I used to think that If you had developed a rapport with someone, based upon many intellectual, emotional and spiritual aspects, and that if therein existed loyalty, truth, happiness & respect.. that two people could always be friends, no matter what life threw at either or both of them. Is this naive?
Are the troubles of the world just too much for friendship to handle? Why are so many people wishy washy (ambivalent)? Have they all just gotten raw deals & feel they must take it out on those they love the most, because they feel "safe" somehow?
I'm still convinced that there are good people out there. But which rock are they hiding under?
2006-12-18 01:47:47 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
This seems like just another aspect of our so-called disposable society. If someone's not perfect (which nobody is), then just throw him/her away and start over anew?
2006-12-18 01:50:34 · update #1
John Doe & ";-" (whoever)-- you've just been reported for abuse. Quit wasting bandwidth & other people's time. Answer the freaking question, for crying out loud.
2006-12-18 01:53:21 · update #2
Well the only thing you can do is to continue searching for them. You would truly noe who you true friends or friend are a some point of your live. Just continue to make friends as frined are still a blessing and a sign for hope that will carry on in you. There are good people, you should just be patient and continue to make new friends. Thats the only thinyou can do.
2006-12-18 01:53:11 · answer #1 · answered by A A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The elusive creature is in YOU. Not anywhere outside.
When you are in the developing stage of a relationship or friendship, the demand you make on yourself and on the other will be high initially. As you go along further ,the demand should come down drastically and at a point it should be totally nil.
This is contrary to the usual thinking ... that a friend should be able to be ready at all times to help etc. If one keeps on piling the demands and choke the other person then slowly the friendship will wither away. When you start to GIVE more than you TAKE friendship thrives. Allow space for each individual to breathe. Let the relationship be natural. You will see that you are becoming a better friend, a true friend for many .
2006-12-18 09:59:30 · answer #2 · answered by YD 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are correct in part. Friendship does not grow on trees and can't be a forced issue.
My test for friendship only includes one small word: Respect!
What I notice when I think a friendship has failed comes in the form of disrespect, that is; Those that call at the last minute and change my plans or repeat things to others that I originally thought was in confidence.
Today, most of my friends understand that, the word "respect" is my focus. Tell me you can't make it, tell me you said something you shouldn't have, don't expect me to believe in gossip and never ever mess with my family! In a nut shell: I tell my friends when they offend me or I think, what they are doing is wrong.
Seems to work, at least I haven't had any complaints for some time. And, although being honest up front may seem adversarial, it weeds out your true friends from those that think only of themselves.
2006-12-18 10:02:20 · answer #3 · answered by ggraves1724 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first step in finding a true friend is being a true friend. A true friend is someone that sticks with you even when you have given up on yourself. It's not someone that will do anything you ask them to, its someone that will do things without having to ask them. There are plenty of good people out there. Some of them hide at church, school, hospitals, police stations, fire houses, and on park benches just to name a few. You may even find a few on here.
2006-12-18 09:57:07 · answer #4 · answered by RayCATNG 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
TRUE friends are hard to come by. You will hear people say " I have tons of friends". Do they really? I say, "I have 3 good friends." These are the ones I can count on NO MATTER WHAT. How many of people's friends will come to their rescue--NO MATTER WHAT? Think about it and then decide how many friends you really have. people use the term friends too loosely. It takes years to build a lasting friendship that is true and that can endure all. GOOD LUCK. They are there, just takes time to find them.
2006-12-18 09:53:05 · answer #5 · answered by Deb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Inasmuch as I would like to agree with you in some aspect, I still want to disagree on some. Let me start by saying that there's no perfect human being anywhere - not even myself nor yourself. But one good aspect of any friendship or friendship is that we "learn from each other as we GROW in relationship". But that depends on the premise on which that relationship is built. If love and trust are the watch-words, then there's bound to be a considerable amount of growth and mutual understanding as time goes on. But if built on deceit and mere lustful considerations, then, chaos and mistrust are eminent, and this often leads to animorsity, suspicion and, eventually, separation. Contact me through my profile if you want us to discuss further. cya.
2006-12-18 10:05:25 · answer #6 · answered by mykemejeje 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is only one way to find the perfect friends that you are searching for. it comes in one of my favorite sayings, (((You never really know someone - until they let you know them))) - the true friend you seek is inside yourself, as you release the true you slowly, then slowly you will build a ring of friend that love you for you, i know it is hard to be 100% you, we have to change ourselves at work or any other place we go just to fit in, but slowly incorporate the real you into these places and others will notice and those that feel as you do will show themselves and from those you might and hopefully find that true friend, but start with the inner you, i hope this helps you, good luck
2006-12-18 10:02:08 · answer #7 · answered by Lumper35 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i should know what a true friend is because i have one actually not just one but a few, and they are rare to find but they are always there when u need them for instance there have been a few times when i needed help because i was feeling sad and i would call up my friend moy tell him what the problem is and a few min later he was at my house ready to take me out to lunch to talk about it and it made me feel alot better they will always be there for you, its the small things that they do for you that make u smile and appreciate them because you know you can count on them for anything.
2006-12-18 09:55:24 · answer #8 · answered by btheman8 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are good people out there you just have to look deep enough. Sometimes you just have to get to know someone and disregard the dangers of getting hurt.
2006-12-18 09:50:37 · answer #9 · answered by vw chick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋