My bf abused me in june coz he saw me dancing with another guy. He broke up n told me im a cheap gurl along with abuses . then he stopped contacting me. But after a month he started contacting through text mesgs.Again not very pleasant mesgs. but now on 14th nov he again abused me as he kept asking me through text mesgs if i had gone on a date with another guy. But i kept silent and he again abused me through mesgs tht im a prosti**te. He told me he wants to slap me n abuse me .When 2 mesgs were sent by chance to him by me,He abused me n mesgd tht if another mesg i send...he will break my hands n abused me.I replied tht im very much scared of him n to keep away from me .He considers me to be a very cheap gurl whereas i was with my parents when he thought me to be dating with some guy as his friends told him so.He only trusts his friends n they keep telling him im bad.NOW HE SENT 2 MESGS ON 2DEC.I MESG-HOW'S UR BF?2-I MAY B SILENT BT DEEP IN MY HEART I MISS U.NOW HE SENT 3 MESGS ON MY..
2006-12-21 04:44:02 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
MY BIRTHDAY, A VERY FORMAL MESG "HAPPY BIRHTDAY". THEN I CALLED HIM TO THANK HIM N HE HAD A FORMAL TALK N I HEARD HIS FRIENZ CALLING HIM N HE SAID E WILL TALK LATER. THEN AT 12AM AT NITE HE AGAIN MESGD HAPPY BDE. NEXT DAY I MESGD AROUND 2 NOON"THANX FOR UR WISHES N HAV A NICE DAY". BUT THE MESG WASNT SENT SO I SENT IT AGAIN. HE MESGD THT WAT IS THE NEED TO SEND SAME MESG AGAIN. I MESGD THT HTERE IS SOME PROB IN MY CELL N IM SORRY N CATCH U LATER. HE MESGD THT-"NO NO NO. THERE'S NO NEED TO CATCH ME AGAIN". I WANA KNOW Y HE MESGD ME THEN??? N WHY HE BECAME SO RUDE N SENT ME SUCH A MESG??? WILL HE EVER CONTACT ME AGAIN COZ I REALLY LOVE HIM . IM CRYING SINCE THT DAY. PLZZZ TELL ME WILL HE EVER CONTACT ME AGAIN?? WHAT SHOULD I DO???
2006-12-21 04:44:21 · update #1
It sounds like you are suffering from co-dependency. There may be a part of him that feels that he too loves you but I do not think it is love but rather cathexis which is more like obsession but feels like love. For me sex and the feelings of love are often intertwined. If he has been broken up with you for some time he might not be having as much sex giving time for certain hormones to built up and enable him to have feelings of love but that really is obsession.
In my opinion you would do well not only to stay away from him but to get psychological counseling and or read books about co-dependency. You probably do not have a great sense of self worth. To combat this among other things you must love yourself by affirming that you are worthy of everything good. Watch the words you use in relation to yourself and you might be very surprised. This is the first step to recovery from years of self abuse. It is only natural that you are attracted to abusive men because it only affirms the image that you currently see of yourself.
Try also talking to a good friend and only relative who can encourage and help protect you from such situations in the future.
If things get bad enough with you ex get the police involved with a restraining order. Any threats of physical violence is against the law. If your ex texts these threats to you save them and show the police.
I sincerely wish you the best and am sorry you are in pain.
2006-12-21 05:21:00 · answer #1 · answered by Love of Truth 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know it feels like you love him now. He does not love you though. If he loved you, he would never put his hands on you. One day, he could really hurt or kill you. Please don't go back to him. You are hurting inside and that's expected. If you go back to him, you are telling him that it is ok to abuse you. You will find someone who truly loves you. It will just take time. Keep yourself busy with your friends and don't return any of his messages at all. If you can block his number, do it. Spend time with your family or join an organization of your interest. Do everything you can to keep your mind off of him. Stay busy and time will heal your hurt. Good Luck and Best Wishes.
2006-12-21 04:55:03 · answer #2 · answered by floridagirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't contact him under any circumstanses. Save the messages and show the police. Get a restraining order. A restraining order means he will go to jail just for contacting you.
2006-12-21 04:48:54 · answer #3 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are on here asking perfect strangers to solve your personal problems you know there is not one thing right with this "relationship" you speak of.
Take a walk and do not look back.
2006-12-21 05:04:54 · answer #4 · answered by hjfr27 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you seem to be the epitome of the sacrificial lamb and on top of it a little bit stupid. break all ties with this asshole, go to the police and get a restrain order if he goes on with that crap..
2006-12-21 04:54:24 · answer #5 · answered by Mimi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should learn how to love yourself so you do not depend upon attention from abusive jerks.
2006-12-21 04:48:34 · answer #6 · answered by inkantra 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
grow up. abuse happens in person, not in a message. sticks and stones may break your bones but names will never hurt me.
2006-12-21 04:49:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to cut all ties with this guy. It's that simple.
2006-12-21 04:48:05 · answer #8 · answered by bmbg2577 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋