ARGG men are confusing!?

Question

I want to know where to find a good man! Someone help me out here lol. Im not into the club scene or any of that matter. I want a man not a boy, and I don't want someone who is into games either. It is so hard for me to find a guy, I don't know what is wrong with me. I do come off a little shy sometimes, but...I don't know. And for the most part I am pretty confident in who I am. Where can a nice, genuine intelligent girl find a good man these days?!?

Answer 1

sadly, there's never really any sure shortcut. No where or how you can count on. Best advice I can give you is to be open to the possibility all the time and to trust you instincts, and never blow an opportunity because you didn't consider yourself to be in a place where you should be looking. And I mean everywhere.

The online stuff can work, but it can be really tough, too. You'll run into a lot of guys that have reduced seduction to a science and will use you, especially if the difficulty and duration of your search has made you vulnerable to something in their bag of tricks.

No easy way. Sometimes it just comes down to the luck of the draw. You can improve your odds a lot by just keeping your eyes and ears open - all the time. But even doing that doesn't provide anything even resembling a guarantee.

Same as it always ways. Very few people that are unnattached at the moment can claim to have not felt gypped by that reality, but what can we do except keep trying, like fools?

Answer 2

The best way to find a good partner, is to find a good group of people first. Usually clubs and bars don't meet this criteria. If you find people who for the most part share your belief's, then a partner may come from this group, or join the group that you are already in. Finding a new friend should be your first priority and then the partner thing will just happen on its own.

Answer 3

I find people in your position tend to wait for that perfect person. Problem is, there are no perfect people. I don't care how perfect you think someone is, sooner or later you will discover a flaw or two that you might not ever of guessed at.
The other side of that coin is that the flaws that you see right off the bat when you meet someone, might just be one of very few flaws, and you may be looking at the person that ultimately does it for you.
The one sure sign that I think you need to look for is loyalty. Those little signs that say, no matter how bad things get this person will stand by you.
My wife has one of those. Why can I say that? Because she just did a stint in the psychiatric ward, and was amazed that I was still there when she came out.
When you make a vow, you stick by it!

Answer 4

Hi,

I'm a good man!

I come across here as a bit arrogant and opinionated but I'm not at all..

Good men are everywhere.. literally.. beautiful girls like you always miss them because you either expect them to make some magical entrance.. or you act too cool to be approachable.. or the guy is just too damn shy to talk to you.. which is usually my problem with girls..

I think it's no one's fault though.. so many fears in society.. people arent as friendly .. I try smile at people a lot.. maybe you should smile at guys who seem nice ot you and see if they have the courage ot approach you after that.. I know if you smiled at me without seeming desperate.. i would definately make the effort to say soemthing charming in introducing myself..

and sometimes.. a guy will fall in love with you when you are absolutely yourself.. like down at the laudry cursing about a faulty washing machine.. while you have rollers in your hair.. lol.. some guys love ot care for a girl who is obviously passionate and hard working.. even if life seems a struggle.. it's kinda fun to a guy to work from zero to building a moutain with a girl.. guys dream of "doing it together".. guys like to see that a girl has some fighting qualities .. spirit.. this will be a major appeal to many guys.. and they'll come out of the cracks when you show it..

I know if I met a woman who was a bit frazzled but I could see she had a lot of heart.. whether she was a doctor or a nurse.. wouldn't matter.. the fact she shows heart would definately spur me to at the very least smile or make some comment ..

When I see a girl hanging with a group of girls, drinking together.. all dressed in mini skirts and ultra radical fashions.. it's very off putting, intimidating and even though a million guys are looking.. only the ones desperate enough to risk total rejection will approach you.. and ultimately get their way.. the good ol one nighter.. not my thing..

If you want ot meet a really nice guy, with the package.. then just be yourself.. and drop the makeup, short skirts and loose morals.. as this will only ever attract desperados, serial philanderers and ultimately you will marry one..

BE NATURAL!! be yourself.. be silly if you feel silly.. be happy if you are happy.. and sad even if you are sad.. guys love a woman who is not afraid to be herself at all times.. because the most important thing ot a man.. is TRUST!

Good luck.. :-)

Answer 5

in all actuality most if not all men are dirt bags....trust me i seen the worst in every guy i meet... to answer your question finding a good guy takes time and Chance...for example we could be 100% compatible but we would never work out because maybe the time isn't right or you might think Yahoo answer guys are creepy... the only advice that i can give is maybe joining a local sports team... something like in a public league sponsored by your local park.... the reason i say this is that most guys have a lot of things on their minds but when your playing sports you stop worrying about being all wound up and you just be yourself!!!

Answer 6

I think when you're busy doing the things you enjoy, you'll meet like-minded people. You say you are a bit shy and sometimes you just have to break out of your shell and just be approachable. It sounds trite, but when you least expect it always seems that is when someone comes along. Sometimes you have to look with fresh eyes at guys you might have over-looked in the past. Quite often the "good" ones are right under your nose.

Answer 7

Sorry, women are confusing also. For every plus/minus of "men", you can find a matching or mirror image one in "women".

Like someone else here said, relax, do what you like to do. I think somewhere along the line if you are doing things you like to do you'll run into someone else who might have some simpatico with you.

I think it's better to be alone than to form a relationship with the wrong person. Even cranky, weird ol' me eventually came across someone to love, after so many mistakes and years wasted. She's the best, and returns my love. I hope you find someone about whom you feel the same.

Answer 8

Forget the club scene. The men you meet there, you don't want to bring home.
What are your interests? Join a club with similar interests (they should be in your newspaper). The people you meet there automatically have something in common with you. Let nature go from there. All you have to do is get into a setting where you can sit comfortably with men. Men, being what they are (animals on the hunt) should take it from there.

Answer 9

6 years ago I wouldn't have said this. Try a good internet dating sight. I recommend match.com. Be truthful about yourself and your interest and look for a match. Checking out a guys "resume" before you waste a bunch of time trolling is a really great idea. Then relax and be yourself, the right guy will find you.

Answer 10

ROFL@"good man" isn't that the oxymoron of all time? j/k :P

I think you have to look for the guy that will compliment your abilities in terms of intellect, emotions and skills. You should find someone to...ugh...i hate this phrase, but it's so true...to complete you. A relationship should be about a partnership where both people have their needs met in a way that's conducive to the relationship growing.