I took the morning after pill(see my q on side effects) I have just found out I am pregnant. I don't know what to do.I can't go through with it i have one child already and i'm 23. I can't tell my parents. The thing is my mum is a midwife so she could find out if I have a termination what to do??
2006-12-19 05:08:22 · 21 answers · asked by itgirl23 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I don't need insensitive answers thank you. it was an accident. I personally am not fond of abortion but cicumstances have dictated otherwise.
2006-12-19 05:13:42 · update #1
Ok I can understand what you are all saying but it wasn't unprotected!! My first pregnancy was a terrible ordeal as my partner became abusive. I would do it only I think the phsycological implications would be dire. Please understand I don't really want to do it but I need to look after the child I have! As I said it was protected!! Things just went wrong I'm not stupid. I felt sensible thing to do was take the morning after pill. It didn't work! An now I am very scared!
2006-12-19 05:31:12 · update #2
I think maybe anti abortionists should not read this. If you don't like it don't read is all I have to say.
2006-12-19 05:38:39 · update #3
You know what some ppl on here just haven't got a clue. They are so stuck in their ways they can't see past their own rigid ways. I will ignore this because although entitled to an opinion, enforcing it in such a manner is I FEEL disgusting, tactless and heartless. I fell maybe you should have a look at yourselves are you really so perfect?! I think you will find you are NOT!
2006-12-19 10:46:16 · update #4
I would say do what you think is best for you and the child you already have. If that means a termination then so be it.
I don't think your mum would find out if you could possibly have it done at a different hospital to the one she works at.
Ignore all the comments from the anti-abortion brigade, you sound a very sensible young woman who has her head screwed on to me.
Remember it is a womans right to choose.
2006-12-19 06:59:57 · answer #1 · answered by TheYorkshireRose 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Your mother would not find out unless your reaction to the abortion or early pregnancy tipped her off. The practioner is prohibited from telling her. To be safe, you could go further away from your hometown.
You could potentially contact an adoption agency and get money to support yourself and your daughter while you carry the baby. Then, he or she could be given to a couple who has only dreamed of having their own baby. It could be quite a gift.
I would not have an abortion, but then again, I am not in your shoes. I got pregnant at 24 with my son and was unmarried. I could have done it then, but I chose not to and he is the most amazing little guy at 7 1/2!
I know you probably are totally overwhelmed right now and don't need to have people saying harsh things to you. They are out of place. My advice would be for you to go to a crisis pregnancy center. They will probably be anti-abortion, but they can help you see all your options and they can't stop you from getting an abortion if that is what you decide.
You have many different options here. You could also just tell your mom. You might be surprised at how much better that makes you feel. Good luck and many blessings,
Andrea
2006-12-19 13:24:18 · answer #2 · answered by Mom In Training 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think that every baby is put on this earth for a reason and there is a purpose God made that baby. If nothing else, give the baby up for adoption, it has no say so if it lives or dies, it just a poor little baby that want to be loved and cared for. Please, consider adoption over abortion, let that little baby have a chance at life, it could be a doctor, or someone really important. I know its hard, and was an accident, but now you have another life to consider, and that baby should get every chance as your first. Who knows, maybe 6 months, you could change your mind and decide you want the baby, what would you do then if you aborted it? I hope you all the best and I will say a prayer for God to give you the strength you need to do what he believes is right for you.
I am 19 and have 2 girls and they are my life. I love them with all my heart and could not image my life without them. I am also almost 6 weeks pregnant with number 3 and cant wait for it to come. I saw after my second daughter was born, my 2 year old bonded with her so closely, The love they have for each other is the best and I am so happy they are close together and will have each other to grow up with. Sorry people don't like my answer, but that's what I believe and hope that in one way or another I helped someone. God Bless
2006-12-19 13:25:04 · answer #3 · answered by kristin h 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Sorry you've got the God-squad on your back all ready, that's the last thing you need!
First of all, just because your mum is a midwife there's no reason she could find out unless she is deliberatley checking your records, which is illegal. But you could circumvent that by having an abortion at an independent clinic like Marie Stopes if you decide that';s the option you want to take.
No one can tell you whether or not to keep your baby. I couldn't imagine being stuck with two kids at our age (Im 23 also) but that's me, I don't ever want kids.
If you don't want that baby, and it sounds to me like you don't, I think an abortion is the best option, although you could have it adopted if you think you can face carrying it to term, although that way your parents will def find out.
Good luck with your decision and remember, no one has the right to snoop in your private health records, so please dont worry about people finding out.
2006-12-19 13:53:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Your midwife would have to abide by the same laws as your doctor. I.E. she couldnt tell your mother etc. If she told your mother she would be breaking the Data protection Act and can be personally sued for unlimited funds like wise if your mother had a hunch and went snooping at the midwifes office for any details. If you dont want to tell your mum then don't but i think she should know just to give you some support. no matter what choice you take its not going to be easy psychologically or phisically.
good luck with whatever outcome you choose.
2006-12-19 13:38:47 · answer #5 · answered by bebishenron 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Talk it through with a real close friend even your mum. As she is a midwife I am sure she will be very understanding with whatever decision you come to. It sounds as though you have already made your decision though and you need some support during this difficult time. Confidentiality is important in the health profession, speak to your dr and express your concerns about your mum finding out - it may not be necessary for her to know. Best of luck.
2006-12-19 13:22:23 · answer #6 · answered by Louise 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but being 23 and having one child already isn't a reason to murder someone. Maybe you should try NOT SLEEPING WITH PEOPLE until you are married and think you are finally READY for another baby. Fact of life sweetie, can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen! Protected or not, you're not stupid, you know NO protection is 100%. It's your own fault and you'll pay in the long run for murder. I am 21 with my 2 beautiful baby on the way and an incredible 15 month old daughter. Whether married or not I couldn't kill my baby, a life I created. Deal with it!
2006-12-19 14:52:05 · answer #7 · answered by angie_laffin927 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Whether your mother is a midwife or not, she is not legally allowed to view your medical history if you do not want her to. My advice is to talk to the people closest to you. Whether it be friends, family, whoever. Weigh your options. There are a LOT of choices out there. Take time to decide what YOU want. Coming from someone who has had an abortion, PLEASE don't make my mistake and rush into it just because you are scared of someone finding out. There is a LOT of emotional grief that comes along with it and to this day I still am trying to get over what I did.
2006-12-19 13:17:04 · answer #8 · answered by angelbabyface00 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Honey, you are 23 years old. Your parents do not/should not run your life anymore. You need to make your own decisions. Your parents are probaly still going to be there for you no matter what. If you really can not raise another baby then you should think about adoption. I would not ever recommend an abortion though.
2006-12-19 13:16:07 · answer #9 · answered by ragdoll 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
sweetheart don't be so hard on yourself. your gp has a code of confidentiality to consider so i really do not think your mum would find out. secondly it is far bettre in this world if a baby is aborted at an early stage rather than bring a baby into the world that is un-wanted, don't punish yourself do what is right for you. i wish you loads of luck xxxxx
2006-12-19 14:24:35 · answer #10 · answered by bug 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋