My husband has been acting weird for the past 4 years when he gets home he avoids me and the kids. He either lays around the house or on the computer. I also work and going back to school, the only time he talks to me is when he has something nagitve to say. We both have married once before and I have a child from the first married my husband is nagitve toward me son and me. when He is home on the weekends he either leaves all of the time or refuses to do things with me and the kids. I have tried to talk with him but he puts his head phones on or turns the tv up so he cant hear me. Most of his music he listens to is either about missing the past or missing a ex girlfriend. I have had trust issues with him in the past........I am not sure if he ever cheated but I had evidence example going up town to get the newspaper but gone for hours came back sweaty with bottons torn off. When we go out in public he goes his seprate why and I cant find him when its time to check out.
2006-12-16 12:38:04 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
seems like he's getting beat up. bottoms torn off.
chin
2006-12-16 12:40:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If he doens't desire to be with then you definitely i'm particularly sorry yet there's no longer something you're able to do approximately it. If he's along with his mothers and fathers by using fact they have come into some funds and he has taken care of you like this, what does that truly say approximately him as a guy or woman. Take some convenience in the very incontrovertible fact which you're a extra useful guy or woman. i understand you in all probability won't care on the 2d yet sometime you will. you need to continually document for divorce. which will the two open his eyes to the very fact he's dropping you, or he won't care. Whichever it particularly is a minimum of you have got the respond. The discomfort with be with you for a whilst and it will take time to recover from this, yet you will. you will grow to be extra advantageous and start to stay your life back.
2016-10-15 02:18:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. If you've had any kind of evidence of him cheating, and can't get an answer out of him, go get an STD panel done. You have kids and need to be there for them. {I wouldn't necessarily count the music as evidence, though - my dad listens to country, and about every other song is about missing the past and old girlfriends. Some music's just like that.}
2. Get to a marriage therapist. If he won't go with you, go by yourself. If you can't afford a licensed marriage therapist, find a pastor or free counseling service. Also perhaps look for a "healing after divorce" type of group, get the pair of you to that if you can, as it would be a dual purpose: 1) to remind you both of how painful divorce is and 2) to heal from previous issues that may still be unresolved.
3. If the therapy doesn't help, you need to start getting your life in order. If it means another divorce, it may just have to mean another divorce. Your responsibility is 1) to provide good, stable home & love for your children and 2)to provide only loving, stable relationships for yourself.
2006-12-16 12:48:14 · answer #3 · answered by Fed_UP_with_work. 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say it dear,but it sounds like your husband is cheating. Avoiding you, saying he is getting ONE simple thing and being gone are tell tale signs of his infedelity. If you can afford it,hire a private investigator,and seek out evidence,you can always use this evidence once you go for a divorce,if that will be the choice.
Don't deal with his attitude and his lack of interest in you and the family,marriage is supposed to be open to thoughts,doubts,and happiness. Don't let him ignoring you like a child over power the situation. Be frank,bold and don't back down. This is your happiness,your future,and could possibly be your health if he is sleepign with multiple women and you.
2006-12-16 12:43:19 · answer #4 · answered by Ellie 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear about this. There is no excuse for his behavior. There is also no sense in you being in a situation that you're miserable in. It's not fair to you or your kids. I would think that it would be better for you to leave him. It would be safer also, that way you know you're not going to get a sexually transmitted disease...should he break down and give you some sex. I feel in the long run you'll be much more happier without him. Maybe you'll find love again, who knows? I only wish you the best of luck.
2006-12-16 13:26:48 · answer #5 · answered by cajunrescuemedic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships are like magnets....the less you care, the more he will care...and i swear by this. next time he ignores you...you ignore him back. Live your life and be the interesting intelligent beautiful lady he first fell in love with...it seems like youve lost yourself, and are living for him now... do your own thing and the sparks will come back. Oh, and if he doesn't show affection, don't give him affection either. He will respond to the lack of contact much more then you throwing yourself at him.. cuz honestly, if his problem with you had to do with not enough sex, he would be more affectionate, not less affectionate...you see what i'm saying? good luck...don't lose who you are....be sexy and let him beg for you! And go out more....spend less time with him. I promise this will work.
2006-12-16 13:00:24 · answer #6 · answered by missamerica 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well it sounds to me like he just dont want to be bothered. I broke up with my boyfriend of six years 3 months ago and i ve never been so happy. I used to find myself ignoring him or not wanting to be home when he was around. I felt this way because he never remembered my birthday or ever took me out so what I am trying to say is there has to be a reason he is doing this to you and it has to be because he is not happy and is probably scared to hurt your feelings but you need to talk to him and ask him if hes happy. If you dont nothing will ever change or get better and you will wind up regreting it. Its better to be by yourself then unhappy and sometimes men make us feel like we arent good enough and thats sucks and u shouldnt put up with it hope this was helpfull.
2006-12-16 12:48:28 · answer #7 · answered by snuggle bear 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is not happy where he is at, he may be listening to this kind of music, because he is cheating or has cheated, and is still in love with her. maybe he isn't sure about the girl yet, and feels anxious, and unsure. but he definitely doesn't have his mind on u and your kids. sounds as if he would rather be somewhere else, sounds as if he is in love with another or the relationship didn't work out and he is thinking about her. time to get out of it, or seek counseling, but he doesn't sound as if he would go for it. life is too short to spend it with someone who doesn't love or respect u. his heart just isn't with you, and it shows by his actions.
2006-12-16 12:46:04 · answer #8 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well look sweetie...you may need to just flat out ask him what he wants. ask him when he is away from anything that will distract him. the problem is that its not fair to you or the kids. you need to know where your life stands. its not fair for you to have to continue wondering if you are going to stay married. honestly, it sounds like he's cheating. its easy to not focus on what you have at home if you have outside distractions. at this point he doesnt care what goes on at home because he's not caring about home right now.(if he's cheating) you need to ask him if he want to stay together or go your separate ways. if this has been going for 4 yrs...enough is enough! how has your sex life been? if its second to none..then i would think even more so that he is cheating. when and if you ask him if he wants out, you must be prepared for his answer because he just might say yes. but if he says yes then you must know that this is best for you and the kids. again its not fair for you to be living a life with someone that is absent from your life! you are actually separated already. and as for him speaking negatively to you, thats one thing if you want to deal with it but for him to speak that way about your son is not acceptable! your son has to deal with it because you are leaving him in this situation. trust me as he get older, he will realize that its because of you that he is even there. you better hope he doesnt grow to resent you for it. stop asking him to be involved with you and the kids...go on with your life without him, even if you are still together. if you keep sweating him about him and his time, he will continue to do what he do. no matter how you say it, he will look at it like you are nagging him. you've gotta change your reactions for him to notice that something is different. see, once you pull back some, he might open his eyes. if he say that he doesnt want out then let him know that you cant and wont go on like this and if you are going to be together, things must change!
2006-12-16 13:05:33 · answer #9 · answered by huneygrl1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is some mysterious behavior, From reading this, I would guess that he is seeing his ex-wife or a new girlfriend, but he doesn't want to tell you or lie to you, because he doesn't want to hurt you. Maybe you could look on his cell and she if there are any "unknown" numbers, and call them, I'm not an expert tho. Good Luck with your husband! ;)
2006-12-16 12:43:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try revitalizing your sex-life with something new and exciting…
Often people in marriages get "bored" because their brain stops responding as well to the constant release of certain chemicals like PEA that are associated with love.
Trying something new will certainly fight this "boredom"
2006-12-16 12:45:05 · answer #11 · answered by Carp Face 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋