Why do people who separate from their spouses start doing things they said they would never do and/or start seeing people who are the total opposite of their ex-spouse? I am not talking about doing things that they always wanted to do but doing things that they said they would never do because they hate it. Also, why do they get involved with people they have absolutely nothing in common with, for example, they are much younger, in different stage of life, into different things? Do we all go a little crazy or are we trying to prove something to ourselves and the rest of the world? Or maybe just our ex-spouse?
2006-12-21 02:39:44 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
To get back at ex could be alot of it. Alot of it could be they are trying to find themselves again. Maybe even to prove to themselves that they are still attractive or a good catch.
As far as messing around with someone opposite of the ex; that's an easy one. Because most 2nd, 3rd & 4th divorces are because most people are attracted to the same type person. If a marriage doesn't work out with #1 type person, why would the 2nd & 3rd marriage work out? So, they go for the different type person; usually one they are not really attracted to actually. My first marriage didn't work out; so the second time I married a knock out energetic girl, totally different than my first wife. Actually she was one that was way out of my league in physic and looks. Beautiful in everyway, but was selfish, self centered and very obnoxious person after a while. Well, that ended in disaster pretty quickly. I look back now and realize that I should of known better and shouldn't of done it. I think I was just trying to prove to myself what I was capable of. Valuable lesson that cost me alot of money; and probably alot of respect.
2006-12-21 03:01:02 · answer #1 · answered by Wondrin Dude 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps it is a little retaliation towards their spouse, if its the opposite of what they would normally do. Perhaps its the person trying to find themselves again. After being in a relationship for a long time, we seem to fall together and take on each others traits. When that relationship is over, we seem to realize that we have lost ourselves over the years. The new single life is the perfect time to try and find that person once more. Maybe we dont even know who that person is if the relationship we were in has been for many years. It could be a little crazy, and out of the norm for some ppl. When having a break-up like that im sure that some ppl feel that they have lost a part of themselves, and r now looking for something/someone to fill that empty spot. I think over time things will probably settle back down to where they r comfortable. But at the beginning its a new world for the divorcee's. Good luck!
2006-12-21 02:48:09 · answer #2 · answered by snowbunny67ss 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe it is rebellion from their old life. I myself divorced and found a man totally opposite from my ex. I am not constantly reminded of him because I moved on with someone that has different veiws and interests. I dont think I am crazy. Maybe we aren't able to explore life as we wished in the back of our minds but were too afraid to express before with the old relationship. Now we feel free to experience things never experienced before. Besides, it is good to mix it up. After all opposites do attract
2006-12-21 02:50:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say its no longer viable to reside in combination... are those disorders ones that would be helped by way of counceling? I real think that each one married couples (who do not desire to divorce however believe they have got no different alternative) must a minimum of make a entire hearted strive at counceling...it quite has helped hundreds of thousands of marriages. I'm the kind who nonetheless believes in til loss of life do us side.... nonetheless, in case your husband refuses to regard you good, and refuses to difference that remedy or admit a trouble, then its actually dangerous for you & your wellbeing to stick there. If you're depressed, that's a well ample cause to go away. Maybe no longer divorce, possibly simply separate? This will permit you to get a manage at the melancholy, that allows you to make it less complicated for you to be aware of the wedding....and it'll permit him to look how existence is with out you? It might also permit for you 2 to take into account counceling. Be powerful, handle your self!!
2016-09-03 17:45:53 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmm... maybe they just hated the way they were living before & want to try something new & different, hoping it will be better.
i never thought of it before, but i guess i did the same thing when i got seperated--started dating someone 11 yrs younger than my ex that was the complete opposite in nearly every way. seemed to work out well, i married him & am much happier!
2006-12-21 02:46:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends, if they've been together with the last person for a long time, then it might be because they want to try something different, or they just want to see what's out there...if they married young, it might be because they don't know exactly what they want right now, and would like options......
2006-12-21 02:46:00 · answer #6 · answered by shoppingdiva 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes it is revenge, sometimes it is just being someone else for awhile. When you lose someone you can tend to go a little crazy. You want to shut down and forget, or go out and show them you aren't hurt.Or lying around home waiting for them to come back.
2006-12-21 02:45:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When people are married they some times lose themselves. They see themselves only as half of a couple so when the couple is not longer together they have to re-discover who they are.
2006-12-21 02:43:48 · answer #8 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not all divorced people do the things you describe, but I would hazard a guess that people do learn from experiences and bad marriages.
2006-12-21 02:43:21 · answer #9 · answered by ghostwriter 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
simple. because they are lonley.
http://www.greendoorgifts.com/
2006-12-21 02:44:04 · answer #10 · answered by bradystjames 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋