me and my husband have been married almost 2 years now, and we have a 6 mos old...he is a fair amount older than me, and I just want to know what your opinion is on this last thing that happened...It's probably biased....being the wife and all.....so just read it k??
We had our daughter in June and I was the hormonal type that hated sex while were were expecting, and we didn't have sex for the last 3 months of my pregnancy at least...and then we didn't have it for the 8 wks of healing afterwards,,,and then i just didn't want to and we just went a 2 mos span without having it for no reason at all...and he comes up to me and says he feels rejected, the problem with that is, that he's been in the hospital, for the last month and then i went back to work full time, and put my kid in daycare....and he says he feels rejected how do I talk about that with him, and how do I get past this no sex thing I could care less about having sex again in my life, well that's how it feels...So help pls
2006-12-16 12:44:09 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
it seems like i'm so far apart from him already, that i don't even want to branch across, and some stuff happend when i was a kid, and it just comes up when i have sex....so i dont like it any more but i used to so what could be wrong....i dont want to loose my marriage but i dont feel like being touched and cuddled and everything....almost maskes me sick...j/k...just want to be left alone
2006-12-16 12:54:05 · update #1
You said some stuff happened when you were a kid and it comes up when you have sex? This could be a key factor here. It is common where the has been some sexual abuse in the past for a victim to block it out, then after having a child those scars are brought out to the surface again. It's something to do with the hormonal changes.
Don't get discouraged
Don't give up
Upon further discussion of your question my husband offers you this additional advice. We have had 3 children and he has had to watch me closely for Post partum depression.
This is not an uncommon problem. Book an appointment with your doctor. I don't want to alarm you but something to seriously consider is the posibility of postpartum depression. Loss of interest in sex is one of the major symptoms. It is better to be safe than sorry. Postpartum depression shows up in many forms, not just feelings towards the baby but also your spouse.
Do talk to your husband, open up and tell him everything!
Do see your doctor
Do see a councellor
Good luck.
2006-12-16 14:00:00 · answer #1 · answered by Cannuck 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to discuss your hormone changes with a doctor. Sounds like your estrogen is high and your testosterone is low.
Marital counseling could help as well, since feelings are already hurt and confused.
Take the baby to a sitter and spend alone time together, cuddling and getting re-acquainted with one another physically.
What you are going through is not uncommon after a pregnancy and birth. But you do need to work through it together, before it breaks up your marriage. There is help for you. See the doc and see a therapist.
Best Wishes,
Sue
2006-12-16 12:49:25 · answer #2 · answered by newbiegranny 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im now not the only to quite get concerned in marital affairs however the quite massive no no is him yelling in entrance of the children. Because they would develop as much as be competitive and yell at you as their mom or in the future their possess youngsters. The father is whom so much youngsters be trained the right way to deal w/ others socially. They would have difficulty wherever from college to dwelling. Girl, if he does not such as you anyone else will. Its now not valued at it. Tell him get support or your out. Divorce isn't a sin. Another guy's trash is a different guy's treasure. Take it from a character whose mom was once abused as a bit of lady. I would don't forget again as a long way a 4yrs historic how he use to regard my mom. And i had a few problems inside that i ha dto deal w/ on the grounds that of that i vowed that i could not ever ever positioned my youngsters by way of whatever like that and wager what their dad attempted to do the equal factor as my dad, Notic ei stated attempted, lady i left him so speedy he didnt recognise i used to be long past. Whom ever i meet i allow them to recognise my youngsters come 1st. If you dont love my youngsters youngster! you cant potentially love me! I dont play that! That was once 8yrs in the past. And im fortunately with anyone else, who im engaged to and love my youngsters. He spends time w/ them instructing them specific languages and existence courses. ANd did i omit to say he is a instructor! Good good fortune! Remember handle the infants and also you, first earlier than any guy, husband or now not!
2016-09-03 15:06:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pregnancy changes things..
changes hormones
Changes energy
changes interest
changes schedules
changes lifestyle
like I said...everything. That being said... someone has to make allowances... you just have to make time for each other and for sex... the baby can't consume your every fiber. Yes he is right to feel rejected...it's normal...
But unless you want to alienate him into an affair or a failed marriage...sit talk and figure it out... and sweetie...just give the guy a little once in a while.
And PS, his age has nothing to do with it. he's a man... and wants attention... but he also neds to be sensitive to you as well. talk talk talk
2006-12-16 12:51:43 · answer #4 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it takes two to tango. all i have to say is you/ya'll got yourselves in this mess, now it's time for some heart to heart talk. men tend to rely more on sex in a marriage, where as women want more romance. if your hormonal problems persist, go to your doctor for some help and possible treatment.
2006-12-16 12:55:38 · answer #5 · answered by CruelChick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋