Can honestly say that they have acted with class toward their former spouses? I for one would be lieing if I said I was classy, I hate my ex husband, not for our marriage failure which I take more than half the blame for, but for the way he's neglected my daughter. I truly hope God gets him for every time he's made my daughter cry. Am I the only classless person or are there others?
2006-12-18 05:05:31 · 10 answers · asked by gitsliveon24 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't ever speak ill of him in front of my daughter but in the 2 times a year he calls her drunk he does of me
2006-12-18 05:21:05 · update #1
While a lot of people say they "agreed" to divorce and the split was amicable, this is hardly ever true. My ex left me for another man and left our daughter with me. It was difficult for me not to trash her in every conversation I had about her with my daughter. Most of us who were trying to make a marriage work resent the ex who wrecked the family. I think it is only natural. You should be commended for not forcing your feelings for your ex onto your daughter.
2006-12-18 05:56:21 · answer #1 · answered by This is lame 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do. Because I love my child more than I hate my ex husband. That simple. That's her father and since we divorced respectfully, our friendship is respectable. No, I don't like him as a friend or want him back, but he's a great father and is the #1 man in the person I love the most's life. So, for those reasons, I do act respectfully towards him.
Okay having said that, as peaceful as I am now, it would be just the opposite if he mistreated my daughter. Hell hath no fury and class has NOTHING to do with you mistreating my child. The hate would probably consume me if that happened. I hope you find a way to let it go and just nurture and raise your daughter. He is not important if he doesn't want to be there but protect her from him because jumping in and out of a child's life is way worse than never being there at all.
2006-12-18 13:24:30 · answer #2 · answered by babygyrl_nyc 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can say without a doubt that I handled all procedures in a civilized manner, and so did he. We agreed upon everything when we divorced and no nastiness was needed while getting divorced, We had done all the bitter and all the nasty already during our breakup, so putting and end to it was the easy part.
We negotiated the terms of the divorce and acted in the best interest of our baby. We made a promise of not talking bad about each other during vistation and such. We still remain friendly and there is no bitterness in our conversations.
I still resent him for what he did to me and because he was just plain evil and sneaky. I'm not his friend because there is no sense in faking it, but I still act in a classy and calm when we meet for visitation and over the phone. If anything, I feel sorry for him.
I remain calm for my son's sake, he saw us argue for so long and I won't put my son through that again! He pays his child support on time and minds his own bussiness, we are still parents and have to give our son the best example possible.
Good luck
2006-12-18 13:30:28 · answer #3 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am guilty! Of letting my emotions controll what I say or do to the other side of the argument. I always seem to push the exact buttons to make things worse.. My anger is geared towards the fact he thinks he did nothing wrong though, then turns around and says that I claim that, when I have admited to myself, him, AND our friends at the time, the mistakes I had made-
I have forgiven him now, but have not talked in months, I think he is some where down south really high on drugs(he was last time I talked to him), or dead.
2006-12-18 13:13:03 · answer #4 · answered by allaboutme_333 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two different things going on here....if you hate him and feel unclassy in your feelings, well then you are being a super wonderful protective mom towards your kid. However, if you talk horribly towards him, about him, and/or make it even more difficult for your daughter to have a relationship with him, then you should re-evaluate how you are acting. Feeling and acting are two different things, if you can separate the two, then you are being a classy person.
2006-12-18 13:13:43 · answer #5 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't say that I've always acted with class. However, I think largely I have.
I still try to be civil with her, as we share a child.
I will never agree that her affair was justified, and calling it what it is is not a classless act.
I believe I have to continue to act with class to provide my daughter with a role model regarding behavior.
2006-12-18 13:11:43 · answer #6 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is crazy to spend time and energy on someone who has had such a negative impact on your life!!! Let it go! The more hatred and "Classless" behavior you show, the worse you look. Learn to smile and keep your mouth shut - you will look like the better person to your daughter in the end!
2006-12-18 13:23:52 · answer #7 · answered by Kailey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think your being classless at all.. as a matter of fact I totally understand what your going thru.. you as the mom... cherish, nurture, give confidence, laughs, giggles, love, care, etc....
for some man especially the child's dad to make her feel any other way is appalling...
2006-12-18 13:42:24 · answer #8 · answered by ﺸÐïåMóñdÐôññåﺸ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been civil, but not friendly. Never speak badly about an ex to, or in the hearing of, a child; it is not the child's fault!
2006-12-18 13:11:01 · answer #9 · answered by AnnieD 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We hate our ex-spouses. That's normal. Who can like em? But I don't have kids from my ex, so I don't have to see him at all. It must be hard for you and those with kids, as you have to see the EX. My condolences.
2006-12-18 13:34:42 · answer #10 · answered by crazyloonynice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋