Does the MISERY of being left ever go away?

Question

My husband left me and three small children to move three blocks away for anther woman. He is well known so I can't just not think of him. He is in the newspaper often. I hear about him and his new woman. I can't move home because it was destroyed in the hurricane that hit Mississippi. So I am stuck on the East Coast and want to die. Any help? Anyone?

Answer 1

Yes it does with time. I am sorry to hear that after Katrina you had to deal with this too. I saw the destruction first hand. The kids need you after these two disasters so try to hang in there for them. I promise it will get better with time.

Answer 2

it's been three years ago Christmas day, we had a nice home, a good life and a good job, but that day he just came home and said he wanted a divorce, i was devastated, but what i found out about her and the lies and the amount of time he had actually been seeing her, i went into this deep depression that nothing at all would shake. they had a place directly across the street from me, and he was working on it so that they could move in. the thought of seeing her and him was too much, the day of the divorce i left, moved far away, and began a new life. what helped me most was moving away, at least where u didn't have to see them anymore. we can't control others, when they hurt us, we just have to know it was not about us, but had to do with the person who hurt us. distance yourself, move away if at all possible, actually the misery doesn't go away but it diminishes alot, especially when one gets some spiritual help. in life there is always some kind of heartache, something to steal our joy. u need to get outa there and move somewhere else, where u aren't reminded of him and don't have to see him and the other woman. she stole something from u, something u loved and valued, and it does hurt, just move away if there is any way possible, as that will help u alot. u don't need a constant reminder of him and what he is doing all of the time.

Answer 3

Now that's terrible. I don't want you to feel really bad, but unfortunately it's going to be awhile before you will get over this situation. The only solution is for you to file for divorce, make sure you get good child support and alimony and go to a support group. You can also join a local parish, that have a very good family orientation.

If you are spiritual person, put your faith in the man above (if you believe in God). If your faith is strong you will heal and you will be able to deal with your ex and his new woman until you get you a new man. Just make sure he takes care of his children.

Answer 4

First, I am so sorry for your pain. I know how it feels to be crushed and heartbroken. On the up side, yes the misery does go away, but on the down side, it can take almost a life time. You will always have feelings for that person, no matter what, so just hearing the name is terrible. You have to be strong for the kids, don't let them tap into your pain, trust me kids can sense everything. Take care and stay strong. Find things(hobbies) to try to take your mind off the situation. It will take time.....
Good luck and keep your head up

Answer 5

I don't really have an answer, just lending my support. My husband of 9 years left me two weeks ago to move in with his mistress a few blocks away. I am devastated. I feel for you, and I am so sorry for the pain you feel. Go to counseling. . . please. You need to focus on yourself. You are worth it, and your kids need you. Please hang in there. You will learn that this is not your fault, and that you deserve to be treated better. Betrayal is the most painful of human emotions. See a counselor, and you will start to see that there is a bright side to this. Don't get me wrong. . . you need to feel everything you are feeling, and that may take some time. You are grieving. But you will be OK, and you will survive.

Answer 6

I know you are feeling sorry for yourself because you can't understand why he choose someone else over you but why would you waste your time over someone who obviously doesn't care about your feelings. He isn't worth it and there are others outthere deserving of your love

YES , IT DOES GET BETTER WITH TIME

Please, join a group for single parents. Many others have walked in your shoes, I for one .

You have to be strong and "pick yourself up by the boot straps".
This may sound cliche' but go out and get yourself a makeover, hair, makeup, clothes. When you look good you feel good!

Join online singles clubs for friendship and eventually casual dating. Find other single parents make friends. Sometimes your church and your children's school have groups to join.

Take a course in college or vocational school; go on that trip you always wanted to go on ... Are you getting the picture.?..

You are a wonderful person who deserves only the best and all the happiness in the world. Go for the gusto!

..

Answer 7

Turn your misery into RESULTS! Do something positive about your situation. Since he's well known, I dont imagine he'll appreciate his name being dragged thru divorce court, and custody hearings. And since he's that much of a community leader, he shouldnt have any problem paying child support AND alimony. Put your sorrow to work for YOU and YOUR CHILDREN.

Answer 8

I am so, so, so, so sorry. I know exactly what you're going through. I've been there recently and it's agonizing. I tend to let denial take over when things are too painful. It might not be smart, but it works. Ignorance is bliss.

I highly suggest moving, out of town or out of state.

Answer 9

Be strong miss tina, your children need you. Yes, you will get over it, but it takes time. That time speeds up when you decide for your self, that you are done with worrying about him and his drama. I wish I could send you a big o hug, I'm sorry for what you must be going through. Good luck, and again, stay strong

Answer 10

First of all, your 3 little children need you...dont forget that! If your husband took off, dont you take off cuz YOU are all those children have. Its hard, but you need to pick up and start a new life somewhere. Oviously this man is a prick and you dont need to put up with his ****! You need to start thinking about your CHILDREN and how they need YOU right now. You need to be happy for them. I think that anybody can do something they really want to do, and I think you really need to start fresh somewhere else..please, if you need to talk, email me, [e-mail] and I can help you out with resources and stuff!