do u like my poem?

Question

Highways

Looking for openings in the sky
she waves good bye to surrealism
wrapping the present of time
hiding it in her truth
for no fool to know

the highway seems scarred
by too many stories
racing into the night
of journeys never appreciated
impossible to rewind

my eyes can’t stay open
to see all the beauty
as the sun sets behind me
I cast judgment upon towns
under the palm of my hand

sad faces in fallen trees
wanting to tell stories
to fall apart and have a stranger
put them back together
a jigsaw puzzle

ponds dirtied with who we are
where sins are washed away
until sense is again made
forgiving until youth
brings you back to yourself

the music of nature lasts
but worlds shown through words
are never three dimensional
so we find in time we fail
to reveal beautiful truths

Still angels hover above
when my beatless heart goes numb
never knowing the freedom
of appreciating life
as it unfolds before my eyes

Answer 1

Margaret Atwood poses in her oft-quoted famous lecture, "Negotiating with the Dead," a writer should ask her/himself three questions:Who are you writing for? Why do you do it? Where does it come from?
The poem sounds interesting but you may need to reconsider the 5th stanza. Why this sudden "you"! You may also reconsider some of the biblical/X-tian allusions like "Still angels hover above."
I like the line, "the music of nature lasts" but these subsequent ones sound a bit vague: "so we find in time we fail/to reveal beautiful truths." Get a more specific lexicon for "surrealism" This line sounds a little sneaky "Looking for openings in the sky". Sounds like a burglar trying to escape our wrath!! and what does "she" of 2nd line refer to! Why plurality of title but singularity in stanza 2? Or is it what they call poetic lisense!!
Overall, ask yourself: does the poem convey your meaning well even if for example, deleted stanza 5?

Answer 2

It's very good but as I presume, the poem is about highways and I think you go a little off track when you continue the poem. People have to remind themselves it's about highways. But, you've got something going there =))))

Answer 3

your poem is very nice,i writhe poems to and i like yours to.its letting are mind wondering around and fell well after we right.its source of calming effect that's my opinion.writhe more its good for letting out the stress.Happy Holidays.GOD love you i do. xo