She treats him like he's either a small toddler or like her personal husband. If he doesn't call her everyday, she calls his employer, all of his friends, former landlords and drives around looking for him. He's middle aged, married and this is ruining the marriage! He's been fired from several jobs becuase she calls and says he has disappeared. She has called the police on several occasions and reported him missing. We go out of town for the weekend and she shows up. Help!
2006-12-19 10:57:18 · 22 answers · asked by Blossom 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
As others said, her middle aged son has to put his foot down!
In the mean time, beat her to the punch with the rash of crud she's dishing out by going to the police, calling his work, etc.
The son has to take the bull by the horns and stop allowing her to keep ruining his life. To do this, you must convince him that no matter what he has to do (legally and emotionally) you'll support him.
If she calls... Take messages and do not say, "let me get him." (etc.)
Put her off... Tell him she called... But put her off and insist he not call her even though she can make his life miserable if he doesn't.
Then if she calls his work, the police or whoever... Then HE has to stand up and be a man by explaining to others to please be patient while his mother learns how to stop butting into everything he does.
2006-12-19 11:27:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You take her to the side and have a nice little chat with her. Explain to her how you feel and that you are now his new mother and not her. Don't be mean or rude,just explain how you feel. If that doesn't work then move far the hell away from them as possible and visit only on or during the holidays. If not, your marriage will not last. Having your husband still tied to her apron strings, You'll begin to hate him for this, even if it's not yours or your husband's fault. Believe me I've been here and Now my ex-husband ,is 40, and still living with momma and has been since birth, until he joined the service, and then when he was out, he went right to mama and has been there ever since. and I've gone on with my life without him.
2006-12-19 11:20:29 · answer #2 · answered by patricia h 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From 27 yrs of experience in dealing with the mil from hell, theres nothing much you can do about this except to adapt to it. Shes obviousily going to be around for awhile and you dont want to upset status quo with your husband so theres not much you can do. I have prayed for 27 yrs every day that my mil will move on, but hasnt happened yet. The worst part is mine lives with us for the past 6 yrs due to 2 severe strokes so we cant get away, so realize it can always be worse. If you figure out a legal way to get your mil out of the way,please let me know. Good luck and Merry Christmas
2006-12-19 11:08:38 · answer #3 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you married to that man? You are not the one to deal with the mother but her son (your husband, I guess). Does he like to be treated that way? Why hasn't he done anything by now? It seems to me that this woman (the mother) is acting like crazy, I mean this is not a normal behavior. The son should talk with his mother and set limits. Some mothers are obsessive with their sons but there are limitations and your husband should do something about that. Good luck!
2006-12-19 12:14:13 · answer #4 · answered by vicktop 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to get meds for her Bi-Polar disorder. Tell her that if she does not leave ya'll alone you will disapear, and fall of the face of the earth. There is nothing wrong with loving your family,but sounds like she has crossed the line. I feel your pain.I really hope thing do get better for you,It is close to Christmas, make it your News Years goal to get her some help counceling & meds.I'm not kidding.I'm a strait forward person ,so please don't take anything I said as mean or cruel.
2006-12-19 11:11:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So after examining your umm..question? i'd desire to declare i did no longer particularly get what you have been asking..It replaced right into slightly long and regarded extra like a rant to me.. anyhow, i think of that's infantile which you're protecting score and calling his 5-7 y/o's grasping..How does he sense approximately this?! they are young ones they constantly learn..additionally grandparents constantly attempt and out do the dad and mom,the entire smash element. Does the grandma have a dating with the mum? nicely whilst they are one they improve out of clothing/toys lots speedier then the older young ones,no longer asserting its honest even regardless of the indisputable fact that it is the actuality.. question your dad and mom do they do extra to your baby then his? consistent with risk the different grandma is in basic terms attempting to verify they get as lots..in basic terms a theory to no longer be rude yet whilst the tables have been became would you particularly sense the same way? in basic terms nutrition for theory stable success with the situation what ever that must be i do no longer particularly see the difficulty..
2016-12-15 04:32:58 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she is lonely. Does she have a husband? If not, encourage her to hang out with people her own age so maybe she will meet someone. Your husband is the one who has to stand up to her and put his foot down. If he doesn't do it, then it will not work. It can't be up to you since it is his mother and he has to do the dirty work in setting boundries.
2006-12-19 11:01:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can do nothing. He needs to teach her appropriate behavior as a mother. If she still persists then he needs to demand it and start to give her less information, including: where he works, his phone number, and anything else she causes problems in. They should keep in contact on his terms. He can go over to her house and visit and he can make the phone calls.
2006-12-19 11:02:46 · answer #8 · answered by Lexi Lexington 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sound like the mother-in-law needs to get a life, too much idle time on her hands. the son should tell her to stop the b.s., it is none of her business where he works, so she should not even have a work number for him.she sounds like she might have a drinking or drug problem to go to such extremes about his where abouts.you should tell your husband he needs to stand up to her and be a man, you married him and not his mother.
2006-12-19 11:11:39 · answer #9 · answered by Indiana Colts Fan 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He has to put a stop to this. You unfortunately can do nothing about it. He has to put his foot down and stand up to his mother, this is ridiculous behavior. Getting him fired from jobs, showing up on weekends away. You poor girl, this is really scary. Good luck and God bless****
2006-12-19 11:00:52 · answer #10 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋