it happens often to me, that I feel very attracted to straight men. Currently I am unhappily in love with a very nice co-worker (which says to be absolutely straight).
I am wondering if anybody knows a potential psychological reason behind that.
2006-12-19 23:58:16 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I think the answer is pretty simple. Straight men are usually not burdened with their sexuality from society like gay men are, and that enables them to be themselves more and thus appear sexier, since confidence = sexy. Many gay men simply don't have that, they still worry too much what other people think about them as they've been discriminated against.
Also it could be a little bit of the fact that the unavailability is making him even hotter. (ie we always want what we can't have) Like, the more unreachable something is the more we tend to want it.
Remember though, it's your mind playing tricks on you. If this guy is straight, he's no good for you because having sex with a straight guy is a complete one-way street. They will NOT return the favors. You will have to do ALL the work in the relationship. It is not fair to you, at all. There's a reason you said 'unhappily' in love. Obviously, your love can only be consummnated fully with another gay man who is able to share mutual attraction with you. You'll find him though. There are plenty of gay men to fit your personal niche, since I agree the mainstream gay society doesn't have a lot of sex appeal. =/
You have to understand though another reason gay men can ironically appear unattractive to other gay men, is that they're portrayed a certain way to make straight people feel more comfortable. The feminine, non-sexual gay man that designs your living room isn't perceived to threaten the archetypical 'straight guy' who is dominant, proud, and aggressive of his sexuality and power. In society's minds, everybody's wins.
One problem though: IT'S COMPLETE BULLSHIT. Because obviously, we are attracted to MASCULINITY. And society always tries to act like that's something only straight men are supposed to have.
2006-12-20 00:33:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's a fact of life, dearie. Straight girls always find gay guys the cutest. Sucks, doesn't it? Being helpful in an answer goes against my principles, but there's a first time for everything. Just hang out in LGBT communities more often. Y'know, a dating site or a gay bar or something.
2016-03-13 08:51:32 · answer #2 · answered by Karin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People always desire what they can't have. Being gay/straight doesn't really have anything to do with it. I seem to remember hearing that from one of my Psych professors in college. Of course everything effects different people differently, but I do not believe there is any "you have a condition" stuff involved with that, but rather just human nature. It's a curse we all have at some level, I just think it affects some people more than others.
I have several friends that are only attracted/fall in love with taken individuals. Just try not to mule over it too much... love happens when you least expect it.
2006-12-20 00:05:56 · answer #3 · answered by dcVixen 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hy hons gay boyfriends daviie and steeviie here- gay porno stars and nude waiters gay mens bar restaurants and-- male strippers. okay first rule with us- and we advise our other gay friends-- never ever go near a straight man- bad - a- move why?/ nine times out of ten a straight man wil dump another gay guy for womenn-- we have sen it happen to many times in our young lives both of us are 21 and 22, and-- we strongly advise leaving straights alone-- you are playing with fire. if your truly gay why in the hell are you running around with totally straight men-- dont tel us you cant attract another true gay man. its your fault your life is screwed up-- straight guys will use you and dump you. if you have any good sense, find a total-- gay man- you can do itt. you are goona just kep on getting hurt-- straight men are experminting and just screwing with your head-- think with your head - not the one downe below. we are a gay couple but have ben hit up on straight men-- and leave them alone.
2006-12-20 00:21:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it has anything to do with a person's gender preference. We ALL fall in love with people who are not available to us! Straight, gay or somewhere in between. It's just the general search for someone compatible.
2006-12-20 00:00:54 · answer #5 · answered by SlapHappy 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
One question that immediately comes to mind is, what kind of gay men do you know and how do they act?
If the answer is that they mostly act femme then the answer to your question might be that you are attracted to masculine men. There are plenty of masculine gays out there but you need to turn your gaydar up a bit.
If this is not the case then it might be the forbidden fruit syndrome. Lusting for that which you can never get.
Good luck on your journey!
2006-12-20 00:19:01 · answer #6 · answered by Tegarst 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
To me straight men are sexy, but that is on a personal view.
Life can't be wasted on something u can't have!!!!!! So take it, take what u can have and want, and live.
U wouldn't be asking these questions if u had cancer. So deal with life, cause u only have 1!!!!!!!!
2006-12-20 01:16:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
From a Psych 101 viewpoint, you become attracted to unavailable guys because (although you may not know it) you can't commit to anyone yet.
2006-12-20 00:25:51 · answer #8 · answered by buldawg 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Might be, why do some single people only fall in love with Married People? Maybe it is the "impossibility" of the situation that drives it.
2006-12-20 00:03:12 · answer #9 · answered by nutwpinut 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it's not love it's infatuation, you just haven't meet the right gay man yet, you will just keep looking
2006-12-20 01:59:54 · answer #10 · answered by TRACER 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋