Separated 3 months. Nothing is changing. No issues resolved. Still seeing each other and getting along. Still doesn't look were getting any closer to reconciliation and living together again. How long should we wait until deciding to keep going like this or give it up? One major problem is, we are still in love.
(she struggles with self esteen and depression & will not seek help with it)
2006-12-21 02:29:50 · 9 answers · asked by Wondrin Dude 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If it were me in this situation, I would NOT think of it in terms of a timetable. Things aren't going to happen on any sort of a schedule, and there is no way to know how long it will take until you both are ready to move forward with the marriage.
If she has problems and is not willing to seek professional help, I don't think that's a good sign. She has to be willing to do whatever it takes, just as you do, too.
This may be something that you cannot help her with, and you cannot rush her recovering from this. Give her space, and give her time. She will come around when she's ready - and if that happens too late for you, then so be it. Maybe it wasn't meant to be.
2006-12-21 02:38:24 · answer #1 · answered by Heather C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's the question...
Do you have kids together?
If yes, then you keep trying.
If no, end it after the holidays.
Here's the deal, the self esteem thing... shes female, we all do to some extent.
The depression thing, sorry, that's a chemical imbalance. It might get better on it's own, but chances are it will continue to get bad.
If she isn't willing to change, then she's not willing to try to improve things.
I still love my ex-husband, but he wasn't interested in improving the situation, so I (painfully) left.
Good luck, it's a hard time, especially this time of year.
2006-12-21 11:04:12 · answer #2 · answered by my-kids-mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cannot help someone who will not help themself. It is very painful to watch someone you love in depression. I know. If you are a man of faith, I would say pray... and keep on praying for her and for the resolve to your problem. Giving up is just too sad.
2006-12-21 10:35:55 · answer #3 · answered by sassinya 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to deal with what is going on in here head and heart right now. You love her and want to be with her and there is nothing wrong with that, but when you love someone then you need to do what is best for them and their well being. She knows that you are there for her and would do anything for her and with her knowing that you need to let her go. Not because you want to but because it is best for her. Just give her that space and time.
2006-12-21 10:42:14 · answer #4 · answered by LaReyna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am currently married, but can honestly say I'm not in love. If you have that, you should be able to get past anything. Dig deeper, let her know what you want and what you have to give. Ask yourself if she's worth waiting for and working for.
2006-12-21 10:34:12 · answer #5 · answered by brevly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait it out alittle longer. 3 months is nothin. If she won't seek help do what you can to show her your there for her.
2006-12-21 10:47:20 · answer #6 · answered by Jenny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your suffering from lowered expectations. Aim higher Dude, you can do a lot better.
2006-12-21 10:32:44 · answer #7 · answered by Rowdy Yayhoot 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u really love her try to get her help and then ask her straightfforward.
2006-12-21 10:33:10 · answer #8 · answered by crzysworkboy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you love her? If so then you NEVER give up...
2006-12-21 10:34:42 · answer #9 · answered by lee911 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋