What can we do to stop the commercial nature of Christmas for our children?

Question

While picking my children up from school, two aides put them in our car. One classroom aide said "have a wonderful holiday hope you get a ton of presents for Christmas!!" I know she had the best of intentions for the children but I got angry. I want my children to celebrate the birth of Christ and spirit of giving. I want them to realize that presents aren't the only reason why we have Christmas. Was I wrong to feel angry about the "tons of presents"? My family is struggling financially right now so any present the kids get right now is taking away from paying bills and buying food for my family. I got them presents but who's to say "tons" is what they need or should have. Why isn't two or three presents okay anymore? Why do we have to indulge our children to their self destruction? Okay I guess I have asked more like 5 questions but what do you think?

Answer 1

Oy....

I think it was an inappropriate thing to say, particularly since a lot of parents want to teach their children not to see Christmas as the one time of the year when they can be greedy and get away with it. Not to mention, a lot of people are financially struggling, and it's inappropriate for their teacher to suggest to them that they should expect "lots of presents".

I would talk to the teacher, but be as non-confrontational as you can. After all, she most likely didn't say it out of anything other than playfulness and affection for your kids. I believe (and it sounds like you do, too) that her mistake was one of ignorance or thoughtlessness, not malicious.

When you talk to her, let her know that you don't think she did it out of anything but affection for your kids, but that you try to teach your children that Christmas is not about presents, and since your family is financially struggling, hoping for "lots of presents" is unrealistic and they could end up disappointed.

I have several friends (we're Christians) who have a three-present rule, since they can easily justify it to their children: Jesus got three presents, and so you get three presents. I thought it was genius. Since the kids have a REASON why there are fewer presents, they can accept it better.

To help with the commercialism, keep your kids away from the tv as much as possible. Teach them how to give to others (particularly to those who CAN'T give them something in return... take them to a nursing home, have them help with a toy/coat/food drive, let them sponsor a kid on an Angel Tree). Don't put much emphasis on the gift aspect of Christmas. Teach them how to accept gifts gracefully.

Happy holidays!

Answer 2

I concur on most points with the others. But they seem to have missed the most important point. Just as the saying goes, "Jesus is the reason for the season." By not only telling them, but by openly demonstrating by deeds the truth about Christmas, they will come to understand that commercialization is an economic boon for buisness. This may take years depending on the age and maturity of the child.

If at all possible, have the children participate in a gift giving program through your chuch or the Marines Toys for Tots. Or let them donate non-perishable food to a soup kitchen etc. Anything will show them how they can help others. No act is too small.

Have a Blessed Christmas. Don't worry about the children. If you as a parent are concerned enough even ask this question, you are doing right by your children.

Answer 3

You, personally, can't stop it! You can, however, stop it in your home. We teach our children that Santa only fills the stockings in our home. They also know the real meaning of Christmas and have been raised in church, so that helps with the "wanting" side of things. We don't go overboard with presents either, or we'd not be able to pay our normal bills. We keep Christmas simple and that's hard to do in these times. Even at church, you'll have those people that ask your kids how much Santa brought them. I cringe each time I hear that. It's gotten to be a competition to see who can get the most "stuff". And, it's just that---"STUFF". Most of it gets broken, etc. in a month or so. You just have to focus your family on what you believe and let the other things fall to the side.
Have a very Merry Christmas and a blessed New Year! Happy B-Day Jesus!! :)

Answer 4

Congratulations on teaching your children the real reason for Christmas. Why not take them to the local Manger/Creche and kneel before the Christ Child.
I'm glad you got angry at the teacher for that comment. Perhaps she doesn't know the true reason of Christmas.
Next year, I think what I'll do is send a family (3rd world country) an animal. I rec'd this catalogue from World Vision where by buying an animal, they are the ones that benefit in the long run.
Children have far too much and parents who surrender by giving into their every whim/desire are not doing them any favours.
The true meaning of Christmas sure has gone by the wayside.

Answer 5

I totally agree with you and it IS a problem. We have been reading stories to our children, both the commercial Santa type and the birth of Christ. I am happy to say that we have actually found some books where Santa has only brought ONE gift to the children...that gave us an opportunity explore that with our children. On the flip side, the christian Christmas books have been the opportunity to explore the giving of Christmas. It's a tough balance, especially with the younger children. I believe it's up to us as parents who direct the way of Christmas for our kids. We easily can get caught up on the commercial stuff, and I must admit, we have too in the past. Our kids have so much that they already take for granted and I agree with you, a few presents is plenty. Maybe we should talk to the kids, and get them to sort thru their toys and pass on what they really dont play with anymore to other children who dont have much at all? You've given me food for thought. Have a Merry Christmas!

Answer 6

The tons of presents thing makes me angry too. But all we can do is focus on the reason for the season, Jesus, and continue to teach our children the same. The world will always be materialistic; all we can do is give our children a strong foundation in which to start. Try reading them the story of Mary & Joseph at Christmas, my children loved it and it focused their attention on what the day was about.

Answer 7

The teacher shouldn't have mentioned getting "tons of presents" because of the reasons you mentioned. I'm sure what you teach your children about the holiday will be a big part in how they celebrate for now and years to come. Teach them it's not about what you get, but about Jesus and family and doing for others.

And you can thank groups like AU for taking "Christ" out of Christmas. I guess they don't see it, but they are going AGAINST the First Amendment when they try NOT to allow people to celebrate and worship in their own way. It says in reference to religion "prohibiting the free exercise thereof". There is NOTHING in the Constitution mentioning "separation of church and state"! The heck with being politically correct, that's not a law either!

Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Answer 8

I agree with you. What we have always done is make it a big birthday party for Jesus complete with cake and candles. On his behalf the kids buy a gift for some one less fortunate than themselves. Although they believe in Santa they also know that Santa works for Jesus, that's how he can do the things that he does.
Each year as they get older they learn a bit more about the true spirit of SantaClause.
It has worked well for us, an example is my 7 yr. olds wish list this year.
He asked Santa to bring hin one box of cars and then take all the other gifts that he would recieve and sell them, then buy food for all the families that have less. Because he knows that there are kids that don't have enough to eat and that is more important to him than getting toys.
P.S Santa will and has been giving Food to the area food banks, but he will also deliver a bit more than 1 box of cars to my son.

Answer 9

I don't think that the teacher meant " ton of presents" she was just trying to be nice. I wouldn't have gotten angry. To me two or three presents is just fine. My child is 7 and I have never gotten him a ton of presents. He is happy with what he gets. Yours should be too. It is wonderful for them to know the true meaning of christmas. My son got baptised a few months ago. It was his choice and I am very proud of him. He is excited about christmas and celebrating the true meaning of christmas.

Answer 10

I think you're right to feel that way. I completely agree. Concentrate on the giving this year instead of the getting--have the kids donate some of their toys to Toys for Tots, or volunteer at a community Christmas dinner, food bank or homeless shelter so that the kids can learn to appreciate what they have.