The pressure to have sex is so much I sometimes feel there is a lot I'm missing out there. Do I hold on to abstinence or let go of the passion flooding through my veins?
2006-12-18 02:56:50 · 7 answers · asked by sonofdestiny 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I can sense the pressure myself... holding yourself up all these years... that's pretty tough!!! What you do is pretty admirable because I cannot find myself being in your shoe abstaining myself... even at least from masturbating! I once tried, but i failed. I guess what you need to do is ask yourself: is all what you do at the moment (abstaining and all) worth what you're advocating for? and if you do let go, would it be awfully bad and would it put everything to waste? I think it all boils down to what you value really. Obviously, in your case, you have to choose one over the other. It may be tough dealing with the guilt or pressure that may follow your decision, but it should be liberating later on. Good luck! ;-)
2006-12-18 04:41:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
*hug*
I mean this in the most positive way I can -- although writing it positively is difficult I'm afraid.
I started having sex at 13 (maybe barely 14, by weeks) -- I have never regretted it for a single minute. I've had four lovers over the years and had sex with over a dozen of my close friends -- mostly straight -- when I was young, at this point in my life Jonathan and I will have been together for 15 years on the 2nd of January and are probably together for life.
I don't know why you are virgin or abstinent -- and I am terribly, terribly sorry that you feel that is what you should be. :-( It must be terribly lonely. I think you should let go and let the passion take you --- but ---- I also know that no boi holds onto such an unnatural thing as abstinence unless there is pressure -- usually from one of the (pardon my bluntness please) nuttier religions. If that is the case then I suggest that you first take enough time to get rid of the guilt and shame inculcated by those cults, particularly if you are a member of one of the biblio-idolator groups. Just don't take too long, I've seen people, of both genders and both sexualities, who followed some of the more extreme groups too long -- until their looks faded and they were no longer desireable. There is no greater bitterness than realizing at 40 that you have wasted the good life that was available to you -- are alone, no longer able to maintain your looks, even if you tried -- and without appreciable social skills -- all due to a cult that bedazzled you, but no longer does. The veil gone from your vision you see 40 years of waste behind, and little chance ahead. That is where dithering too long leads. Any god worth serving doesn't want you to suffer and to be alone.
Kind regards,
Reynolds Jones
http://www.rebuff.org
believeinyou24@yahoo.com
2006-12-18 14:37:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being gay, virgin and somewhat of a abstinence advocate myself (at 20), I'm facing the same issue, though the pressure is not so high. I'm not practicing abstinence, only that I don't like flings and have not really met a guy that I really want to share myself with. Its totally up to you, but I don't see what its really going to achieve. But my gosh its 26 years, you came so long. Maybe you should wait.
2006-12-18 04:08:17 · answer #3 · answered by Silver 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i do not understand why you are an abstinence advocate i do not think that there is any thing wrong with sex. i am a virgin at 18 years of age and i think it sucks but i have not been out very long and i do not know a lot of gay guys and a dont want to have casual sex . but once i meet a nice hot gay guy that is going to change. so any ways to answer your question we need to know why you are an abstinence advocate.
2006-12-18 04:18:56 · answer #4 · answered by joe s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's completely up to you. I don't see it as "let[ting] go of the passion flooding through [your] veins", but rather, normal human sexual interaction. It's not something you can't live without, but it's also not something incredibly special, as you have clearly made it out to be.
2006-12-18 03:00:36 · answer #5 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm, have you heard of masturbation? Seems to me that you need to help yourself to some :-)
2006-12-18 03:05:05 · answer #6 · answered by marionbarryuk 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No matter what your choice is it wii be the right one.
2006-12-18 04:00:31 · answer #7 · answered by sfangelsfangel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋