A very close frien of mine has for the last 18 months been a frequent user of cocaine. She is now 5 months pregnant and i have just found out she is still using. Im so torn as to what to do...
Do i confront her and try to help her or do i just ignore it and see it as none of my business?
im so dissapointed in her.xxx
2006-12-18 08:16:54 · 31 answers · asked by punkydorieme 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I would totally say something to her, maybe she needs help but needs someone to lead her to it. I would never be able to hold my tongue in a situation like that. If she delivers a drug addicted child, she could possibly be held accountable for child abuse. Please don't stay quiet, do whatever you can to make the situation better. #1 is that poor defenseless baby.
2006-12-18 08:21:03 · answer #1 · answered by sunny_day_grl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Confront her....have an intervention. She needs help desperately. She can kill the baby! I know she probably thinks that won't happen to her, but it will....she will cause that child so much pain in life. Print her out picture of what babies look like that are born to mothers who use cocaine and other drugs while they are pregnant. Then print her some articles about behavior and mental disorders of babies who had mother who used drugs. Also tell her that it is not only her that will have to go through withdrawals, but the baby will have to as well when they are born, and most don't live through it. If she won't listen, then just leave the literature somewhere where she can read it, then leave numbers of help centers where she can call.
She needs to do this to help herself....and most of all the little one inside her who doesn't chose to have this happen to him or her.
I will pray for you to find the strength to help your friend and will pray for her strength as well to get away from drugs.
2006-12-18 16:44:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would inform Child Services NOW that she is still using at 5 months pregnant. When she gives birth, they will take the baby and test the child for drugs. If there are drugs in the baby's system, the child will be taken from her. She should IN NO WAY be able to keep this baby. If she doesn't care enough about the child now, then how is she going to be when the child is born?!? This is VERY serious, and should be taken care of NOW!!! The friendship you have with this person in NO WAY should out weigh the health and well being of her unborn child!
2006-12-18 16:33:04 · answer #3 · answered by One Race The Human Race 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is hard! Sorry you have this burden. If I were you I would put the interest of her baby in heart. I don't know if there are any help groups that you can find but maybe you should do some research on what happens to infants and new borns that are crack babies and maybe try to find a facility near you that takes care of only new borns on drugs and bring her there to see what she is doing to her unborn child, she is taking it's chance of survival away from it. Don't tell her you are dissapointed she is depressed already, just let her know that you love her and her baby and you know that she loves her baby too and you just want to get them both help.
I will pray for you, your friend and the baby
God Bless!
2006-12-18 16:29:31 · answer #4 · answered by rnavarro 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Difficult one, It is your bussiness and I would confront her as she is risking the life of the child.
I would put it to her like this. If you dont stop using your child is going to be born with an addiction and will be putting the childs life on hold and causing trouble for herself in the future, that is if they dont take the child away from her as soon as it is born.
This is totally un responcible I think you shold do somthing. Talk to her first if that dosn't work, tell the father maybe? The girls mother? You have a responcibility to inform someone the child is at risk.
2006-12-19 09:20:47 · answer #5 · answered by monkey-nuts 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her healthcare providers need to know this. If she is using regularly, she is risking premature birth and stillbirth, and even if her baby is born at full term, it may be born addicted and have to go through withdrawal at birth. If this is not done under medical supervision it could be dangerous, as well as highly unpleasant, for the baby.
If you confront her, you risk losing her as a friend. If you don't, you risk her child starting life with serious problems. Personally I think that this is a child protection issue which should be drawn to the attention of Social Services.
2006-12-18 18:22:24 · answer #6 · answered by purplepadma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
using drugs while pregnant is a very selfish thing to do...i would confront her and try to make her understand the consequences of her actions. she may not listen because cocaine users don't care about anyone or anything. but don't give up on her...especially for her unborn childs sake.
good luck
2006-12-18 16:41:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to get professional help. By this point she will need to be taken off the drugs by a doctor. They will have to take in the consideration of the baby and its needs. If she continues the baby will be what some call a "crack" baby. When the baby is born, it will have many problems because it will also have the drug addiction. The baby will go through what mom will go through too.
2006-12-18 16:26:35 · answer #8 · answered by Cadillac 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you have to do something, although perhaps not confront her. Explain why you are worried then offer help instead, like to see the midwife with her and get her the help she needs. Confrontation will surely only alienate her, when she needs you more than ever.
You sound like a good friend, I hope this story has a happy ending...
2006-12-18 17:54:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I woudl confront her...however...she will ost likely tell you to butt out. If she wanted to quit doing that, she would have gotten help by now (in my opinion), or came to you in search of options to help herself. Although most people know the dangers of drug use and pregnancy (not to mention drug use when not pregnant even)...she may not realize that this is reality for her! So I woudl just confront her and make sure she is aware of the potentially VERY dangerous situation she is creating, and hwo unfair it is to her baby!
Good luck...
2006-12-18 16:22:17 · answer #10 · answered by Kelly J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋