For those who think this isnt worth answering, no need to post an angry answer please.. just skip my question..
My exboyfriend and I are broken up for almost two years already. In the past two years he had been trying to come back to me but it just feels like he's ready and then he's not again until i got sick and nearly died that he became so persistent and so ready. Yet, the way i look at it he's still the same, he hasnt changed. He still doesn't care much, and now that he's vacationing in a different country, he hasn't even contacted me, and whenever i tell him to stop playing games with me, he would beg me to give him a chance and not totally close the door and so i would because i still love him and then again.. there he goes again.. he won't do anything to work it.. just letting time pass by.. it's a dilemma cause I love the guy but the way he's going on.. it seems that i have no place in his life..
2006-12-18 17:04:14 · 11 answers · asked by evismea 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I think you answered your own question. You have no place in his life. Hasn't he proven this by his vacillation over time? You say that you "love" him. Love is mutual, love is earned, love should never put you in a "dilemma." Pardon me for being non-professional--but he is "flip-flopping" at your expense. & so far, HE is comfortable in knowing you always give him another chance. You are enabling him to treat you in a very cavalier fashion. I think you deserve better than that. "...just letting time pass by." Think about that, & how precious time is. Love yourself FIRST, & I believe you'll free yourself from this person quickly. I often ask questions to explore someone's reasons for their behaviour, but you've stated enough, & clearly. Your "ex" boyfriend hasn't the constancy, stability, sensitivity, to be worth your time.
EDIT: I just looked at your answers, & most basically say what I was saying. They were very thoughtful, & very wise.
2006-12-18 17:23:07 · answer #1 · answered by Valac Gypsy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, you told him to not mess around with you by playing games. I'm guessing that this is a game. Now, I don't know much, but if a guy tells you that he'd be willing to change himself to get back with you, then he should do it. But because you said he hasn't changed even though he has, I'm guessing he's not gonna change for a while. If you love him, give him an alarm. Tell him that you're serious and you're gonna move on with or without him by your side. Tell him that you have much better things than playing stupid, immature games with him. In any way possible, follow your heart. That might sound cheesy xD
2006-12-19 01:10:17 · answer #2 · answered by Jennifer N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like you are giving someone love who clearly does not want it or value it! What more can you say? He does not give you anything to go on. He is an emotional roller coaster when it comes to you. Do you really want this? You know that you are never going to get the respect and real love from this individual that you deserve, don't you? He hasn't changed, he does not contact you, he apparently just knows that you are there to be used for the "love" you have for him. Tell him to leave you alone! You are being given this second chance to live. Live it for yourself. Don't give your love away to a cheap, lying, manipulative, insincere fool! Don't go into deep discussions as his actions speak well of themselves and cannot be explained away. Enjoy life! It is too short for idiots like him! Find real love!
2006-12-19 01:14:02 · answer #3 · answered by PZ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever read the book "He's Just Not That Into You"? I found it immensely helpful and I bought copies for my mom, sister, and all my close friends. It will help you know more than whether he's into you or not, it will also help YOU figure out EXACTLY what kind of man you want and EXACTLY how you want that man to treat you.
To be honest, this guy sounds like a gigantic piece of unworthy crap. Don't waste any more time with him. As the author of the book would say "don't waste the pretty."
2006-12-19 01:23:56 · answer #4 · answered by Jamie R 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My advice for you, don't waste your energy and love on someone who is not totally committed to you. You will see that when you stop thinking about him and look around you for a real person who will love you and give the attention and love you deserve, you will find that person. You are wasting your time with this guy, he will only appreciate you when he looses you, well it will be too late then.
2006-12-19 01:25:33 · answer #5 · answered by Dana N 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You see that nothing's changed with this man. You need to buck up and get out of this relationship once and for all. You said,
"I have no place in his life." Then get out of his life and find someone who wants to fit you into their life. Stop letting him back into your life. You have two choices: Continue on in a lousy "relationship" that's going nowhere fast, or end it and find someone who will care for you and treat you decently. Don't you think you deserve someone better than him?
2006-12-19 01:25:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Years ago I had a similar situation - he also kept me on the edge of loving him. I know you probably dont want to hear this but you need to try and keep away from him completely and give yourself some time to get over him.
2006-12-19 01:11:00 · answer #7 · answered by Aussie Girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i don't know... words don't really mean a thing. relationships shouldn't be based on words. rather, actions. if he loves you he need to act like it. saying so shouldn't mean a thing coz you people won't be happy at all and when you're married he'll do the same stuff while you're at home working three jobs and taking care of the kids. if you ask me, give him a chance to make it right. and if he doesn't DROP HIM. he's not worth it.
2006-12-19 01:10:58 · answer #8 · answered by BeautyBunny<3 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I promise to be nice ,you sound like you need a friend .
keep saying to yourself two years i been dealing with this ,I'm not sure if you in love or just don't know any better exist out there .
quit digging this hole deeper .
Find someone who deserves you .
2006-12-19 01:18:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would only life to say that if u chase the butterfly it will fly off. but if u ingnore it it will come & sit on our shoulder.
Try this method & see wheather it works But for that u have to be patient & stiff from heart. U will get ur goal.
2006-12-19 01:10:21 · answer #10 · answered by dilu 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋