Would you make her get married? What would you do to her boyfriend if he was only 16?
2006-12-19 06:31:33 · 41 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
If I were in that position, yes, I would let her keep the baby. I'm 16 and I have a two month old daughter that I love more than anything in the world, dont take away her chance to feel the love you had when she was born. I think the marriage thing is really too early for her to decide. Shes going to be having all these new emotions and it will be very hard for her to decide on her own whether she should get married. Her boyfriend probobly doesnt want to make things any worse than they already are so usually, he wouldnt strike a conversation with you. You need to talk to him, to both of them and explain what a big responcibility a baby really is. They may think they know what its going to be like, I did too, but they dont. Your gonig to have to help these kids grow up a lot faster than they should have to. If the boyfriend doesnt want anything to do with the baby, take him to court, make him pay child support and give visitation, hes a parent too so he needs to start acting like one. Good luck with your daughter !
2006-12-19 06:54:35 · answer #1 · answered by liz 1 · 3⤊ 1⤋
No, I wouldn't allow her to keep the baby. I'd make her keep it. She's going to have to learn responsibility someway/someday.
Since she failed to keep her knees together seems now is that time. I wouldn't make her get married. In fact, I'd be highly suspect that such a relationship could/would work or that the boyfriend/potential son-in-law was disciplined enough to provide for/raise a family.
Single parenting isn't a gravy train to be certain. I used to feel sorry for single moms. A few years ago I met a really thoughtful young lady. We got to know each other a little bit.
Come to find out she was a single mom, lived on her own, worked full time and paid all her bills and was finishing up college all on her own without help from the father or her parents. The kid was in daycare or with babysitters an awful lot but she was doing the best she could all on her own and seemed to be the better for it.
So crap happens. The way we think/plan things will/to turn out is hardly the way life throws it back at us all the time. There's lots of variables.
My only condition here is that she must have the baby. With no drugs. She needs to know the full brunt of being a mother to fully appreciate it and avoid making the same mistakes again.
Besides, if she absolutely decides it is not in the best interest of the baby to raise it herself - adoption is always a wonderful option and there are some really great people that are on waiting lists to adopt a child.
2006-12-19 07:31:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would allow her to keep the baby. The best thing that you can do for her is be supportive. Her boyfriend needs to get a after school job to help support the life they have created. I would not make them get married, as a matter of fact I wouldn't even allow it. They are not mature enough. She is going to need a lot of help and support to become a mother at such a young age. Besides, you really have no say. Trust me I have been there. I had my daughter at 14. My mother didn't want me to keep the baby, but I refused to have an abortion. She found out that she couldn't make me so she forced me to get married. Huge mistake. I am divorced and have not seen my daughters father in 6 years. She is 12 now. I have a college degree, a great job, a new husband, and a baby daughter. Things have a way of working out. Help her to make it through this, she can't do it alone. It isn't really as bad as it may seem. If she just can't handle being a parent. Consider adoption. There are so many couples that want to be parents and can't.
Good Luck!!
2006-12-19 06:43:00 · answer #3 · answered by angelbaby4912 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
first of all, that mistake they BOTH made is not the baby's fault, therefore you should let her keep it. even if the baby's is not born yet..it is still a human being and abortion is MURDER!!!! making her get married will only make things worse. they are too young and stuff just wouldn't work out. the one thing you can do regarding the guy is talk to his parents and work something out because he HAS to take responsibility towards your daughter and the child. he cant back up now,its too late. i hope this was helpful for you. good luck!!!! oh, and I'm sure that baby will bring a lot of happiness in your family even if you dont see it that way right now. BIRTH IS A MIRACLE!
2006-12-19 14:59:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My children will know before the age of 16 the baby will be adopted. After 16 they can decide to keep the baby or adopt. If they keep the baby they are to be the parent, and will provide for the baby. However, knowing that is our plan if it were to happen who knows what I will end up doing. I would not make her get married and I wouldn't DO anything to her boyfriend.
2006-12-19 07:04:10 · answer #5 · answered by Question Addict 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! If this is your situation i am really sorry. It's not legal for her to get married as she is too young, so i would rule that idea out. You should slap the boyfriend over the head and make sure he is going to be their for your daughter. Personally if i was your daughter i wouldn't kept the baby. I would want the chance of a career and a life not living off benefits and a baby would kind of stop that. Saying that though if she wants to kept what can you really do? If you want her to give up the baby try and make her see how much work it would be if she was going to kept it. If she does get rid of it i would stop her from going out with boys 3 years older than her, the age gap might not seem that much but when your young its huge, and introduce her to a condom.
2006-12-19 07:07:56 · answer #6 · answered by kt baby 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Where the hell do you live? I'm pretty sure that 13 is too young to marry, even with parental consent.
Even though she is a minor and you are her parent, you don't have the legal right to make her have an abortion or even give up the baby for adoption.
At that age, her best solution is most likely adoption. Thirteen is just too early in life to be burdened with the responsibility of a child.
2006-12-19 09:41:57 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would most certainly allow her to keep it. I don't believe in terminating a pregnancy assuming that is what you are referring to. I would suggest adopting out and then if she agrees to that after the baby is born I would lock her in her room for the next 5 years. 13 year olds shouldn't be having sex.
Definitely don't make her get married. It would just make things worse.
2006-12-19 07:00:56 · answer #8 · answered by bee_girl_18 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If she keeps the baby, you get to raise it. That innocent child needs a mother AND a father in an intact home. Adoption is the only answer. Do what is best for the baby. A mother who is a baby herself isn't it.
2006-12-20 06:34:34 · answer #9 · answered by Dizney 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I don't think it is even legal for 13 and 16 yr olds to get married, and secondly.. She shouldn't keep the child, she is still a child and a 13 yr old giving birth can be harmful for her too. You don't want to lose u'r child by trying to teach her a lesson. And keep in mind she didn't get pregnant all by herself..She shouldn't have to pay the price herself.
Please be supportative to u'r child, sometimes when children see how much their mistakes are hurting their parents, they mature. If this is a situation u are in, Good Luck, remember whatever happens, happens for the best.
2006-12-19 06:49:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋