Is it just me??

Question

Is it just me or is christmas depressing??? My parents are divorced, and my dad has split up with his girlfriend. All there is going to be is 2 houses: my mum, me and ma brother, and then my dad, me, my brother and my grandma. I don't find it easy to get excited about christmas. theres too much hype. Also, my dad split up with his girlfriend last christmas, like around that time, and I found out that my mum started having an affair around christmas. so it doesn't seem such an enjoyable time. Every christmas, I have had a full family, or a "full family". eiter been my proper family, or my dads girlfriend that was like a second mum to me. Now it's going to be different, probably not for the better. Does anybody else see christmas as an unhappyish time???

Answer 1

I'm so sorry about your family...I can imagine the hurt you've gone through around Christmas. Try reading the Bible, especially the gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John), and maybe Christmas will come to mean more to you as you learn about Jesus and what He did on earth.

God Bless!

Answer 2

Hey Buddy, I hear ya. Christmas has not been the happiest for me either. But I have learned some things, maybe they will help you.

I was really negative about Christmas, and often still am. I try to think of the small good things that happens around that time. Such as...you get to spend it with your brother. If he is a little brother, you being there with him probably mean a lot to him. If he is a big brother, you being with him helps to keep him going.

You get two different sets of Christmas Presents. Your parents most likely don't necessarily get along, so.. they are probably trying to get you guys the best presents. Play on that. Tell one parent that you think the other parent is getting you an amazing gift, and tell them how much you love the other parent (without making them feel too badly of course) this will make the parent want to buy an awesome gift. Do that with both parents.

If you hate spending time with your mom and dad for Christmas, then don't. Tell them that you rather do something else for Christmas, such as help serve food at the Shelter. Don't let them say yes or no, just tell them that is what you will be doing. I promise that after you see the people that live in the shelters you will be thankful for the small things in life.

I hope you have a Merry Christmas. I know that this can be a hard time. Just remember the little things that make you happy, and don't think about the holiday too much.

Answer 3

try to make the best of it. i know exactly how you feel. my parents split up at christmas when i was a child and my partner and i split up at christmas last year. this year will be my first without seeing his children.
i am determined to make the best of it this year. i have made completely different plans this year so christmas will be spent with people i have not spent it with before, and also i am being a little bit selfish and actually doing what i want to do as opposed to whats expected of me.
try and see friends as well as family or just set aside some 'you' time to watch whatever you want or read or just keep out of the way of anything that makes you unhappy or uncomfortable.

i really love christmas & for a long time i felt resentful that it had been ruined for me but i'm slowly coming back round to the idea of christmas, i am looking forward to seeing my niece & nephew opening their presents and that should cheer me up.

at the end of the day its only a couple of days out of the year, keep your head down and get through it the best you can, i hope you start to feel better after christmas - new year, new start :-)

Answer 4

Firstly, let me say how sad I am that you've been through so much this past year.

I know what you mean. I've had my share of health problems these past few years and Christmas is the hardest time of all, and I feel like I've let everyone down if i'm not full of christmas cheer.
It's always difficult to try to be happy when you don't feel happy. There's too much expectation on everybody to be 'merry' at christmas these days.

Try not to worry, be as happy or as sad as you want to be. Try not to have many expectaions, good or bad, and take it as it comes.

I once heard some advice on This Morning from agony aunt Denise Robertson, 'If you can't have a merry Chritmas this year, have a peaceful one'.

Take care

Answer 5

Awww I'm sorry. But you can always be grateful that you have a family to spend Christmas with. My past couple Christmas's haven't been so hot either. My family seems to just not want to come out and rejoice together anymore! For example, at Thanksgiving, there were only 11 of us. One didn't count because she was my cousin's girlfriend!! Lazy, I tell ya!! Don't worry...I'm sure it'll all work out well. Good luck and Happy Holidays!

Answer 6

The emotions for people in the situation you are in at this time of the year must be very hard. I can get very angry at parents who never give a thought to their childrens lives when they decide to divorce...I have 7 Grandchildren from my 3 Children and they all have this situation to deal with....I cry with them especially Christmas Eve when they are with one parent and want too see the other.....Please try and be brave and rise above your feelings knowing that the next day you will see the other parent...I know it's hard but I do wish you a very Happy Christmas

Answer 7

Christmastime can definitely be complicated, what with all the different combinations of blended families that people have these days. Trust me, it gets even more complicated when you get older and suddenly you have to work your spouse's family into the mix somehow, too. But please do me a favor and remember that Christmas isn't really about all this nonsense about who has dinner with whom, and who gets presents and who doesn't- try to think about one lovely memory you have of each of these family members you mentioned and hold it in your heart even when things start to get difficult. This really is a beautiful time of year if you can just think about each of your family members as nice individual people who you love, instead of remembering how it used to be when you were all together on Christmas. Wishing you the merriest of Christmases from USA!

Answer 8

You are not alone. Many people see Christmas as a sad, lonely time. I am sorry you are feeling this way. I recommend that you use the season as an opportunity to serve others -- I think that helping others might provide just the kind of fulfillment you are looking for from Christmas.

Answer 9

It sounds as if you have fallen down the rabbit hole and are in wonderland. Everything is just getting curiouser and curiouser. There is more to Christmas than rowing and fighting. Have patience, things will change and pass, they always do. If you are not an adult yet, at least try and say to yourself, my life is not going to be like this when I grow up. Make sure it doesn't! Good luck.

Answer 10

your not alone, but then again, at least you have some family, even if you have to run around like a blue arsed fly to visit them, dont bother reading the bible, thats just plain stupid lol, try really hard to have a good time, im sure it will be a lot better than you think, and maybe next year will be even better, this is going to be the first xmas in my family where we wont be having the company of a loved that lost her battle to cancer in the summer and its going to be sad, we will all be thinking of her, as she was the light and soul of everything, just try and be happy xxx

Answer 11

My parents were divorced and so was my x husbands sow e always had 4 xmas's to go to. By the time we were done running we were broke exhausted and in a fight ourselves. I HATE Christmas and have decided from now on to celebrate Festivus!
Its off to Jamiaca for me, mon!