My husband and I work together in the same office. We have been together many years and just had a child. I have always had ill feelings towards one of his female co-workers, for the fact that I don't feel she acts appropriate towards him, or respects me. She used to be friendly towards me, but lately avoids me all together....pretty much walks away when she sees me coming. He and I have hit a rough patch, and different clues make me think he is cheating on me with her. I already called her once, outside of work and confronted her, she said they were "just friends". I don't know how to handle this situation.
2006-12-19 07:44:01 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have confronted him many times, even accused him. He denies, then avoids, then is defensive, tells me its none of my business......
2006-12-19 07:49:06 · update #1
If you suspect something, then do some private investigation. Whenever a woman says we're ''just friends'' then there is some undercover work going on. Let some co-workers or even a professional assist you in getting answers. You shouldn't have to put yourself through that. Good luck...
2006-12-19 07:47:47 · answer #1 · answered by Toki*Doki 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, it is your business. Second, what other evidences?
What I would think is most likely given the circumstances described is that after your child was born, she realized that your marriage is actually solid, and started to avoid you because she has a hard time with that fact. Your husband, tired of the accusations over the years, withdrew when you started to get suspicious over that, and feels like everything he says is under a microscope even though he's done nothing wrong. That's where I'd be at right now.
But you know more than I do. I'd hire a private eye to find out for sure, then once you know, if he's innocent (like I suspect) then throw yourself at his feet for forgiveness.
2006-12-19 08:36:55 · answer #2 · answered by Sean J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You made a bad move contacting her because now she knows that you're weak and you think that she's having an affair with your husband. Now she'll want to make you feel like something is going on, even if nothing is going on because she's a woman.
Ask your husband whats going on and trust him. But don't be stupid, watch him around her, monitor when he's home and where he's going when he leaves, check his call records (you can go to your service provider online and register for an online account and you can see the numbers he's called most often, since you know her number.)
If all else fails go online and look for GPS locaters that can be put in cars and you can see where he goes. And for the record, it is never a good idea to work with your husband because you'll always be jealous.
2006-12-19 07:53:02 · answer #3 · answered by bridetobebrandie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage takes work and working together even harder! Usually if your gut is saying something is going on then it probably is. Is there someone there at work that you can totally trust to help you, to act like a private eye. More than likely the wife is always the last to know. For your sake and that fact that you have a little one I hope it isn't true. She just needs a little taste of her own medicine, some one to teach her not to be messing with married men!
2006-12-19 07:51:22 · answer #4 · answered by cowgirl! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before you jump into conclusions I would suggest for you to investigate him first. Act like you don't know anything and see what they do. Don't confront your husband until you are certain he is cheating on you. If you do its only going to give him a heads up and make him very careful and you don't want that, he will also call you crazy and insecure. Check his bank statements, cell phone bill, online transactions, and keep your ears an eyes on alert. When you have all your evidence gathered then throw it on his face, then he will have no choice than to admit.
2006-12-19 07:51:29 · answer #5 · answered by ♪♫♫♪ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your instincts are correct. Don't call or confront anymore. Concentrate on your husband. Give him lots of time and attention with MINIMAL nagging - or anything that could be construed as nagging. Flirt with him, complement him, cook, clean and screw him like a drunken nymphomaniac. If that doesn't put an end to the office affair, and get you over this rough patch nothing will.
2006-12-19 07:49:02 · answer #6 · answered by Rachel M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it isn't any of your business, than you guys aren't meant for each other. How long have you guys been married? I mean it could just be the newlywed thing you know. People get suspicious about that kind of thing if they are newly married. You should tell a co-worker that is also a friend to keep an eye on them. Go to marriage counseling.
2006-12-19 07:55:44 · answer #7 · answered by XxXTaRaXxX 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to cheaters... and see if he is cheating. If he spends a lot of time with you I doubt he is. Plus because of the fact that you contacted her probably is the reason she walks away from you. But if you have a gut feeling act on it before it's too late.
2006-12-19 07:53:51 · answer #8 · answered by Destinee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's funny because i work with my husband to, but if you feel in your gut something is going on then you need to put your foot down. You need to let him know that you think she don't respect your marriage and you don't like the way they act around each other. And if you catch him cheating move on, but not before you snatch that bitches head off and take him to the bank
2006-12-19 07:52:51 · answer #9 · answered by portia b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get cheaters on him. Embrass the hell out of both of them on tv.
But be prepared to face any whiplash back at work. You will be sending a message not to be messed with personally and at nobody dares to take you on in the office. You'll be hurting inside for a while, but you will get your point across. If he is a lying cheating scoundrel, get a divorce or live with it
2006-12-19 10:36:47 · answer #10 · answered by quinton p 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋