My finace seems very concerned that our gift-exchanges are fair and balanced.?

Question

My finace seems very concerned that our gift-exchanges are fair and balanced. Specifically, he wants to ensure that we both spend the same amount of money. I don’t disagree; in fact, I was glad that we were able to talk about it and put a “cap” on our Christmas gifts to one another. Unfortunately, he talks about this type of thing often enough that I’ve grown uncomfortable. He has mentioned a few times how many presents he has purchased for me for Christmas. He has also mentioned that he has to buy more presents because I have placed more than one under the tree for him. I noticed this around my birthday, when he commented on how much he’d spent on my gift. In the same conversation, he talked about what I’d bought for his birthday, and what he had bought for my last birthday. It makes me feel like he’s keeping tabs on the dollar amount we’re both spending on each other, and that there’s some sort of running total that needs to be even. At first I thought he was trying to let m

Answer 1

You cannot balance every issue in life 50/50. Sometimes one party gives more than the other, and another time it's reversed. You don't want to start keeping score or you'll end up forever disappointed. Set up an allowance for gifts of so many $$ each month. If you spend more on Valentine's Day and less on his birthday, so be it, at the end of the year it will even out and no one is counting every penny the other person spends. Besides, if you're a better shopper, and can find a fab leather jacket at a bargain price, why not. Whatever happened to "it's the thought that counts?"

Answer 2

I have a person who does this too. Makes me ill. He keeps mentioning the same things and is constantly trying to let me know how many gifts he has gotten and how much he is spending. I hate it and its a total turn off. I told him not to get me anything for x-mas because the stress of it is killing me. I cannot and will not spend what he expects. I just wont. I dont buy things that expensive for myself....lol. I dont know why he does this and I dont know why he doesn't realize that its totally tacky. I cant wait to see what others say about it.

Answer 3

Well, I personally don't think that you should put a PRICE on LOVE! It doesn't matter what it cost b/c it should always come from the Heart to me that what means the most. It should never be a comparison. So next Christmas kill him with anticipatition and don't put anything under the tree till Christmas morning and tell him St.Nick must of passed during the night...