A good friend just slept with a married coworker. She says that its not her problem to feel bad about and that it is up to the husband to be faithful to his wife. I can't help thinking she should have held back from sleeping with a man she KNOWS is married though? Who is right and who is wrong?
2006-12-19 15:33:50 · 35 answers · asked by Very Nice Indeed! 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Nobody is right and nobody is wrong. People are sexual, married, single, whatever... same as it ever was... and always will be. If someone wants to do the nasty, they can always find a partner.
2006-12-19 15:39:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 5⤋
The single person made NO VOWS to anyone, therefore they can do whatever they want. IF the MARRIED person decides to cheat that is on them and no one else. What an attractive person throws themselves at them and they can't say NO, they HAVE to have sex? Um no. They obviously wanted to cheat and they did, the single person is just enjoying the attention.
Besides HOW MANY of these WOMEN find out their man has cheated and STAYS WITH THEM???? This is the main problem. I know women who've shown 700 sexual texts messages back and forth and they will still side w/the husband because they are too pathetic to have any self worth. If we raised women to be more confident, assertive and believe in their self worth they'd leave the sorry POS's and not settle. Just my opinion! :)
2014-12-10 08:34:29 · answer #2 · answered by Phan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not wrong. Just because someone is your friend, doesn't mean you have to support them when they're clearly doing something that is morally wrong. It shows what type of person she is. She's so selfish that she cares more about what she wants than about the family and marriage she is helping to destroy. And the man that she is messing around with? Why would she do that with such a lowlife that is cheating on his own wife? Why would she even want to be with that guy, knowing what kind of person he is and what he can do to his wife? It's so sad. Honestly, I wouldn't continue the friendship. I would sit her down, explain nicely to her that you care about her friendship, but that you don't like the choices she's making or the person she's become, and tell her that you will not continue to be her friend and support it. Think about it, if that's her moral scope, that she can do that, I'd start thinking about what she could do to me. It's someone I wouldn't trust anymore, to be frank. And she expects you to be supportive of it? It's clear she has a me, me, me mentality? What about you and what you're going through? How are you supposed to support that? Please tell her this... I'm an infidelity couples counselor: out of all the married men that go on to divorce their wives, only 3% of them actually end up marrying "the other woman." And out of that 3$, 80% of those couples divorce within 5 years. Those are statistics she needs to know, because apparently she's living in la la land. Good luck. Personally this is a friend I wouldn't want to have anymore.
2016-03-29 01:01:52 · answer #3 · answered by Sheila 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are absolutely right because the man could have kids and that could hurt them emotionally. She needs to realize that she is also a part of the problem. Not trying to sound mean or anything but is that all she has going for herself....sleeping with married men? I mean it really is sad because they both knew better and just didn't care. I mean, if he has kids and if he goes through a nasty divorce, the children are going to be the ones that suffer. She needs to own up to her part because she did sleep with him. It wasn't like he twisted her arm and forced her to sleep with him. She does have a mouth to say "no" and she should have confronted him in the first place. Talk to her and ask her if the shoe was on the other foot, how would she feel that someone was saying, doing, acting the same way she was? They are both wrong because he is a married man and she didn't respect herself nor his wife and he should just be ashamed of what he did.
2006-12-19 15:43:31 · answer #4 · answered by frakmomma04 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
There is NO right here.. She is considered a mistress, it kind of sounds to good to me, I can think of a lot better names for her.. Hey Honey, the only thing I can say to a litttle trash like her is what goes around comes around .. Her day will come and she will look back at all the married men she's slept with, and wonder why her man is cheating on her, and yes it will be with a tramp slut just like she is .. I just hope the poor wife doesn't end up with a S,T.D. These Cheater's need to hit the road..
2006-12-19 15:53:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
They both are wrong he promised his wife that he will love her till death do them part. He promised to be faithful to her. She is also wrong because she knew he was married shame on her. Well what comes around goes around I hope when she finds that special someone that she loves that the same thing happens to her so she will know exactly how it feels to be betrayed and not give a care about other people in this world.
2006-12-19 16:51:35 · answer #6 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it is wrong to sleep with someone's husband no matter what the situation is. She can't say its his job to stay faithful, it is her job to also do the right thing. She is using him as an excuse to her actions when she should be accountable for her actions. Maybe u should ask her how she feels if it was her man sleeping with another girl? Would she say it's up to him to stay faithful even if the girl knew all along he was with her?
Something to think about!!!
2006-12-19 16:25:51 · answer #7 · answered by africangirl 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is WRONG. Even though the cheating husband was very wrong to do what he did, no self respecting woman would demean herself by sleeping with a married man, knowing that he was just using her. Does she feel good being USED? If she respects herself, she would know this was wrong.
2006-12-19 15:38:20 · answer #8 · answered by hereisjeni 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
well, honestly....this is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, so i would advise you to just stay out of it & let her do whatever she wants with her life, eventually in the long run she will see what she's doing wrong & just learn from it. It's not up to you to decide or figure out who's right & who's wrong, simply because this situation doesn't concern you in any way what so ever. A good friend telling you something like this will expect you to just listen to her, keep your mouth shut & not get involved, judge her or even mad at her for her actions in this situation. To even post this on the internet is a violation of her privacy. There's nothing more worse than having a friend like you judge her & be nosy when your duty is to be a friend & just listen when she needs to talk about it. Trust me......MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS ABOUT THIS, because if you don't then you will lose her & every friend you meet if you continue this attitude. I'm not being mean, I'm being honest & direct.
2006-12-19 15:56:54 · answer #9 · answered by sugarBear 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
If she KNEW for a fact that he was married when they slept together, then she is just as guilty as he is! A friend of mine also slept with a married man fairly recently. His marriage ended as a result. Her justification: "Well, he wasn't in a GOOD relationship!" Newsflash: If it acts like a homewrecker, it probably is indeed a homewrecker!!
2006-12-19 15:49:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anna H 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, when she gets pregnant and then expects the married man to do something then the wife can say; it's not their problem she got knocked up because she didn't have the self-control. Enjoy being used and raising a kid alone.
2006-12-19 15:38:05 · answer #11 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋