Is it wrong to ask a friend to be a live sperm donor for a couple if the husband has been diagnosed with sperm and fertilitly handicaps? I am talking about a poor man's "sperm donation", ie: (woman gets it on with another man during ovulation strictly for procreation purposes).
2006-12-19 08:23:15 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
It will certainly put a strain on your marriage and on your friendship. How solid is your relationship? No matter how mature everybody is about this, there's bound to be massive amounts of friction.
Up to you, but think about it - at the very least, you'll end up cutting that third party from your life. I can't imagine a normal man not feeling enormously jealous, no matter how hard he tries.
2006-12-19 08:27:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
We're going the expensive route, because I didn't want the biological father to be close. That and I can't have sex with someone other than my husband. ICK!The biological father can demand rights later, even if they agreed not to when you do it. The biological father may decide you're raising 'his' kid wrong, tell you what you're doing wrong, may want visitation rights, tell the world what you did to get pregnant. If you're religious, this is a major no-no. And your husband may have issues about it, even if he says he's "ok" with you having sex with a friend.
If you can get around the friend as a biological father issue, then if you go to a reproductive clinic, you get your friend to donate his sperm at the clinic and they inseminate you. Insemination costs about $300 a pop.
If you decide to buy a donor's sperm after all, find a good sperm bank, (California Cyrobank is very professional and I highly recommend them) donor sperm is about $300 to $380, depending on what type you buy, IUI, ICI or whatever. If you go this route, call and make sure the donor has confirmed pregnancies, is young (20's) and hasn't been frozen for longer than 4 years (frozen longer = higher chance of freezer burn)
You can get loans and the like to help pay for this, ask at the fertility clinic. Also if your employer offers Flex spending, you can have them take out your doctor's visits pretax, which saves you a lot of money in the long run.
All in all, I'd rather pay then have sex with a male friend.
2006-12-19 08:39:42 · answer #2 · answered by nokhada5 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe i have problems reading but i know what a sperm donation is. if the man and woman feel comfortable asking someone to be a sperm donor and the donor is OK with it then what is the issue.
i must point out that the woman is not supposed to sleep with other people to get pregnant. there are doctors offices for that so that the baby is not made from adultery! the sperm are still alive without shooting them in directly. i cant imagine that the man with the handicap being OK with her sleeping with another man to get pregnant
2006-12-19 08:29:27 · answer #3 · answered by mel2430 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
There a lot of legal implications in this. They would have to have paperwork done to make sure that the donor is never accountable for the child.
There's also a moral factor. "getting it on" with another man could cause relationship damage, even if it is for procreation purposes.
Ultimately, everyone involved would have to be in 100% agreement. But nobody can make that choice except for those involved.
It's not necessarily wrong, but it comes with a lot of things to consider before following through.
2006-12-19 08:30:58 · answer #4 · answered by brianna's mama 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think this can depend on a number of things. First it depends strictly on what you mean by "wrong". Naturally? Well yes but not totally. A male can impregnate a female in nature and not raise the children. Ethically? It would seem to me that if all three parties are comfortable with that, then no it wouldn't be wrong. However there are also other choices like in-vitro fertilization, so they wouldn't have to copulate (have sex). I see this as possibly necessary for people who desperately want to raise children together but may have difficulties with adoption, etc. I do think however that if the child wanted to know about their real father that the information shouldn't be witheld and they should know biologically their father is somebody else, but that their "true father" is the man who helped to raise them. Love is thicker then blood.
2006-12-19 08:28:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
it's been done before many times. Some couples will go through great lengths to have a baby. But why can't the sperm just be implanted into the women with a procedure done in a doctor's office
2006-12-19 08:28:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
What are the legal rights and restrictions of the participants in such a situation? You need to check that out first. The next step is their health. You don't need any STD involved in this either. Otherwise 1 + 1 does not always = 2, but its their choice.
2006-12-19 08:32:38 · answer #7 · answered by Krumah 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Watch the movie, 'The Big Chill', and have your friend/couple watch it, too. It explores this theme(among others) as a group of old college friends get togethor after a funeral for one of their own. It's from around 1983-4. Stars Tom Berenger, Glenn Close, William Hurt, and other notables.
Excellent movie!
2006-12-19 08:30:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would you want another women sleeping with your hubby for procreation reasons only--If you want to pick your sperm donor--do it the right way--in the medical community--You do not just have sex with some one to get prego when you are in a realationship--also most medical insurances will help with the cost of infertility--You need to go through a Doctor-
2006-12-19 08:26:43 · answer #9 · answered by mommyof3 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
my husband and i offered that to a very very close friend of mine. Her husband has a low sperm count and they have been unable to conceive after 5 years. The offer is on the table for them after they have exhausted all other avenues.
No it is not wrong if both parties consent to it. I think you already knew that answer though.
2006-12-19 08:29:55 · answer #10 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋