UK! How would a chav recognise theirself if they were not from Basildon?

Answer 1

You need to learn to spell.....

Answer 2

A Chav is by popular definition a young oik or middle aged beer gutted man or woman with an unfortunate Mr T. fixation and the deluded belief that by donning vast quantities of gold they will blend into the crowd as they mug old ladies and breakinto cars to steal the required loot to buy that all important tin (BUT GOLD PLATED) chain that will transform them into an urban god.....

How to gain self knollage that one is a chav when one hails from beyond the borders of fair basildon?... ask the nice policeman out side your cell? ask the question...do people laugh at me as i walk down the street or do olde ladies pull out a taser or pepper spray as i approach? Do i exist on state handouts?

if any of the above apply then you are a chav... now take a blunt bread knife and kindly commit Sepuku.... (Jap ritual dissembowelment for all you chavs out there).

merry xmas

Answer 3

If they were seriously chav, that level of self-reflection would not occur. The labels that show chavianity (? Chav-ness?) are not deliberately adopted after contemplation.

They might just recognise others as being "like them." and group up instinctively, for example at England football matches, or at factory retail outlets*.

Chav: depending on your source, either "council house and violent" or from the Romany for "child".

*as in the mob riot at the opening of an Ikea store.

Answer 4

The West London Chav area is Feltham ...here is breaking news
from the area..........

A Major hurricane (Hurricane Shazza) and earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter Scale hit Feltham in the early hours of Friday with its epicentre in The Centre. Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering "Faaackinell".
The hurricane decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of damage.
Several priceless collections of mementos from Majorca and the Costa Del Sol were damaged beyond repair.
Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giros arrived. UK Garage FM reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered and were still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Feltham.
One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5 said. "It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying.
My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Victoria-Storm slept through it all, I was still shaking when I was skinning up and watching Trisha the next morning".
Apparently looting, mugging and car crime were unaffected and
carried on as normal.
The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny Delight to the area to help the stricken locals. Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, including benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.
HOW CAN YOU HELP?

This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for
those
unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is
most sought after - items most needed include:
Fila or Burberry baseball caps
Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)
shell suits (female)
White sport socks
Rockport Boots
Any other items usually sold in Primark
Food parcels may be harder to come by, but needed all the same.
Required foodstuffs include:
Microwave meals, Tins of Baked Beans, Ice Cream, Cans of Colt 45 or
Special Brew 22p buys a Biro for filling in the compensation forms.
£2 buys chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9.
£5 buys B & H and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected..
"BREAKING NEWS"
Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in raspberry alco-pop, "Where you bleeding from?" they asked, "Feltham" said the girl.
"wos that gotta do wiv you?"
Please don't forward this to anyone living in Basildon as they
will feel peed off that Feltham is now looking like Chav Capital of
UK

Answer 5

Not to worry. They'll always recognize their reflection in the loo-water when the throw-up.

Cheers, mate.

Answer 6

seeing themselves on little britain or maybe street crime uk!
or in their local news paper for beating a helpless person??

Answer 7

look in the mirror

Answer 8

k

Answer 9

I dunno., But please, can someone tell me what the initials "Chav" stand for? I have been wondering for so long - is it something to do with council houses?

Answer 10

they would be in plymouth