Can a normal girl like to have a guy to come home to but enjoy not being restricted to one guy all the time?

Question

thats kind of the situation i'm in, and i have a freind who - since finding out - thinks its messed up.

essentially, i've ben with a girl for 6 months, and we're both free. i've never used it, and she goes out with her freinds from college about once a month. i ask no questions what happens, so i don't know if she's ever used her freedom. for all i know, she hasn't - and the whole speculating whats happening can be fun.

we just have three rules: always use utmost protection, we communicate about concerns, and anything we do is jst a hook up. - nothing to get between us.

my freidn thinks girls are wired to get attached to any guy they get with. so i guese its kind of a gamble.

what do you guys think?

ps - i picked bueaty and style because a) i asked in singles, and wanted some more respnses; and b) i figured there would be a variety of female oppinions here. thanks

Answer 1

Well, anytime you sleep with someone, you can take the risk that it is going to get between you and the one you are in a relationship with.

Your agreement may seem like it works at first but ultimately it isn't iron clad.

I would say that your friend seems to have an unhealthy fear of commitment.

Not everyone needs a commitment or to be partnered with someone.

Do you have a "Friends with benefits" relationship or is it something more?

Answer 2

if it works for you and this girl you are with, that is all that matters. If you both have the rules set out..and you both are ok with the fact each other can sleep with other people, then it's all good. The probelm comes when one person does'nt agree to it..or one person becomes more possive for some reason. I guess it wuld be the same as an "open marriage"..many people are into that..so have fun!..don't worry what others think, they are just not into what you are.

Answer 3

SOME females can, not all....this is why I married the man I did. He appreciates and encourages my independence. I had male friends before he came along and he had female friends before I came along. I trust him completely and he trusts me completely. As long as we don't violate the privacy of our marriage (cheat, give too much personal info) we can do whatever we want. We don't suffocate each other or depend on each other too much so that we appreciate each other more. But then, we are much older and have learned a lot of life's lessons, so maybe this isn't an issue for us as it may have been if we had met when we were younger and not as wise...it works for us any how...

Answer 4

Depends on the type of girl.

I like your style of relationship though. 'Cause I'm like that too. I don't understand why people get all uptight about it. It's not like we're married to our partners right. And we're totally fine with what's going on.

Besides at the end of the day, you know who your partner is and that's about the only important thing there is.

I think if you prefer to do it that way, you shouldn't let other people's opinion sway you. Both you and your girl aren't having any problems with it. So why should other people? Its YOUR relationship.

I support you.

Answer 5

Sounds to me like you both have a "freedom checklist" that you abide by, but here's the problem that perhaps you might have not forseen. What if she is just biding her time until she finds someone better than you? I bet you might not like that and you might feel used, especially since you haven't used your side of the "freedom." But, if you don't care if she's playing you then you don't really have anything to worry about, do you?

Answer 6

you have fun speculating that your live-in girlfriend might, just might, have sex with men she meets when out with her college friends? why is that? most men feel a commitment when they live with their girlfriends, and most men and women do not want their partner to cheat.

it is true that girls are wired to be attached to any guy that they have sex with: as my wise, sadly dead father told me:

women are hurt because they lead with their hearts. having been married twice and divorced twice, one divorce poisoned by actions of adultery of my husband and the other peaceful because neither one of us were adulterers, i see why my father told me that. it hurt my heart that my first husband cheated on me. i cried, i blamed myself when i shouldn't have, i was so hurt inside. that's the same thing that happens to a man.

sadly for me at my age, it is very, very hard to form a bond with a man around my age because so many times, their ex wives cheated on them. they lost that essential element to a viable partnership, which is called trust.

well, i'm not a guy, but i felt i just had to answer your question.

i wish you good luck, but i don't think your living arrangement is going to last with these "freedom" rules you and she have set up.

Answer 7

Well for me this would not work at all, but different strokes...

Regardless of rules, whatever, I think it's risky behavior.

And it is true that girls focus more on relationships and feelings than guys who focus on activities and events.

I would not be surprised if it ends badly, but I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.