i had my son when i was 16 and i think im just as good a mum as someone whos older and i wasnt married and im still not married and never planning to get married. just because im not married doesnt make me bad mum. im now 26 and have been with my bf almost 10yrs and are happy with the way we are. why in this world would you get married when the devorice rate is so high. i dont believe you should get married just because your having baby or because you want to have baby.
2006-12-17 11:57:36 · 12 answers · asked by sommermarie1 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
I absolutely agree with you and further more the person that gave you a thumbs down for your question is an ASS!!!!! anyway!! I am 33 years young. I have a 3 month old little boy. I didn't purposely wait this long..I just didn't get pregnant all these years. If it was up to me..my son would be about 13 by now...lol.... I don't make a big deal about the marriage thing in this day and age. I see that people are soo "willy nilly" when it comes to sex, that everybody partakes. This makes marriage difficult because of trust issues. The divorce rate is tremendous and statistically the highest reason is because of infidelity...ssoooooo who needs it!! I am happy that I have my son and I have no regrets. I am a single mom with a great support system from his dad!! I cant ask for more. SO, tell the "haters" to kiss your ass and if your happy..then don't change a thing!!!
2006-12-17 12:18:31 · answer #1 · answered by Chynah D 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Its different for all. Some people have wonderful marriages. My grandparents did, my mom and dad did and My husband and I do. We got married at 19 and I got pregnant after we were married. We loved each other very much and wanted to be committed to each other for life. We have been married for 11 years now and are still going strong. We do everything equally and he is not a controlling man in anyway. I dont think divorce rate matters if you know you are willing to be with this person adn work things out. I love my husband so much I cant imagine it any other way. We have 3 boys and a girl on the way. We are Christians and marriage is just something you do if that is how you believe. Marriage is not for everyone and doesnt work out for everyone, but for some it works out just fine. If you dont mind having a baby without being married then that is fine too. But your right, you shouldnt get married just because you have a baby together if you know your relationship probably wont work out. Im not a person that is all into everyone getting married. It is just how I feel about it for me. Everyone else can make any decision they wish and I dont judge anyone. I have plenty of friends like yourself that have children and arent married.
2006-12-17 12:27:47 · answer #2 · answered by Blondi 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
People are old-fashioned....NOTHING wrong with it either...... Speaking from experience, I dont feel a need to be married just to have a baby........I got pregnant-----didn't get married and left the guy 3 months later........(abuser)~~~~~Anyways, I think if your happy, and want a family~~Mommy + Daddy I dont see a reason not to~~~ Unless theres signs it wont last forever, or your not sure.......A close friend of mine has been living with a guy for 16 years......She will NEVER marry him~~So I think its up to the person~~ Ive said things , but its how I was raised....
2006-12-17 13:17:13 · answer #3 · answered by Missy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had my oldest daughter when I was 17 and I swore I would never look at another man let alone ever have sex again. I met the man of dreams 5 yrs ago and we got married and had 2 more wonderful children. I guess it's up to each couple and I do strongly agree that you shouldn't get married just because you get pregnant.
2006-12-17 12:02:03 · answer #4 · answered by momof3 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I got pregnant when I was 21. We got married 6 months after. We didn't really get married because I was pregnant...I guess we kinda felt like if we can do this, we can do anything, so why not get married? I have been married for 4 years and lovin every minute of it.
2006-12-17 12:01:08 · answer #5 · answered by sunnysideup 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with one writer, getting married should be done out of love and desire to spent ones life with a select partner, not because your pregnant or want a baby. Doing so would be insane because if it don't work out the cost for one is heavy for divorce but most importantly marriage is a bond of love not just done on a whim. Pray about it, seek God and you will find answers. Marriage is a contract of love.
2006-12-17 14:53:07 · answer #6 · answered by Georgia Preacher 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is a commitment. If a guy cannot commit to you, why would he commit to raising a child, especially an unplanned child? I too had a child in my teens. We've been married 9 years now. We married because we wanted each other for life, not because of our child. So both of us (you and me) have proven our way can work. Its a matter of personal beliefs. I want that extra level of commitment, you don't. Marriage doesn't lead to divorce, choices do. Too many people treat marriage as a game instead of a life long commitment. Don't knock it just because you don't agree with it. I'm very happy being his Mrs.
2006-12-17 12:03:15 · answer #7 · answered by Velken 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
folks who have babies very young don't often have the support that you have with your bf and have to rely on others for emotional and financial support
that doesn't make a bad parent but it does add a lot of stress on people before most are ready for it
the advantage of being older when starting a family is that there is a greater likelihood of having more secure circumstances to bring the children into
the above are generalizations only - not meaning that they apply to all people in all cases
2006-12-17 12:04:48 · answer #8 · answered by Aslan 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i'm 21 and going on 2 yrs of marriage. we've not got young ones or something, yet we do have God. he's the rock of our relationship and if he did no longer think of we could shield it, i'm specific something diverse could've surpassed off. I see you expect, it may be great in case you purchased married, yet basically when you consider which you're having a toddler jointly does not advise you may desire to get married. in case you relatively love him and could see him on your destiny helping you financially, loving you, and consistently going to be there for then you you definately shouldn't carry back. Do you reside jointly? in case you do no longer reliable for you. It completely brings out the worst in couples. Why do i think of that? properly 1st. i think of that as quickly as you pass in to residing with one yet another there is mostly a fashion out. in case you do unlike him no longer cleansing up after himself, then you definately could desire to easily pass out, yet once you get married and and you have those issues your physique of suggestions is diverse because of the fact there's no way out. once you're married you have an helpful suggestions which you would be able to paintings via regardless of issues upward thrust up. i'm hoping this helps you and if he proposes congrats!!! ooh and congrats on the toddler!! what a latest! ooh and by utilising the way, my marriage is magnificent and that i'm hoping yours would be too!
2016-10-05 10:44:23 · answer #9 · answered by schnetter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I totally agree. I had my baby when I was 21. I'm 23 now still with my babies daddy and I have no plans to get married. I have seen so many divorces in my life and I refuse to be in that situation!
2006-12-17 12:30:20 · answer #10 · answered by tricksy 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋