Do you believe there is a stereotype of single mothers?

Question

It is obvious that some people, mainly older men, have a stereotype of single mothers. Certain Canadian politicians and CEOs come to mind as making bizarre and unfounded comments in order to discredit this segment of the female population.
Although a single mother could be educated, intelligent, and have a high work ethic, she could still be a target by others trying to justify their own prejudices.
My question to you is when you are talking a single mother, whether she is divorced or has never been married, what is your behaviour toward her? Do you pity her, do you admire her, or do you despise her?

It is interesting to note that, so far, within the last 20 minutes the most derogatory comments such as 'on welfare', 'lazy slob', and 'easy sex' have all been made by men. It seems the women are much more empathetic. So far, anyway.

Answer 1

Admire,

it's not easy to be a single mother and raise, actual decent respecting children.

My boyfriends sister is a single mom, and her two kids are so wise for their age, her 5 year old was showing a full grown man how to work a camera phone.
Her two kids are beautiful, and not just smart, but Wise too. I give single mother's a HUGE ammount of respect, they could have been like the dead beat dad and gave their kids up. but htey didn't, they stuck around for their baby, that's more than the dad's could say.

Answer 2

Single mothers are single for many reasons. Some are divorced, some never married, some separated, some widowed. People are quick to judge single mothers as irresponsible, but that is a gross generalization. Being a single mother is hard work. There is no one there to help with the dishes or the laundry or holiday decorating or shoveling snow. There is no one there to watch the kids if you need to go out somewhere. Money is always tight. Although, of course, there are some who abuse the system, that is true of people in all situations from all walks of life. And no...I am not a single mother, but I know many, and most of them are hard-working and responsible and trying to make do with the little they have. It is not an easy life, and the stereotyping done by many people certainly doesn't help. People are always quick to judge others when they themselves have never been in that particular situation.

Answer 3

First of all, I am a Long-Term Single Mother (who just became an Empty-Nesting Single Retiree). I raised my TWO Disabled children ALONE with only my income and benefits to support them (Because the ex was a Deadbeat in the truest sense of the word -- and he also was convicted of abusing them too).

That said -- before the short disaster of a marriage .. I was already a working Professional ... I EARNED My Ugrad and Grad Degrees (by paying for the costs of my education myself). I entered the Military Service (USA) so that I could earn those degrees.

I continued in the Service (and earned multiple professional certifications), had my children, then became a Single Parent while on Active Duty. From that point onwards -- it was just me providing everything for them.

I continued to work, deploy, go TDY, until my Military Retirement ... and continued to be their sole income source and caregiver.

I HAVE Experienced the Prejudice, the UGLY Remarks about being a Single Parent FIRST HAND -- all the curses, the put-downs, the constant remarks by those who DO NOT KNOW what it takes to be SINGLE and a Parent. I've had to explain how (and PROVE -- if I was a MAN I would NEVER have had to do this) I could continue to keep working and make my commitments ... and (sometimes) I was also scheduled to work for a "male" who had to take his spouse/child to a doctor for a cold. I had to take Leave/Vacation Time to take my children to the hospital for Neurological Evaluations, X-Rays, MRIs and the like -- whereas my male peers did not even have to take any.

I KNOW intimately the STRUGGLE Each and every single mom has every day -- I am also a homeowner -- so all that work lay on MY Shoulders too. Believe me, when you round your home to confront a soliciting salesperson (with gas chainsaw in your hands) you SCARE and shock them into stupid things -- like ... "I've never seen a little lady ..." (How little am I at 5' 7.5"!)

I know what it means to shop for groceries during your Lunchtime (and have them in coolers in the trunk), I know what it is like to have to do laundry, dishes, fixing meals for the next day until 1-2 AM in the morning .. then having to wake up between 4:30 to 5:30 AM. I know what it means to drain the oil, replace the filter, and change the blades on my lawn tractor. I mow my lawn, I pay my taxes, and still ...

when I go to a store these ignorant comments appear (from those who never had to experience this situation of single parenthood).

Answer 4

I know several single moms and personally I admire each of them. All work very hard to provide a good loving environment for their children. All are very careful with whom they associate where men are concerned and none of them are willing to put their expectations for life before the happiness of their children.

They are all very involved in their childrens schools, some of them work two jobs, another is also taking care of her very ill elderly mother, refusing to put her into a home and wanting to ensure her last days are happy ones.

My admiration, awe and love for each of these women is always evident...but then, I am able to separate the stigma society places on almost everything and decide for myself who and what I might not accept...there's very little I feel that I have the right to put down and I try very hard to look at everything with an open mind.

Answer 5

My view of single mothers comes from my mother. Between the time she and my father divorced and several years later when she remarried, she worked hard to keep a decent roof over the head my brother and me. I've dated single mothers. Some, honestly, were better mothers than others but every woman I have dated who has a child worked hard to give that the best that they could.
Anyone who puts down single mothers is worthless in my book.

Answer 6

I don't behave in a particular way toward them, but as to whether or not there are stereotypes, it's hard to say. I define a stereotype as a characteristic that is widely believed to be held by a particular class of people. I think any stereotypes of single mothers would be hard-working, and stressed. Personal experience with single-mothers could change that perception from one person to the next. If I had a close relative that was a single mother, and she was a lazy slob who always blamed other people for her problems, my opinion of single mothers might change.

***NOTE: PLEASE READ MY ANSWER IN ENTIRITY BEFORE GIVING ME A THUMBS DOWN OR SAYING I'M BEING DEROGATORY. I HAVE NOT CHANGED MY ORIGINAL ANSWER EXCEPT TO ADD THIS NOTE.***

Answer 7

I was a single mother at one point. It's very unfortunate the stereotypoes that exist. It seems to me that everyone feels sorry for a single mom, assuming she is very poor and unstable, and very unhappy. (Not always the case.) I think a single mother is stronger than your average woman. I've been there, and know that I am now stronger from the wisdom I gained from being a single mother.

Answer 8

My mum raised 4 kids by herself and did a wonderful job of it. Yes there is a sterotype.

I respect single mothers trying to make it, especially if they have chosen not to be with an abusive husband and left him because he was an idiot, men can be such idiots to women and children, trust me I know

Answer 9

Depends on the circumstances.

For example if the single mother had 3 kids from 3 different fathers and was on welfare, I'd probably despise her.

Or, if the single mother's husband died and was doing her best to provide for the children, I'd admire her.

Answer 10

Society, people in general do stereotype single mothers and other "categories". If a person is a good, dedicated, kind, loving, caring person to her child provides the necessities and more if possible,teaches them proper values, manners, etc...... I admire them.