She says that all men go through mid-life crisis between 38 and 51 and cheat. She says that their wives know but won't acknowledge it or they know and just write it off like an man would menopause moods. She says that a woman will not know only if she is not very smart or is very good at deceiving herself. Do you believe this?
2006-12-19 01:49:21 · 43 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She doesn't say that marriages should end. She is encouraging forgiveness. She is a bit condescending about men on this topic but she is not bitter. She seems to find it all amusing. She is 60 and has been married 30 years.
2006-12-19 02:06:17 · update #1
NO - ALL men DO NOT cheat!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-19 01:51:41 · answer #1 · answered by into_thematrix 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
What a load of crap.
Some would say that marriage is not for everyone because we are not predisposed to be tied to someone for so long. Yet, you meet couples who have been together for 50 years and are still madly in love and respect each other. Then there are those who know nothing Else except bed hopping and insincerity.
More women cheat today then men. We all go through cycles in life, patterns, change in routines, a need for something different. As long as a couple does not allow the relationship to go stale, and the grow old together and communicate to each other their goals, hopes and wishes. Then there shouldn't be a reason for either to cheat.
Society also plays a role with a lot of temptation and hints at how you are supposed to live your life. The way you are brought up also affects ones perspective on relationships and how to treat people. There are many contributing factors and you cannot live your life paranoid of your significant cheating on you. You must, however, always be communicating with each other so you are both on the same page and getting what you need and want from the relationship.
2006-12-19 02:45:18 · answer #2 · answered by altruisticind 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I absolutely disagree with your counselor. In fact, I would look for another counselor immediately. Men do go through mid-life crisis just the same way women go through menopause, but it is not a license to go cheat and do whatever you want and then blame it on a mid-life crisis. Not all men cheat. There is such a thing as self control. Communication is very important in a marriage and especially during those crisis times. I've known plenty of marriages that have remained faithful through thick and thin, so it is possible for a man to just say NO to cheating and decide to honor the vow he made to his wife (and visa versa).
2006-12-19 01:56:07 · answer #3 · answered by jazz_lover_25 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, not all men cheat.
Yes, men do have a mid-life crisis between 38 and 51, and women seem to have one between 28 and 35.
Not all women cheat during this period also.
Statisically, 40% of men and 38% of women will cheat on their spouse sometime during their marriage. So women are not much better than men.
I think your counselor is being hard on men for some personal reason or another.
2006-12-19 05:17:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that was right of her to voice such an ignorant personal comment. Not all men cheat, just because they are going through a mid life crisis. I am sure they think about maybe experiencing new things but why does she assume that it means they are cheating.
As for the other comment she made about how women tend to ignore it if/when men cheat sometimes is true as some women are already at a age where they feel they can't start over a life or are ashamed or embarrassed of going for help.
I am not sure what to make for the rest of her comments other than she needs to be re trained.
2006-12-19 02:17:15 · answer #5 · answered by K-Marie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO...not all men cheat! Just those I think that may think that they can get away with it or for other some stupid reason. As for women not knowing it because she is not very smart or good at deceiving herself is just an excuse on your counselor. I really think it sounds like maybe she was cheated on by her husband or boyfriend in the past and has hard feelings towards ALL men and thinks that all other women should feel the same way.
Look at all those couples that have been together for many years and are very happy! Do you really think that our grandfathers all cheat on their wives? Do you think that our grandmothers are just stupid or deceiving themselves to think that they arent being cheated on? My parents have been together for 34 years and I know that my father has never or even thought of cheating on my mother.
I really think it's time for you to find a new counselor who doesn't hold such a grudge towards all men.
2006-12-19 01:58:32 · answer #6 · answered by kerrberr95 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My advice to you is to get a new conselor. All men do not cheat. The insecure ones can and do. Mid life crisis is all about insecurity and loosing the boy in him. However it is a fallacy, because he can still meet his dreams.The older he gets the more likely he can obtain his childhood goals. If he is going to cheat, it won't be because of a mid-life crisis, that is an excuse or justification for something else that isn't being fulfilled in him. No matter, get a new counsellor, clearly this one is biased.
2006-12-19 01:56:57 · answer #7 · answered by Shawn M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, I really don't believe this is true. It seems like your counselor is just excusing cheating men. Men may have a mid-life crisis, they all cheat. Certainly not all women know that their men are cheating. Seems like your counselor is just going based off her own experience and making big generalizations.
2006-12-19 01:55:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
confident, i in my view understand somebody who had a counselor say an identical subject. The counselor mentioned because she enjoyed the different guy or woman attempting to shrink them out in the present day and carefully would not artwork yet as a substitute to "ween herself off him" slowly. yet whilst she is going by using herself then it is not "marriage counselor" it particularly is her very own therapist. The therapist then isn't engaged on issues between the husband and spouse purely the spouse's themes. in spite of the undeniable fact that if the therapist is counseling then the two and the husband is properly-known with all this then you certainly would desire to maintain your nostril out of it.
2016-10-18 11:51:11 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that your marriage counselor is biased. She probably wants to believe that so she has an excuse as to why her husband cheated on her. It is a way to ignore reality.
I've never cheated on my wife, and never will. No matter what happens in my life, I wouldn't stoop down to that level. Not even if she cheated on me first. I know what it feels like to be cheated on from a previous relationship and there is no way in hell I'd subject someone else to that kind of emotional torment.
Someone who cheats on the person they "claim" to love is immature and disrespectful, and are probably lacking in self-control. If you truely love someone and care about your relationship with them, you wouldn't knowingly go out and destroy whatever chance you have at making it last.
There is NO excuse for cheating in a relationship! NONE!! To believe otherwise merely shows a lack of intelligence.
2006-12-19 02:00:56 · answer #10 · answered by Ritz Grimarren 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel that if a man was being treating right at home, MOST men would not cheat. Some men are going to cheat no matter what. But not the majority, Some me are just dogs. MOST ARE NOT!!!
2006-12-19 01:59:52 · answer #11 · answered by Moreno 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋