baby he wanting it as well. Everything happens for a reason. Good luck.
2006-12-21 06:11:33 · answer #6 · answered by Weiners and Beans 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think he will resent the baby! you both made the decision for another and that hasn't changed it might just be sooner than you would both ideally like. he will be fine and will be happy if you are expecting your second. don't stress, it will all be okay it always is, people make do in all sorts of situations. It will work out.
good luck .
2006-12-21 06:10:23 · answer #7 · answered by mum 2 Cameron and Ewan 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well you are right the two of you should make the decision and not let other people influence you? I think if you are having a baby you should tell him right away and deal with it together
2006-12-21 06:10:22 · answer #8 · answered by Maggie Muggins 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just relax, everything has a way of working out, If you are pregnant be happy even if your housing situation is "up in the air" , you are going to have 9 months of sorting things out.
2006-12-21 06:11:42 · answer #9 · answered by Jody 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it is normal to have "cold feet" adding another baby to the mix is scary.....for the man or woman.
men have to "provide" for all the mouths in the house...their medical, school, clothes...etc....and that can freak a man out completely and totally!!!!
find out for sure.....and tell him in a fun way....not like "honey you are going to just fall over and die" way....but make it fun and cute and exciting....but be ready in case he doesn't jump to his feet shouting "horrary"...you already know his concerns and fears.....so it might take awhile to sink in....or it might not. don't be disappointed in his reaction in other words...you are already aware of his position and fears!!
tell him as soon as you find out for sure..don't wait too long.....and assure him that it is ok and a baby is a true blessing. it will all work it out!!!!!!!!!!! good luck!!!
2006-12-21 06:14:55 · answer #10 · answered by candy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋