i live in cyprus and if a girl gets pregnant she gets married. im in a serious relationship so thats ok. but i feel im not ready to have a baby and get married. im not even 19 yet. but i dont wanna have abortion, im very against it. i do love my bf, im just very nervous.
2006-12-17 19:10:30 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Take a deep breath and calm down. I know it feels like you're completely alone right now, but you're not alone in this situation. Girls and women face this every day and you've got some decisions to make. You are very lucky that you have a boyfriend that loves you because a lot of women don't.
You don't have to make your decisions alone. Talk to your boyfriend and both of your parents (yours and his, if you can) and discuss adoption or marriage. You've already eliminated abortion since you're against it.
Just remember that this is YOUR decision because it's YOUR body and YOUR baby. Do not let anybody try to talk you into something that you are uncomfortable with or morally opposed to. If you don't want to have an abortion, then DO NOT DO IT! If you don't feel like you can financially support a baby, then I suggest adoption. It will be hard, but ultimately you have to do what's best for the well-being of the child.
Marriage is also another option. You really have to know the man you're going to marry before you make that commitment. Is he willing to commit to raising a child or will he leave you for another woman? If you have doubts, then I suggest going with adoption and putting marriage on hold until you feel that both of you are mature enough and ready for it. Don't take marriage lightly. It will also be hard, but a lot of couples started off that way with an unexpected surprise that turned out to be a wonderful blessing. My sister got pregnant unexpectedly at 22 and she married her boyfriend. They went on to have 2 more beautiful children and have built a loving, stable home and have been married for 10 years.
I will be thinking about you and I hope everything goes well for you.
2006-12-17 19:31:01 · answer #1 · answered by Hez 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Sweetie,
I am getting here pretty late on the scene and it seems that you have gotten some truly AWFUL COMMENTS ( I will not call them answers) but you have also gotten some very good advice and that is what you should take to heart. Ignore the childish comments like "you should have thought of that!" and all the others along those lines. They are just petty, unkind people that like to feel superior by pointing fingers at others. Focus on the good answers that you have gotten from some mature, clear thinking individuals who have really given you some good advice. I think it is probably pretty normal to feel scared and overwhelmed right now! There is so much to think about. I am really glad that you are clear on not wanting to have an abortion. That would just cause more problems of its own so it is great that you are not thinking along those lines. It is also wonderful that you say that you love your boyfriend and I am sure that you know he loves you.
Let this take some time to sink in. At least sleep on it while. (maybe you already have!).
You will feel better when you have had some time to talk to your boyfriend and to talk to your loved ones. It would be a good idea to talk to you parents if you are close enough to them and you don't think that they would have a major fit of some kind.
You have many wonderful things ahead of you and some wonderful experiences to look forward to. Always look ahead and never look back. You can not change what has happened you can only make up your mind to make the future the best that it can be. You can do that! You have a precious little baby to look forward to! you have a man that loves you and you should really be counting your blessings. There are thousands of women in the world that would give anything to be able to trade places with you! So many women that will never know the joy of holding their very own little baby in their arms, you are very lucky!
Take care and look on the bright side, always.
If you need to talk or if I have left out any of your questions, feel free to write to me, I will always write back.
Love and Blessings
Lady T~
2006-12-18 09:36:40 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Trinity 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
God some people on here are t*ts.
First of all - of course you are nervous. Having a baby is a big thing. If you keep it, it will change your life and you will have alot of responsibility. But alot of 19 year olds have babies and turn out to be fantastic mums! So if you decide to keep it - you will be fine. The people who love you will support you, so don't worry.
Secondly - if you decide not to keep it. You have the options of adoption, or even termination (abortion). But you do not believe in abortion so you could always set it up for adoption. There are alot of loving couples out there who cannot make babies themselves and they would give your baby lots of love. So that's something to think about.
Either way, yes this is not a nice experience, but you sound intelligent and if you are in a loving relationship, perhaps you two can make it work out well for the baby and yourselves.
All the best - and don't let all these idiots get you down!
You'll be fine.
2006-12-17 19:23:41 · answer #3 · answered by quay_grl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well while I agree that should have been in your thinking before you had unprotected sex but if your not ready to have a baby or take care of the child, I can suggest adoption. My wife and I would love to adopt a baby boy and are trying to have another baby but with her PCOS it's harder for her and when we think we might be she starts. But back to what you asked. If your not ready to raise a child, consider adoption please don't even think about abortion. Too many good childless couples would provide a great home for a baby.
2006-12-18 13:46:25 · answer #4 · answered by Georgia Preacher 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
properly indications or no longer you are able to desire to purpose. First reaction is the ideal attempt obtainable. attempt approximately 3 days before you omit a era. If its detrimental and your era is previous due, wait a on an analogous time as longer. It takes a on an analogous time as for the hormone to show up on your urine. It took me each and every week after my era replaced into due. And easily your mom isn't on top of issues right here. i'm against abortion thoroughly as i'm pregnant myself, yet there is various unfastened very own clinics that could desire to consult with you approximately pondering an abortion. Its very puzzling raising a newborn financially and mentally. and that i comprehend which you admit you're no longer waiting. Screw what absolutely everyone else thinks or says. in case you're no longer waiting , do no longer convey yet another life into the international to go through. adult adult males this age are immature and irresponsible. Please evaluate your recommendations. Your mom does not could desire to make sure or tension you into making a life changing determination honey. you're so youthful and have yet to adventure life to the fullest. discover somebody you love and have a toddler then. (:
2016-10-05 11:03:57 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's perfectly normal to be nervous. Having a baby is a big step! Don't take this the wrong way but if you weren't ready to have a baby then you shouldn't have had sex. Temptations are hard but if you truly love this person you need to talk to your bf about and get the support you need!
2006-12-17 21:40:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are bringing a new life to this earth. You will be a mentor and a best friend to someone that will always look up to you and love you. Being nervous in this situation is a good thing, it makes you think, it lets you work out all of your options. I was nervous about having my son, I was up till he turned 2 years old. You will always worry but don't look at it as a bad thing. God wouldn't of givin you the ability to conceive this child if you weren't ready in some way. There will always be someone to turn to. Trust your conscience, it will guide you through your tough times. You may also E-mail me if you need to talk.
2006-12-17 19:22:10 · answer #7 · answered by zelin 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
thats good to hear.. but don't be nervous its a natural feeling especially your facing new chapter of your life.. be strong... your lucky coz the father of your upcoming child is with you many woman out there is pregnant without any man support and still are very strong and able to cope with it. dont get marry if your not ready just be happy with your bundle of blessing.Goodluck! Godbless!
2006-12-17 19:49:25 · answer #8 · answered by mysweetart18 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Abortion is not the only option when you are not able to care for a baby. Your baby can be adopted by a family who is fully prepared to love and provide for a child.
Discuss the situation with a counsellor to figure out what is best for both you and the baby.
2006-12-17 19:21:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
being nervous is a very common thing when you find out your pregnant. i was for bout 2 weeks the first time i got pregnant. if yout 18ish you are aloued to get mrried without perental consent. i would be happy to help in any means possible so if you need to talk e-mail me. merry christmas
2006-12-17 19:15:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋