whats the right time for my son to go to bed on a school night?

Question

He is 12, 13 in March and he wants to stay up later that he does now. I put him to bed at 9.45 on a school night but he wants to go to bed later. What time do yours go to bed?

Answer 1

thats freaky it sounds like me im 12 and ill be 13 in march. anyway,i got to bed between 10:00-10:30

Answer 2

When I was 12 (I'm 14 now) I went to bed at like 9:00-9:30. I couldn't go any later I had to get up too early. Now that I'm 14 I'm in bed by 10 and usually just keep my tv on till 10:30 or even 11 when I really can't sleep. But my bedtime is supposed to be 10. I have to get up though every morning at 6-6:30. So that is enough time for me it's like 7 1/2 to 8hours. I guess it should just depend on when he has to get up. I mean try like 10 with him for a little bit and if he gets up every morning just fine then that's an okay time.

Answer 3

Well, im suppose to go at 11:00 but some nites i don't go to bed till 12:00 1:00 in the morning. If he wants to stay up a little later then let him stay up till 10:00 or 10:30.

Answer 4

I believe that when I was 13, my mother let me stay up until 10:30. It seems reasonable enough to me. If you're worried about him getting enough sleep for school see how 10 pm works out. It's only an extra 15 minutes but it will probably make him feel more grown-up to think "I have to be in bed at 10" vesus 9:45.

Answer 5

It's not about a specific time, it's about what he needs. He is around the sort of age that he is becoming able to judge for himself when he needs to go to bed, but ultimately you "still know best". Well at least you are responsible for his bedtime anyway.

As teens age they naturally need to go to bed later and later. By the time they are late teens their body clock won't want them to shut down until way after midnight. That is normal, and it is far more to do with how "developed" your teen is than when is a socially appropriate time.

If you let him stay up and he starts to get over tired in the mornings then you know it was the wrong decision, but I have to say 9:45 doesn't sound very late to me.

I suspect the timing is related to two things, one is TV and the other is his friends. Unfortunately these aren't good measures with which to determine what is the best time.

However, if a conflict over bed times is all you need to worry about with him then firstly you have done a good job of bringing him up so far, but things are going to change soon, and that means your approach needs to aswell.

PLEASE let him grow up at his own pace. Of course be aware of what is influencing him and try to gently steer him away if necessary but it's a tightrope. You duty as a parent is to try and help him turn himself into a decent adult human being. Determining his bedtime is far too much control in my opinion, although if he is a very young (underdeveloped) 12/13 then maybe the time to let him start to grow up hasn't quie arrived yet.

Good luck

Answer 6

I have a 15 year old and on school nights he is in bed for 10 so I think you are right with your time

Answer 7

I was in bed by 930 until i was about 15, I'm 18 now and go to bed by 12 on school nights...it depends on what time he has to get up and stuff.

Answer 8

10 to 10:30

Answer 9

im 13 and go to bed at 11- BUT i can be woke up easily
it depends on if he is cranky in the morning at 9:45 if he is cranky earlier if not maybe 10:00 to 10:30

also it depends on what time does he have to get up for school
i get up at 6:00 am school by 7:00 to 7:30

Answer 10

My little girls 7 and I put her to bed at 7:30pm If i had a 12/13 year old, I think 9:30 is late enough on a school night... good luck in trying to convince him, but remember, you're in charge, what you say goes! x