my friend is 22 years old and she has got a dwi in december of 2005 and she is doing everything to correct what she did although it dosent make it right, but she is still drinking everyday except for when she drives and i am getting really worried about her i talk with her about it and she tells me that she knows and she wants to stop but she says she has to because she is a stripper but thats an excuse i think, i want to go to her and tell her that i think she needs to stop and take some time or she can get really sick and i also think she might be pregnant to, i am just a concerned friend but how do i go about telling her in a nice way but also letting her know i am serious about it as well... please give me some advice. thanks
2006-12-17 02:50:28 · 11 answers · asked by brown_eyedgurl22 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I have worked for several years as a DJ at strip clubs. I have to say that getting nude in front of strangers is one of the most unnatural thing human beings can do... grinding in their laps is even more difficult. Honestly only one girl I've ever worked with was able to do it sober. They just have to numb the brain to do it. If it's not alcohol, it's weed or sometimes harder drugs. It becomes a vicious cycle. If you want to address her drinking, you'll end up needing to address her profession and whole lifestyle. It's likely to backfire on you. Just be a friend and be her shoulder to cry on when she needs one.
2006-12-20 17:40:39 · answer #1 · answered by Zloar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend seems to have a real big problem. The good thing is that you are telling her you are concerned. The bad thing is she isn't taking your advice and giving excuses or she truly wants to stop but isn't sure how and so she gives excuses so it doesn't seem as though she is weak and can't do it without help. Keep pestering her and ask her if she would like to go into rehab to help her. Don't bring up the fact you think she is pregnant because that is only going to make the situation worse. She is working on it if she is trying to stay sober when driving. She might just be taking it one step at a time. If you want to help, next time you are over and you see her drinking let her have one glass then take her cup away and give her water and tell her you are trying to help her quit drinking alcohol. She may not like you but when you leave the house take everything but one or two bottles/cans of alcohol out with you and tell her you will give her the cans back so that she can only drink one or two glasses at a time. She may not like it but if you truly want to help and she truly wants to quit she will thank you. Another thing you can do is go shopping for groceries for/with her so you can help steer her away from the alcohol. There are other things but if you keep bothering her she may hate you in the end but if it helps her quit then you are doing a good thing. The best thing you can do is help check her into a rehab unit and take her there when she has appointments to make sure she goes. You need to do this with her permission though. GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-17 11:18:15 · answer #2 · answered by JEB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well
if your friend is pregnant it really could hurt the baby so she should stop or maybe just one small drink a day
if she can stop and does when she has too, and doesn't drink much if she is driving, that is a good start for her.
another DWI and she would lose her lisence (can't spell that word)
anyway, its really nice to be concerned, if you are a very close friend who spends time with her, maybe just tell her how much you care, it might help
2006-12-17 10:55:27 · answer #3 · answered by kurticus1024 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep plugging away at her. It is not going to be a problem that is going to go away on it's own, for sure. she may not like you in the end, but you could be part of something that could set her up to live a normal life. Good luck to you and your friend.
2006-12-17 10:54:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your friend is doing what they want .that is her right and you should myob.if you dont like it so much that you think you need to say something be assured she already nos what you want to say and does not wish to hear it .many times in life we well find our friends in bad shape they must pull them selves out of the mud you well not help by pushing your idies on her .ba a friend be there when she falls that is what she needs not a bunch of advice she wont take
2006-12-17 11:35:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Until she can take ownership of her alcoholism, there is nothing in the world that yourcaring will do for her. Continue to tell her you care and you are concerned. It's very unfortunate that she continues to make these choices, but you can't fix them, and you can't fix her.
2006-12-17 10:59:57 · answer #6 · answered by knowitall 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like her problems go way deeper than her drinking. I would recommend counseling.
2006-12-17 10:52:41 · answer #7 · answered by Marj 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
gee, a stripper with a drinking problem. can you say low self esteem. good luck. personally, i would find a new friend.
2006-12-17 10:53:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
she needs excuses because she is an alcoholic...
you CANT fix her, she has to want to get sober... till then all you can do is sit and watch
sorry
2006-12-17 10:56:33 · answer #9 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave her. There are relatives to take care.
2006-12-17 10:54:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋