I am a married man with kids, a home in my 30s making a good handsome salary - from outside no one can understand why I can be unhappy. The problems with my self are driving me nuts and now I am getting worried that I may even be let go from my work. I had some of these even before but gotten worse over last 1.5 yrs.
I fear a lot, procastrinate and have lost focus in life.
I have a low self confidence,self esteem,depressed and a push over.
I have not many friends.
I go online and lust with other married women.
I have tried going for counselling and also tried depression medication(which made things even worse). My family is supportive but they have also given up now. My relationship with my wife isnt very great either.
Everyday I ask God to end my life - ofcourse I never do it.
The only thing that excites me in life is lusting after women.
Help me!!! I dont know what to do. I want to be self-confident, focused and with a high self-esteem. Please help.
2006-12-17 07:50:16 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Men's Health
You said you tried counseling, but maybe you didn't find the right counselor for you or didn't give it enough time. These things are not usually instant fixes, but over a period of months, you should start to feel better. It takes patience, which is hard to come by when you feel so rotten. Depression can also be a simple matter of a chemical imbalance in the brain. If the anti-depressant you tried didn't work, there are others out there that might. It sounds like you started to look in the right places but didn't look hard enough or long enough. Have you spoken to your spiritual advisor? They are trained not to judge people but only to be supportive and helpful, and since you are a praying man, the spiritual approach could work for you.
I am not a mental health professional. But one thing that seems to help some of my friends is to find a new purpose in life. There are probably volunteer organizations in your community that are in great need of help. Visiting people in a nursing home, delivering Meals on Wheels, helping out at an animal shelter, reading books for the blind, volunteering with Habitat for Humanity--things like that can take you out of yourself and give you a feeling of worth and accomplishment. You need to get the focus off your problems and onto what you can do to make the world a better place. It might really make you (as well as those you help) feel much better. And there are no nasty side-effects to worry about.
2006-12-17 08:26:50 · answer #1 · answered by Maple 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, seriously get some counseling.
You need to tell your wife how you feel about the marriage, and question to yourself how it turned sour in the first place.
Also you can't let others take advantage of you, stand up for yourself. Anyway the more negative thoughts you think about, the more depressed your going to get. Think optimistically, and remember that YOU have the powerto turn any bad situation to a good situation. Its never too late change.
As for the online lust.. You better stop, atlthough I wouldn't be too surprised if your woman has been doing the same thing. To get more friends, join more social clubs that you are interested in. Having the courage to be more outspoken and having a casual conversation with a stranger about the weather (or even news) will boost your confident WAYY up.
Always believe in yourself and think positive! good luck (:
2006-12-17 08:15:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off Im gonna say you need to tell yourself this is your life. Your old enough now that you can take life into your hands and do whatever you want to do and become whoever you want to become. You need to get over all these other people that wronged you because you cant control them. Life really does suck and everyone gets screwed over at some point. I was close to goin pro in ball but got screwed last minute by some people. i can sit i my room and hate on those people and say how they ruined my life...or make something out of myself. I must say though I sat wallowing in pity for 2 years before i finally snapped out of it (similiar to the daze your in). Its a waste of time man, just get over it. Sounds harsh but you are the only person holding you back right now.
2016-05-23 02:36:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go running sounds stupid but you feel better afterwards and your apperance will change for the better.It will give you more energy so maybe you can spark something up again with the misses. Lot´s of people envy a person in your position with a family, job and a house. Be grateful for what you have worked so hard for.
2006-12-17 08:31:23 · answer #4 · answered by Jaming 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
what is it that makes you lust after these women.. will they role play with you ... if so ask your wife if she will give it a try.. start by playing dress up and maybe get a cam recorder and make your own porn if your bored in that area chances are she is too .. talk to her and see what she would like..don't be surprised if she says more foreplay a lot of men seem to forget that .. they think when there ready the women is ready
2006-12-17 09:17:02 · answer #5 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
sounds like depression see a doctor.
2006-12-17 13:55:38 · answer #6 · answered by coolray44 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go to church you would be suprized by how much God can do with your life
2006-12-17 08:58:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
GO GET SOME COUNCELING
2006-12-17 07:57:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋