LOL...sounds crazy, right? I started dating my boyfriend several months ago. He was at the end of the 1 year seperation required by SC law before a divorce can be granted. His ex was going to go to his lawyer, sign the papers, and they were going to be done with it. Ever since she found out that he is dating someone new (me:-) she has announced she "is not signing ****" (classy, huh?) and that she is taking him to court, is out for blood, custody of the 2 kids, and money. He and I don't want to do it and don't want to lie to the kids, but we are considering staging a break up...him telling her he failed at his relationship with me and that we are no longer together so she will calm down and sign. Several months later she will find out we "got back together". Is this crazy? Bad idea? Good idea? Advice please and thank you!
2006-12-18 08:34:17 · 14 answers · asked by Jennifer L 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I've been there done that..... It really isn't going to matter what you do or say if she wants the fight she will do it no matter what happens. She is hurt and upset that he may have found happiness in another woman's arms. My ex-husband did the same thing to me for 8 years and they only reason behind it was that he didn't like the thought of another man acting as her father and that I never seemed that happy with him. BUT if your man thinks it will work (he should know his ex-wife) then go for it. It just didnt work for me.
2006-12-18 09:19:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Other than falsifying the reality, its a pretty ingenious plan as long as she doesnt find out the truth or check out this website. I am a strong believer in "always better to tell the truth" , but after reading this I think it could actually work for you two but please be prepared just in case she gets hold of the truth as it will then turn terribly wrong against you two. I guess you could say youre only playing the game at her level. The more I think about it it is really a good plan to achieve the divorce, but please leave the kids out of this plan so they cant get hurt if anything goes wrong. Good luck and Merry Christmas
2006-12-18 08:54:19 · answer #2 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bad idea, because you have no guarantee that this strategy will work.
She is obviously upset because, from her point of view, he broke a promise to her - she probably thinks he left her for you, was cheating on her, promised not to see anyone until the divorce was final, etc. So the damage is probably already done, and pretening to break up won't make her feel better.
So if you and your bf work to resolve THAT issue, then maybe she'll calm down. He should ask her WHY she is suddenly so upset, and what she feels has changed since their last agreement.
2006-12-18 08:42:31 · answer #3 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may depend on the state you live in. In the great state of Texas, if he can contest the divorce. Even though he signed an uncontested document, he just has to show up to court, the judge will ask him what the Hell he's doing there and then he can say he changed his mind. My advice, is lie to him about the court date, since he signed the papers when you filed them they should assign you a date, tell him it is a week later, then bring him the final decree. He doesnt have to sign it if he already signed the uncontested decree
2016-05-23 05:04:44 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was this HIS idea? If it was then DON"T do it ! If your in the State of Texas he could get a no fault divorce without her signature but I guess ya'll don't live in Texas? I would ask an Attorney. You could even find this out yourself. Some Attorneys have a FREE consultation the first visit..
2006-12-18 08:50:47 · answer #5 · answered by CryBaby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say stage a breakup. Do what ever you have to do for the two of you to get some peace. I was in a similar situation and believe me, the best thing for the two of you to do is appease her until she signs on that line. Everyone will be happier b/c of it.
2006-12-18 08:42:39 · answer #6 · answered by luvjoydiver 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do what you got to do to get those papers signed, of course, since they have been apart for the mandatory year, he could just go to the judge and explain the situation and the judge could grant the divorce wether she wants it or not.
2006-12-18 08:41:37 · answer #7 · answered by bigbro3006 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a good idea but.....Okay so what if she doesn't sign the papers after you go through the trouble of staging a breakup?
2006-12-18 08:38:27 · answer #8 · answered by ♥Mizz.Purdy♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well for one why are you going to let someone who acts this way get away with that. What happens when you break up and she doesn't sign and when he starts seeing you again, opps here we go again. Your bf is the one who needs to tak her to court. ANd tell teh judge what she is doing and maybe she will be put in contemp of court. And then you have her in the palm of your hand.
2006-12-18 08:40:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he has to take care of the kids whether he likes it or not. and i wouldnt do that. if i were him i would make it clear that nothing is changing. now unless he fuckkked up in the past and she can hold something against him i would suggest a stage act.
2006-12-18 08:37:35 · answer #10 · answered by prettysexycalves 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋