how do i deal with the fact that my hubby gets upset because i earn more than he does?

Answer 1

if he really loves u he should be happy and proud about you. and there are so many others having the same situation so it is not a big deal to be upset. because the amount u earn individually has nothing to do with ur relationship as long as you both think it as "our money" not "my money". So try to explain it to him very patiently and nicely.

Answer 2

Take it cool. You have to slowly help him come out of this kind of getting upset. This is possible in the measure in which you take it easy. Try to appreciate him for what he earns. Avoid comparing the pay scales. When you have opportunities to dialogue with your hubby make him look at your pay as a blessing. It is not who earns more or less that matters but the love that both of you invest in making your home a really happy one. If you can do something to help your husband to earn more don't forget to extend a helping hand.

Answer 3

That's hard. Your hubby shouldn't get upset in the first place. Try explaining that having more money into the family is always helpful. Mention that you are about to save money from your extra income. You may start an insurance policy or something. This way when you deduct the money you deposit and pay for the insurance policy the net amount could be close or even less that his income.

Answer 4

money is the root cause of most marriage issues. my mom came up with a good idea for her 2nd marriage that has worked for the past 19 yrs so far and they have zero cash issues or fights.

figure up the bills by % of what you make from the total made. now each of you pay that % of the bills each month, then you say put that % into savings, bonds, stocks or anything else you have as well. what is left over, is yours to do as you please.

this is fair cause now you both are equal in %, might not be exact value but that didn't start off equal so it can't end equal.

my step dad makes a lot more than mom so their set up was like her 32% and him 68% for all bills, etc.

today they have a huge 3200 sq ft home, porsche and benz in driveway, etc. they were able to focus on growing instead of bickering on standing still.

Answer 5

I'm in the same situation. My boyfriend gets angry sometimes because I make more money than he does, and I think it's ridiculous. What difference does it make??

I have ambition and I'm smart, so I'm currently in the process of opening my own business...I want a better life, and I'm doing what I can to make that happen. I don't see it as a bad thing.

But my boyfriend doesn't have the ambition and drive that I have, and he's content to stay right where he is. That's fine for him, and I don't judge him for it...but he feels like things aren't "fair" becuase I make more money and I'm doing more with my life.

All I can say is it's HIS problem, not yours. If he can't handle the heat, he needs to get out of the kitchen.

Answer 6

most of the times man are feeling insecure with their partner because she earn more than he gets. But the most important thing is....make feel to your partner that everything you have he is always part of it. That even you earn higher thatn he earn still he is the boss in your house. And most important thing always make constant talk with your hubby.

Answer 7

If your causing the problem by shoving it in his face, and or making him feel inferior by acting superior in some way because you make more money, even with jokes, then he has a reason to feel bad about it. BUT if you aren't doing any of this, then something or someone else is causing that problem with him. Talk to him about it to help him find the source of the problem. Don't be heartless like the first person who answered your thread.

Answer 8

That's his problem, not yours. Sometimes with men it can be a ego thing. My advice, try not to flaunt and rub it in. Hopefully this does not become a big serious problem. Finances are the No1. problem couples have in marriage. The 2nd is sex. You don't want your husband to feel less of a man, so try not to power trip on him. Sometimes that can happen and you won't even realize it.
If all else fails, try to seek out a support group in your area, that involve successful women in your community. There out there.

Answer 9

Chances are that he gets upset at you for earning more because it makes him feel in-secure, since theres nothing you can really do about that, try to find other ways to make him feel secure to make up for that fact, try to find ways to make him feel extra needed around the house or in whatever ways you think might work best for him.... hope this helps.....

Answer 10

It depends, are you constantly bringing it up, or worse, rubbing it in his face?

I make twice as much as my husband and we're perfectly happy. My money is his money, and his is mine, it all goes into the same checking account to pay the same bills at the end of the day. I think most men are pretty receptive to this as long as you don't bring it up or use it as a weapon.