I have been with my partner 20 years and we have 7 year old daughter together.I have asked him to marry me 4 times but he finds some excuse not too.What do you think?
2006-12-18 06:58:06 · 23 answers · asked by Nookie bear 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Some people live together just fine for long periods of time without marrying but since it is something that you really want I think he should consider it, especially after 20 yrs. I dont know maybe you should give him a choice between marriage or nothing, If you are willing to take that chance. But before you do that, you should have a talk with him about why you want to get married.
Me and my boyfriend (dont you just hate saying boyfriend?) have been together for 6 yrs with a 5 yr. old but we are only 23 so we are taking our time with the whole getting married thing.
2006-12-18 07:06:47 · answer #1 · answered by Nolagirl83 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that your partner is comfortable with the way your relationship is right now, and believe it or not some men will stay with you but are afraid to take that step towards marriage. Practically you are already married, but not on paper. I hate to say this but you might also look into whether you are the only one he is with, because that may very well be the cause of why he hasn't ask you to marry him yet. I would say this though give him some time and see if he will come around, but be careful, because I would hate for you to feel like you are forcing him into marriage and you end up pushing him away.
2006-12-18 15:34:33 · answer #2 · answered by ryvetteus2 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well he probably doesnt believe in marriage, like Johnny Depp. Being committed in your relationship is all that matters. porbably believes that a piece of paper does not mean a thing, just what the heart believes. you've been together for 20 years and have a daughter. people who get married at times dont even get to last that long. just ask for his point of view really. take it from there. respect his views of marriage.
2006-12-18 15:47:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you told him you have been feeling like this all along? You should have a feeling why he doesn't want to marry you, being together that long you should be able to read his emotions. If you two have grown apart in areas try to re-connect. If he still doesn't want to marry you after you have sat down and talked it all out and laid it all on the table, then I would have to say move on with your life with your daughter. She doesn't need to see that her Father isn't 'in love enough' to marry her Mom. She needs your love and support so that she doesn't end up in a bad relationship looking for love that she'll never get completely.
2006-12-18 15:10:53 · answer #4 · answered by Karen A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find out why he is so scared of marriage. Some people are just flat scared of it. If you have been together this long without the "papers" and are happy, he may be afraid that making it legal will hurt your relationship. Many people feel this way. But, to get the real answer to this question, you are going to have to get it from him. Be understanding and don't push him. It sounds like you have a good thing like it is.
2006-12-18 15:04:07 · answer #5 · answered by PDH 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
20 years together? What would be the point. You stayed for 20 years. Accept what you have and enjoy the rest of your lives together. He's not going anywhere and niether are you so move on to something more important like where you are going on your next vacation.
2006-12-18 15:13:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
After 20 years, accept the fact that he will never marry you.
2006-12-18 15:03:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
He's probably thinking, "why buy the milk when he has the cow at home". Hope I didn't sound too harsh. But, if you want to be married, you better start looking for someone else.
2006-12-18 15:04:08 · answer #8 · answered by valedictorian13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that is kind of odd. There is no reason in your situation that your partner shouldn't want to get married unless they have someone on the side, which isn't cool. Tell them you want a real reason, and want real commitment, and if he doesn't want that, he's not worth it for you or your daughter.
2006-12-18 15:01:15 · answer #9 · answered by Erin* 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Is marriage that important to you? If it is then explain it to your partner and let him know why it is important. If he does not want to marry you find out why he doesn't. If you can not meet on this issue then maybe you should leave him. He may not be as serious as you about your relationship.
2006-12-18 15:01:06 · answer #10 · answered by Mystic 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋