My friend (Z) and I have lived together for 6 weeks summer program. It was fine. We decided this year to live together all year becuz we got along well, went out together, and we were both clean. Within 3 months, we were constantly having issues. I live in a college dorm. In out suite there are 2 bedrooms. 2 girls in each room. Our suitemates--One moved out becuz of a verbal altercation and other issues she had with Z. the other suitemate went abroad. Me and Z have not been speaking to each other since Nov. there is no way we can be friends again. During our little fight, she has said things like, im crazy, and i do things on purpose to get her mad, and that im a weirdo. Honestly I dont care wat she says anymore. Ive had it with her. i dont want to work it out. i am waiting to get a room transfer but it hasnt happened yet. in the mean time ive started sleeping in the other room ( that my suitemates moved out of). its awkward being in the same dorm with her. she is a bully.
2006-12-19 09:21:32 · 5 answers · asked by beautiful is a phase 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
she is consistently inconsiderate - has friends over until 2-3am in our room.
goes out and comes back at like 4am with ppl, and they are very loud, laughing and screaming.
she is selfish, keeping paper plates, cups etc, in our clothes closet.
and she is rude. She is one of those glamourous diva types, and im just sick of it. at the same time. She basically has this SHITLIST, and once you do something to her, you are screwed for life. at one point we were friends, then this happened, and during this my grandmother passed, and SHE never showed concern. she is a bully, and im not like that, I dont get mad very easily, i dont like to argue, i dont even wanna talk things out with her, becuz im afraid that it will escalate. i hate living with her. also shell say things to ppl on the phone so that i can hear her, and shell talk abt me. and i thinks its sooo obnoxious. what should i do to stay SANE. and NOT kill her this winter break, as we will BOTH be here, all throughout the break
2006-12-19 09:29:04 · update #1
stick it out till the other room is available.
just be Glad you are not like her'
she will fail college .
you won't
2006-12-19 09:35:22 · answer #1 · answered by StarShine G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats also a reason not to work with friends.
Expectation - reality = disappointment
With friends its easy to assume that you have the same expectations, when they are actually very very different. Given a situation that puts them to the test (like living together, co-owning a company, or being married) it often reveals how not-aligned they are.
The first thing that works well in the case that might help you with your friend is communicating to her that you love her, and that you are sorry that what you did & said hurt her. You dont have to be sorry for what you did, but you are truly sorry that it hurt her. You wish that she hadnt been hurt.
Give first. I know your heart wants her to make right too, and unsay the hurtful things she said. If everyone worked like that it would never happen. The only way things are made right is if everyone is the "bigger person" and gives first. There are things that you said and did that you know hurt her, and angered her. To make right, you need to speak - tell her what you did wrong, why it was wrong and what you should have done and you need to act - figure out the cost to her heart that it took, and then find a way to give that worth back to her. If she makes good after that, then you have your friend back. If she doesnt, thats still okay. The choices you make make you, and you want to be the kind of person who leaves the world a better place than you came to it - your conscience will be absolutely free and clear, it feels like you are totally weightless. Your friend will remember that you were the "bigger person", and that you truly did make right.
Remember the lesson for the future, and become a student of communication. Learn how to align expectations from the start. Become a student of reconciliation - conflict resolution is a superior skill to have in life.
2006-12-19 09:32:20 · answer #2 · answered by Curly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've had the chance to see this first hand. With Women, you go your separate ways. Unfortunately, this is what happens. Men usually have a Beer & go out they are usually always buddies. Find a nice roommate that you are compatible with & life will be simple. Your life is just begining.
2006-12-19 09:28:30 · answer #3 · answered by Mr Brightsides 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
verify they are not going to pass city on you and leave you caught with their proportion of the charges. My lil bro did that to his roommates. He wasn't on the hire, so there replaced into no longer something they could do approximately it. discover out what style of lifestyle they stay to work out if it is going to "mesh" with yours. The bookworm who's working finished-time and going to college heavily isn't out all hours of the night partying each and each of the time, or attempting to convey a gaggle of weirdos into your residing house because of the fact they're too busy with paintings & college. discover somebody you think of you may desire to be acquaintances with when you consider which you are able to finally end up putting out lots on the residing house, enjoying video games jointly or who's conscious of. once you're a neat-freak, do no longer undertaking renting to a slob or it is going to piss you off. do no longer hire a room to somebody who will come onto you or which you would be attracted to. that's basically inquiring for undertaking and that i've got considered various people in extraordinary circumstances because of the fact of it. I rented from a guy that replaced into kinda flirty with me, and it weirded me out. My chum rented from some lady and that they attached and the subsequent element you comprehend she kicks him out and could no longer supply him back his stuff. i do no longer comprehend what age-selection you're in, yet possibly you have them furnish references. Preferrably from different places they have rented from. discover out in the event that they're reliable. And basically because of the fact a individual has a "checklist" does not advise they seem to be a bad individual, discover out their part of the story too. My chum has a checklist so no condo will hire to him. the reason he has a checklist replaced into for assisting a chum... This lady found out she replaced into pregnant and advised her boyfriend, her boyfriend did no longer prefer to be a daddy so he began punching her interior the tummy, and my chum walked up and knocked the guy out to maintain the lady and her unborn toddler. And that makes him a felon. He knew what he replaced into stepping into whilst he decked the guy, and he did it besides because of the fact it replaced into the main suitable element to do. he's no longer a drug addict, he's no longer a assassin or a rapist, yet he's a felon. And he makes a advise grilled ham & cheese even however he's vegan. activity historical past delivers you a concept of their dependability too. Are they reliable, or do they hop around lots? and so on.
2016-10-05 12:40:32 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you telling me this? Do you have a question or NOT?>?!!!!
2006-12-19 09:32:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋