Why don't people leave "well enough alone"...my husband was in a fatal accident over 20 years ago??/now people

Question

i run into at the store of whereever...will undoubtedly BRING IT UP???? I feel that is insensitive??? i mean it has been 20 years...?? hello! so i just say politely ..."i do NOT relive it anymore"...would you get that? or are they TRYING TO MAKE YOU DEPRESSED?...(Don't work they provided a counselor and we have "let go"...)...But some people will not LET IT GO? and it is starting to make our FAMILY ANGRY!!!

Answer 1

People in general are just plain DUMB! Although their intentions are usually pretty good at heart. Maybe you should be on a mission to train the general population. How about an answer like, "How odd that you would bring that up, That happened so long ago."

Answer 2

Oh truly, what she did develop into disgusting! there is truly no reason you may could relive some thing like that. you opt for to maintain in ideas your husband for the finished ideas you've mutually. honestly, what's her difficulty? What she attempting as an example off in the front of her buddies. She must have allow you to recognize that she develop into inviting different human beings to lunch, its merely uncomplicated courtesy. It develop into type of the different 2 human beings to no longer aspect out some thing, of direction they were very much shocked by technique of her rudeness and didnt recognize what to assert. i'd be calling her and telling her that you're not any further inspired. If she receives annoyed about you announcing that then stuff her because of direction she has no idea what that is opt for to be you and doesnt keep in mind that her rudeness isn't some thing shared by technique of you or some thing of the community. She had no reason to elevate what she did, no individual else had their husbands or boyfriends there. You definately favor to inform her that that type of behaviour isn't on. you've the right on your privateness and to have your human beings appreciate that.

Answer 3

They probably just don't know what else to say. These are probably people who haven't talked to you since it happened, so that is the first thing they think of. People don't intentionally try to depress other people as a rule. As insensitive as it may seem to you, they are just trying to tell you they care and strike up a conversation, they don't know they are being insensitive.

I am sure this is irritating, but try to be patient with them and realize they just care.

Answer 4

Sometimes people don't know what to say, so they bring up inappropriate things instead of just asking how you and family doing and leave it at that. You are right it is insensitive and none of their business. You can be polite and just walk away from them.

Answer 5

I know I can be hard to deal with people doing that to you.But I don't think it is because they are trying to be inconsiderate.I think that in their minds they are trying to tell you that they still care.You should know has well has anyone that the way our lost loved ones live on is in our hearts and our memories.And some people don't know how to express that especially if they haven't lost someone them selves so they keep bringing things like your husbands death up has a way to express their remembrance of him.

Answer 6

tell them you've moved on, just as your husband would have wanted. you loved him but you know your husband wants you to be happy. no need to be sad after 20 years. just tell them that. its been a long time and no need to bring up the past, just keep on looking upfront

Answer 7

I lost my husband four years ago....I have a new husband and my mom is having a fit because we don't do things the way she would them done.....My sister is the same way. People let go in their own time......Be patient......They don't know any better. They miss him and "check-in" with you.......

Answer 8

Tell them it is over you have gotten over it and to drop it or stop talking to you I lost a son DEC 24 1989 i know what you are talking about. Tell them to drop it.