I am having trouble being intimate with pregnant wife *serious question*?

Question

Myt wife is about 2 months pregnant with our first baby and doesn’t look pregnant yet. I still find her attractive and I will when she is 9 months pregnant as well. Attraction is not the problem as I am able to become aroused by her.

Problem is that I am not able to finish because I am afraid of hurting her abdomen. Her uterus area is sore and she doesn’t want pressure on it because it makes her uncomfortable, so the entire time we are having sex I think about how she must be uncomfortable and I can’t finish.

We tried other positions where I am not putting weight on her stomach, but I am still nervous about hurting her uterus or something stupid like that!

Is this normal for a guy? How can I get over it? Also, will I be even more worried when her stomach is bigger?

Answer 1

Maybe you guys should just try having oral sex to completion instead of intercourse. If she is constantly uncomfortable it's natural (and healthy) that you won't be able to enjoy yourself either.

Answer 2

Calm down. :) I think many guys go through this and just isn't as vocal about it as you. There is a lot of stuff between you and the baby. Cervix, Amniotic fluid, etc.... you are not going to harm your wife or the baby in any way. If you are still nervous or uncomfortable go and read up and get more information. The only time sex is not OK during pregnancy is when your Dr. tells you so. OH, and your wife won't be as tender here shortly, so don't worry about that either. Check out some of the articles on the website I provided a link to, you should find that helpful.

Answer 3

Why don't you stop having sex until she says it doesn't hurt any more and about you hurting her your not hurting her if you were hurting her she would probably tell you and if she has then just don't have sex until she has the baby or when she's ready. And don't worry this is normal for a guy a lot of guys wonder if their hurting their wife by being intimate with them when their pregnant. I don't think you can get over it but you could talk to your wife about it and ask her if your hurting her. You proabaly will be worried when her stomach gets bigger, a lot of husbands do. well good luck I hope you find a good answer.

Answer 4

You won't hurt her or the baby, if that's your question. You might find it comforting to know that unless you're the most well-endowed man on the planet, you're probably not even coming close to hitting her cervix, so relax! The baby will not be bothered. If she's feeling irritation (which is normal -- I experienced some as well), try different positions so she has more control over things. Sometimes the tissues in the vagina get dry and irritated so you might want to try more foreplay to get her heated up a bit more. Also, you might consider the spooning position from behind her with both of you facing the same direction. This will be easier as well when her belly is bigger too.

Good luck and congratulations to you and your wife on your baby!

Answer 5

Which positions are the most comfortable?
Here are some time-tested positions and tips for making love while you're pregnant:

• Lie sideways. Having your partner on top demands increasingly creative gymnastics as your tummy swells. But lying partly sideways allows your partner to keep most of his weight off your uterus.

• Use the bed as a prop. Your bulge isn't an obstacle if you lie on your back at the side or foot of the bed with your knees bent, and your bottom and feet perched at the edge of the mattress. Your partner can either kneel or stand in front of you.

• Lie side-by-side in the spoon position, which allows for only shallow penetration. Deep thrusts can become uncomfortable as the months pass.

• Get on top of your partner. It puts no weight on your abdomen and allows you to control the depth of penetration.

• Have your partner enter you from a sitting position, which also puts no weight on the uterus. Try sitting on your partner's lap as he sits on a sturdy chair.


Have faith — where there's a will, there's a way. With a little experimenting, you and your partner are sure to find a technique that works for you

Answer 6

You both need to get over worrying about it. If she's too concerned about feeling uncomfortable then she too won't be able to enjoy it and all your effort will almost be in vain. For her to be on top (as someone suggested) probably not the best idea since there is even more penetration when the woman is on top. It doesn't matter what you do or how you do it, the chances of her getting hurt are almost inexistent. I've been through 2 pregnancy's and nothing held us back. In fact the woman's body goes through so many changes that being intimate and not stressing about it is very important. Concentrate more on pleasing her and feel her all over during..and you both will forget about the rest. More stimulation and foreplay will help both of you enjoy it more too.

Answer 7

Thank you for being serious about this question. I have spent 5 years as a labor and delivery assistant and have had many dads express this concern. Usually moms would tell me about the concern because so many soon to be dad's are embarrassed. So first of all - kudo's for your courage.

So yes, you are normal! Getting over it is a bigger question- the best answer I can give you is communicate, communicate, communicate. If you know that she's not in pain, and instead focus on giving her pleasure - the entire experience will be better for both of you.

This is a miraculous time and it is considered, by most doctors, healthy for mother AND baby for mom and dad to continue with regular sexual interaction.

Mom's most likely to feel less attractive as she blossoms in pregnancy. Remember romance in and out of the bedroom and remember the fun you had creating that bundle to be. Unless the doc says to take a time out - relax and have fun.

Hope this helps.

Answer 8

i am 9 months pregnant and my bf was concerned at first but the best position to me is from the back but doctor's say the best position is when the girl is on top. my bf was worried more and more as my stomach got bigger but he's over it now

Here are some time-tested positions and tips for making love while you're pregnant:
• Lie sideways. Having your partner on top demands increasingly creative gymnastics as your tummy swells. But lying partly sideways allows your partner to keep most of his weight off your uterus.

• Use the bed as a prop. Your bulge isn't an obstacle if you lie on your back at the side or foot of the bed with your knees bent, and your bottom and feet perched at the edge of the mattress. Your partner can either kneel or stand in front of you.

• Lie side-by-side in the spoon position, which allows for only shallow penetration. Deep thrusts can become uncomfortable as the months pass.

• Get on top of your partner. It puts no weight on your abdomen and allows you to control the depth of penetration.

• Have your partner enter you from a sitting position, which also puts no weight on the uterus. Try sitting on your partner's lap as he sits on a sturdy chair.

this is from a website i hope it helps you

Answer 9

It is totally normal and very sweet of you to worry! You really won't hurt the baby unless you are getting very carried away but if it is uncomfortable for her she may want to talk to her doctor about it during her next visit but most likely its just her uterus stretching out for the baby. Just remember there are other things you can both do for each other. We had the same problem the first time around. Congrats.

Answer 10

This is totally normal. There's no easy answer outside of trying different positions and explaining to her that you're uncomfortable. I think that once her belly gets bigger you will most definately be worried about hurting her but you'd better get it now while she's in the mood because women's sex drives can decrease as the months go along.

Answer 11

Hi. This is a very common concern for a father-to-be. Unless your wife is having severe pain or spotting during intercourse, there is nothing to worry about. You will not hurt the baby. As she gets further along in her pregnancy, the most comfortable position is "spooning". I'm 22 weeks pregnant with my 4th child. Congratulations and enjoy your private time together.