my mum died in aug, i used to see her at xmas and im missing her?

Question

i want nothing to do with xmas but i have kids. i just want it over with. will it be any easier next year? i know its daft but i want to phone her for a good cry.

Answer 1

JUST DO YOUR BEST FOR THE KID`S,IT`S HARD I KNOW MOST OF MY FAMILY ARE DEAD I JUST WANT IT OVER WITH TOO,JUST ME AND MY WEE DOG.GOD BLESS

Answer 2

Im so sorry to hear that, i lost my dad last july so last xmas was really hard, ive got kids too and u have to just try and get on with it for the sake of them. This xmas is still goin to be hard but its a bit easier than last year. Have u got plenty of people u can talk to about how u are feeling? talk to a friend if u can and let it all out, if they are good friends they'l listen. If u dont there is CRUSE which i have just started goin to which helps, they have a help line, depends where u live tho. Just try and put a brave face on for the kids i know it will be hard. Its ok to cry aswell tho x

Answer 3

I'm sorry for your loss. You know, when my only brother died, my mother called to tell me that he had passed. I told her I loved her, and I'm glad I did, because, unbelievably, she lay down that day, went into a coma, and never got up again. Then, just 10 days after my brother died, she also died.

Now, that being said, let me tell you, that once, even knowing she was gone...I had to dial her phone number and let it ring until someone answered...just...just because. Then I hung up and cried.

Now that was 2 years ago. I'm a grandma myself. I think your Mum would want you to be happy with your children and do things that were traditional, when you were a child...in some way keeping her spirit with all of you.

I won't take up space to tell you how I know my mother is still with me at certain times, but, I think you will come over time to realise, she is gone....but forever with you.

Honey, try and get through the holidays, cry when you must, but laugh all you can. God Bless.

Answer 4

I think that the holidays always bring about a type of sadness, and deep memory of the people we love because they holidays are so special and we usually spent them with the people we lost.

1.You can't focus on the negative, she's gone but you remember her and that counts for something. Remember her in a positive light, she'd want that from you.

2.You have to be strog for your children, so they don't see you sad on Christmas I'm sure they'll be sad also.
If it helps get a picture of your mother and light a candle that will burn throughout the holidays. Personally it will keep her close to your heart and is a nice holiday gesture of rememberance.

3.Because she really means that much to you, maybe you should go put some flowers at the grave site, and leave notes or say a few words..
Good Luck..happy holidays.

Answer 5

It is only natural that you will be missing her especially at this time of year you have to think what your mum would have wanted you to do and that is getting on with it for the kids - yes it will mean you being brave but as long as you have good memories of your mum she will always be with you

Good luck and make the most of Xmas for your kids xx

Answer 6

It does get easier but its always hard at this time of year. My mum died 10 years ago and I still wish I could just phone her up. You will get through Christmas for your kids sake, but its ok to have a cry - and if your kids ask why you are sad you can tell them honestly its because you miss your mum. Take care xx

Answer 7

Sorry for your loss my dear, but, it is the circle of life. I believe that those who pass on don't want to come back here to pain, suffering, and tears, they see their love ones and pray that they will meet them in heaven a much better place. Try to find you a friend or support group to help you through this, and do not let your children feel your despair and sadness, they see Christmas as a joyful time. God Bless.

I just loss my mom (grandma raised me I call her mom) and I also was depressed, but by understanding scriptures and peoples advice I am in a better position today.

Answer 8

You are absolutely normal, Grief is absolutely normaland you should not let others tell you to get over it, even at Xmas. I know you want to make your childrens holiday right, and as much as you can , please do it, but don't punish yourself for it not being 100 percent. As for talking to your mom, you can not talk to her on the phone but you might feel better if you talked to someone else you loved who is older, or even someone who needs to be talked to as much as you need to talk. There are thousands of older people who are forgotten at this time of year as their children have other plans or can not be bothered. Find someone to reach out to in your mums name. Make it a Christmas tradition and your gift to her.

Answer 9

i'm very sorry to hear that. It is too natural to miss her because of the bondage and your love for each other. but it doesn't mean we should have a miserable xmas. Be strong and make it a joyful one with love overflowing to and from each other in the family - this is what your mum wanted to see. By being loving and caring for each other, you extend your mum's love to them too.

I'm not sure if you are a Christian, but this is a temporary separation.

Love extends life, and you can exhibit that by living it to the full.

God bless you all and have a wonderful Christmas. Take care.

Answer 10

This 'll be your first xmas without your mum, so i'm sure it'll be a little different 4 u. it's important to b strong 4 your kids, they probably miss grandma too. enjoy xmas, she would have been happy seeing you smile. good luck. *

Answer 11

Have a good cry sweetie. I had one when I was cooking the Christmas dinner the year my dad died. He always used to come over to our place Christmas Day as he was divorced from my mum. In fact I think I cried cooking the next 5 Christmas dinners thinking about him.