me and my husband are going through a divorce right now due to differences and traditionally the mother gets the kids. he wants his kids though but i told him no. i am not a bad mother at all but he simply can't bear to be away from his child. i told him he could visit anytime but he wants full custody because he says he deserves to be entitled to full custody just as a mother would.( i think he just does'nt want to pay child support which i tried to work out for him) he makes about 6,000$ more than i do a month. but he is often gone alot due to his job.we both live well off. don't i have a better off chance getting custody of my child. i'm the mother, she should be with me. my child is 4 years old. the mother always gets the kids. What do you think i should do in court?
2006-12-18 04:56:12 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i think that since you are the mother you should get custody. there is nothing a man can teach a girl about growing up. also, he is not home enough to even spend efficient time with her. get your child girl. he can't just yank your child from you either.
2006-12-18 05:02:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋
I think that you guys should work out a parenting plan agreement and go from there...... you both could have the same amount of custody neither one would have to have more then the other.....
talk to the judge and tell him/her that you would like for your husband to have the same amount of custody as you do... but either way he will have to pay support since he no longer lives in the same home as you......
but seriously work that parenting plan out with him and your guys lawyers.... that would be the best way and the judge will honor your guys choices and that way you guys make the rules and not some stranger that doesn't know the situation that way...
2006-12-18 13:02:42 · answer #2 · answered by evil_fallen_angel41 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Joint custody with 50/50 parenting time, if you can't work out the marriage, then make sure that both of you have equal access to being a parent.
Your promises for access are not really worth anything unless you are willing to put them in the custody agreement.
He is her father, and his contribution, while different from yours is equally important to yours.
I think you should tell the judge that even if you two cannot get along, you recognize that the father is equally important as the mother, and you want to ensure that he gets as much time as he wants with his daughter, as you recognize that the most important relationship a daughter has with a man before she marries is with her father, and that while you may not romantically love him, you want to see that relationship be as healthy and vibrant as possible.
2006-12-18 13:02:21 · answer #3 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if he is gone alot then most often you will get the child because his work interfer with the child but if he didnt work alot he could have an equal chance at the child to because most men dont fight for their child and the judge would see that and it could go in the favor of the man but you both have to prove to the judge why he or she is an unfit parent. Good luck but its a 80% chance that you will win based on the fact that he work alot and be gone alot from home
2006-12-18 13:03:41 · answer #4 · answered by dre 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By all means no dont give him full custody get joint custody and she can live w/him if thts wht he wants but w/you both sharing custody of her. The mother usually gets custody but it all depends if shes a fit mother or not. Not sure your case but im guessing you are. Consult a lawyer and see all options open then take it from there.
2006-12-18 13:01:05 · answer #5 · answered by B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would hope you want your child with you. You just get your lawyer to give you full custody and visitation to your husband. If your soon to be ex is always gone for his job what does he want with a kid? You keep that child with and just allow visits to your husband.. I am sure he will survive and the world won't end if he doesn't get full custody
Good luck
2006-12-18 13:01:37 · answer #6 · answered by coolchica4u2000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you said the key words----"the mother always gets the kids". but its up to the court.....we went thru this same situation with a child, who is now 16 yrs old. my question is, who is the better parent, mother or father? the courts always seem to lean toward the mother, but in our case the mother was not the best choice for the child. now the child is ruined.....so talk to your lawyer, it sounds to me like a 4 yr old female should go with her mom...but to stay home and raise the child it very important in todays society. home schooling is another thought and could play in your favor to keep the child.
2006-12-18 17:43:46 · answer #7 · answered by lake living 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it doesn't matter what we say here on answers. the father is certainly entitled to at least liberal visitation, if not joint custody. i don't see that a judge would give him sole custody, but i guess stranger things have happened. in court, act like a mother who wants custody. talk about her by name, not "the kid" or "my daughter". wear stylish, clean clothes-not a miniskirt. you will be fine.
2006-12-18 13:03:55 · answer #8 · answered by sinned 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is get an attorney and let the courts decide. Since he is going for full custody, you probably should too. You can always settle for joint when it comes right down to it.
2006-12-18 13:00:13 · answer #9 · answered by PDH 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that you guys should fight over the kids they need both of their parents. You should work out something and share them. It is not fair for the kids if you take them away from him, or if he takes them away from you.
2006-12-18 13:00:43 · answer #10 · answered by Jamie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋