Started 10 years ago
2006-12-17 14:02:37 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
People can grow apart. Do you try to take an interest in the things she likes to do? Do you invite herto join you in activities. It's easy to take marriage for granted, you have to always put an effort into it to make it work. And you have to make her feel like your woman, not just your wife.
2006-12-17 14:08:06 · answer #1 · answered by honey 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So what have you done about it? You've waited a decade for something to change. Have you tried to make the change happen? Couples all the time fall into a morass of taking each other for granted, and then the love fails, and then they split up. Is that what you want? Nobody in a relationship has the right to let that relationship fail without a fight. Nobody in a relationship should have let things slide for a decade without doing something about it. DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Recycle your relationship. Suprise her with flowers, and two tickets to HER favorite show or concert. Act like you two have just met, and started dating. If the kiddies miss a ballet class, or a baseball game, TOO BAD! You need to put the ship of your relationship back on an even kiel right now. Relearn everything about her you fell in love with before, and show her all the things she fell in love with you too. Force time into your schedules for just the two of you to be just the two of you. When you dated, where did you go? what did you do? Do it again! Go there again! If this is impossible, find something else that BOTH of you like AND DO IT!
Don't whatever you do let this be a short term quick fix, or next time we'll be reading about how your spouse wants a divorce. Once the two of you are back, STAY THERE. Be accutely aware of your relationships status, and be ready to fix it right away. Don't wait 10 days, much less 10 years. That time you forced into your schedules for just the two of you? Keep it there always. Expensive? Sure is! How much does a divorce cost financially, and emotionally?
2006-12-17 22:26:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First thing you should have never waited for 10 years to pass by. however here we are now. So have you tryed expressing to her that you dont' feel loved, or appreciated. Women do that all the time so dont' feel your not being a man about it if you ask. these are your feelings you feel too and you need to be loved also. maybe you know so much time has passed and you both got use to a certain way and kids came along and you both forgot how to get back to basics. why not sit her down be open with your feelings and have her respond back to you. perhaps she's also feeling a bit unloved and you both can work on getting that back.
good luck
2006-12-18 01:00:14 · answer #3 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I answered a similar question... here was my response:
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“It is impossible to fall out of love. Love is such a powerful emotion, that once it envelops you it does not depart. True love is eternal. If you think that you were once in love, but fell out of it, then it wasn't love you were in. There are no 'exit' signs in love, there is only an 'on' ramp.” - Anonymous
To answer, personally, however. I thought one of the reasons why my husband and I seperated (we were together for 10 years before that, beginning at the age of 15) was because I was falling out of love for him, but that wasn't the case.
Dispite his faults and the way he treated me (so badly to the point of seperation) I still love him; and always will. I am not "in love" with him now, probably haven't been for some time (we seperated last year) but with eveything we've been through, with all those years we've shared, I could never fall "out of love" for him.
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So goes for you and your wife... if the love was "genuine" to begin with, she probably still loves you, but is not "in love" with you.
The best thing to do is to communicate. Tell her how you feel.
I can't speak for your wife, but for me, if I do love (you) and want the relationship/marriage to work, I wouldn't get offended that you opened "this" up for discussion.
However, there are some women who would take offenese to this and may react very deffensivley.
This could mean that she does love you/is in love with you, and is hurt by the fact that you even have to ask...
-or-
She has something to hide, and that's why she's being so deffensive.
That's a tough question to answer, as it is something you should be asking HER.
-and-
YOU need to ask yourself if YOU'RE still in love with her.
Good luck.
.pEace.
2006-12-18 14:13:14 · answer #4 · answered by ...Tell Me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dan. Why would you say that? What happened 10 years ago? To her? To you?
2006-12-17 22:05:39 · answer #5 · answered by bountyhunter101 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow that's amazing you made it 18 yrs iam struggling with 7
2006-12-17 22:04:44 · answer #6 · answered by honeybuzz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do some things that are exciting. Go for a trip someplace or go to the movies once every three years. Maybe you have become boring. Are you older than she is?
2006-12-17 22:04:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
get a divorce 10 years ago.
2006-12-17 22:04:45 · answer #8 · answered by david 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is possible that ' the thrill is gone from your marriage and she is in love with someone else. She dosen't want to hurt you so she is not telling you. And she will lie so as not to hurt you.
2006-12-17 22:07:38 · answer #9 · answered by Agnon L 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not a question of whether she loves you, but whether you love her. Did you make a promise to love her the rest of her life? If you did, then keep it. You may not have love in return, but you have honour.
2006-12-17 22:06:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋