I have been married 3 years and am 23 yrs old and my hubby is 24 yrs old.We dated 7 months before marrying we met while in college he had just decided to drop out of college and i was changing majors.He was my polar and it was love at first sight he had a bad boy image and me the good girl image.My parents disapproved completly but kept paying my tuition from college till i graduated.Problems though started happening after i became pregnant he cheated on me and was partying hard.I was very stressed out and derpressed i lost the baby at 4 months.We went to therapy and he stopped .Then came temper problems mainly shoving me i had a younger cousin 6 yrs old coming to visit and i was putting his old porn movies away.He came in and slapped me across the face giving me a bloody nose thinking i was try to throw away his property.He apologized said it was never going to happen again but i am afraid of him now.I have been staying with a friend ever since.
2006-12-18 05:09:39 · 20 answers · asked by Adelina R 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I know when i got married for better or worse i meant it but i cant bring myself to go home to him again.He keeps calling me but i am afraid to answer.
2006-12-18 05:12:18 · update #1
I dont know what to do should i believe him?
2006-12-18 05:14:00 · update #2
Been there, done that, you are on the typical downhill road of being the wife killed by her husband- been there, done that. I did not believe it and I always went back. After the yelling and names, then the shoving, then the slapping, then the hair pulling and choking.. I still did not learn, the state of cali had to come in and take my kids away saying to either pick my husband, or my kids- at that point I said goodbye, but before that, I held "for better or worse" seriously to my heart. Do not make the same mistake. It does not get better.
2006-12-18 05:16:52 · answer #1 · answered by allaboutme_333 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is the cycle of abouse tho. He'll beat the crap out of you, say he's sorry, then you'll go back, then it'll all start all over again.
You need to file a restraining order against him. You need to report it so that it'll follow him. Make sure that he can't come near you so you can stop the cycle. Don't worry the fear will fade as you become stronger and learn that you do deserve a man who will love and respect you and practically worship the ground you walk on. You are worthy of a man who treats you better than this slime ball will ever. What ever you do, don't feel sorry for him if he comes up with some lame excuse for why he slapped u. There is never a good excuse to hit a woman, no matter what!
2006-12-18 12:20:39 · answer #2 · answered by firstlove021 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your health and your life is way more important than some vows that were broken by him anyway. I know people in the church will tell you to try to work it out, but plain and simply, you married the wrong guy and he may be a good man at heart, but right now, he is very damaged and could probably hurt you because of his damage. think of your safety, ask him to get some help, but in the meantime, stay far away from him. You could end up dead if you don't. You hear too many stories of women staying out of fear and ending up dead or injured severly.
2006-12-18 05:18:58 · answer #3 · answered by babygyrl_nyc 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is one of those times when divorce is the answer. NO one disservice to be mistreated like that. You should also seek some counseling to help you heal the wounds he has created. You may find it hard to trust any man after the way you been treated.
Don't be the next news at 11. To many people in this world die from the abuse of others.
2006-12-18 05:26:08 · answer #4 · answered by December K 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not go back to him. Yes, you married for better or worse, but this is not worse. This is wrong. He has no right hitting you like that. The only reason for him to hit you is if you were actually trying to kill him. I believe that is not the case here. Get a divorce, fast and tell your parents. Your family will always be there for you. Good luck and I hope you take everyone's advice in here who tell you to get out. He will never change. One day he might kill you.??????
2006-12-18 05:24:46 · answer #5 · answered by Meuy V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The worse thing you could do would be to believe him and go back, without any evidence that he has done anything to change. Has he taken Anger Management classes? Has he done anything to better himself?
If you've got a degree and no kids, there really isn't anything to hold you to him. Except your feelings and maybe feelings of self-worth.
Odds are you'd be better off divorcing the guy and moving on. Otherwise, we'll probably be reading about you in the paper or seeing you on COPS.
2006-12-18 05:18:09 · answer #6 · answered by p_carroll 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For better or for worst does not mean you have to take physical abuse. Husbands who hit their wives do it to hide their inadequacies. He is a college drop out, probably jealous of your success, but that is no excuse. Be glad that you don't have a child or your husband would have physically abused him/her also. Get yourself a good divorce lawyer, but before that get a restraining order. Hitting you and appolgizing and you forgiving him only makes him do it again. Think about it.
2006-12-18 05:54:07 · answer #7 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GOD did not mean when he said til death doyou apart for him to kill you....get my drift...This man is a violent man and you need to get out of that situation and move on because the violence seems to only be getting worse...If you cherish your life and want to have kids, you need a fresh start away from that fool...You are young and you have your whole life in front of you, you don't need a man to cut it off.....You can do much better that this man...
2006-12-18 06:52:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be afraid to answer the phone! Pick it up and tell that phys co,he only did you a favor!! and don't bother you about coming home because you refuse to be a battered woman!Then tell him to find someone else he can overpower,by putting his hands on,because your not his damn child!! THen you tell him,sorry will not cut it,you already know he's sorry,now what!!
2006-12-18 05:39:45 · answer #9 · answered by hot chocolate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NOW is the best time to get out of this relationship. He's cheated on you and now physically hurt you. You have no children to mess up (I'm sorry for your loss) and so right now you have responsibililty to yourself to make your life better. So your parents were right, swallow your pride and make your life better by ditching the abusive, cheating jerk!
2006-12-18 05:17:48 · answer #10 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋