How can I be supportive of others?

Question

I have difficulty being supportive of others. I don't know if I understand why. I don't know how to fix it either.

hypothetical example, let's say I have a friend who is going to college to get a degree in something they are passionate about.

I have a really hard time trying to show support of something like that. The above is just a random example. It doesn't matter what the issue is, a job, education, etc, I always have a hard time showing support. In all honesty, I have little-to-no genuine admiration of whatever it is they are doing. I won't offer fake support.

What is wrong with me and what can I do about it?

I think I need to clarify a little. I don't have difficulty being supportive when it comes to people's problems.

I only have difficulty being supportive of POSITIVE things.

Answer 1

Personally... I would have an easier time finding a friend in someone like you who is able and willing to come clean with their inner demons and not walk around faking everything and feiging happiness when you may very well just be jealous... Most people are just full of crap and feel more like you do that you may realize.

It is human, it is natural and there is nothing wrong with it.

Some people prefer honesty. Maybe you need new peers?

Answer 2

One Possibillity;
Are You fulfilling your dreams?
In offering help to those in need says you enjoy the feeling of being superman and saving the day. There is nothing wrong with being a hero, minor or major. Helping those less fortunate, or friends stuck or lost is a good way to feel better about you, but when it gets out of hand, your focus on them deters you from looking at self and dealing with your own, real or percieved, esteem and accomplishment issues.
Seeing someone succeed can be boring, compared to the excitement and possible adulation of being a savior.
If this is the case, you'll want to change before you have kids, as this behavior could set you up to drive them into repeated failures so you can fix them.
A change in the things you believe may be important to long term(lifetime) stability, happiness, and success, by learning from those who have all of those qualities you can learn to see them as desireable. Life is only lived today, or the little sliver known as now, but without today choosing goals, dreams, etc.. for tomorrow, we don't have purpose.
Look at life as a journey, like a continual hike. How well you pack and how much knowledge of your surroundings you have, the better your journey will be. These others are packing for the hike and you don't seem to care. Are you packing as well. I'd doubt you are. Finding a passion, or purpose for yourself, not someone else, will help you to get in touch with the goals and dreams of others, as well as find some for yourself.

Answer 3

Try to put yourself in the place of the person who needs your support. If you were about to undertake a new job or degree, wouldn't you want your friends and family cheering you on?

Doesn't mean you have to be overly gushy about it. Just make sure they know that you are proud of them and think what they are doing will be wonderful for them.

Answer 4

Listen to their wishes and desires and encourage that which u think is right. And don't give harsh opinion abt anything even if u think its bad. Tell them you are with them and think so too. If something they are doing is bad, then tell them softly and not rudely. Like being supportive.... :-)

Answer 5

Just start small. When a friend is telling you about something they want to achieve you can just say small things like, "I know you can do it," or, "That sounds great." Just give them positive feedback.

Answer 6

there is nothing wrong with you , other peoples problems are not of your concern , unless its your family or friends , if you cant be supportive of your famil and friends you might be a sociopath

Answer 7

Just be a good listener.