I have a 24-year old daughter - she has been dating a guy his age who has had a son with another girl when he was 19. My daughter cannot seem to get over this guy. I would like for her to finish college first. I have been supporting her all this time. She just finished her 2-yr associate degree after 6 years. She is working part-time as a waitress, but does not seem to be motivated at all. I pay her rent, car inssurance, etc., she pays for food. What should I do?
2006-12-16 10:58:32 · 8 answers · asked by Sams C 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
talk to her. not about the guy - that's up to her. talk to her and agree how long you will support her, what you expect from her etc.
xxx
2006-12-16 11:02:13 · answer #1 · answered by aria 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems that you have prevented your daughter from experiencing the responsibilities of life. 6 years for an associate's degree, you pay her rent, etc. Are you serious?
You need to give her a specific amount of time and then stop all the support. Let the reality of life catch up with her. Or hope she marries the guy so you can support both of them and the boy.
2006-12-16 11:03:41 · answer #2 · answered by jack w 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cut the umbilical cord! she's 24 yrs old...time for her to grow up and be an adult complete with adult responsibilities...i know u want to protect ur child from any sort of harm...but u have to let her make her own mistakes so she will learn from them...stop paying for all of her responsibilities...she is taking it for granted...i don't mean to come across as harsh...but i know what that is like...no i'm not a parent...i actually was like ur daughter...my parents did all that u do for ur daughter until i was 25...but when they stopped...i felt how could they do it to me...but after a while i was thankful that they did...i became independent...and truly appreciated the value of a dollar since it was "my" money being spent...that said...start treating her like an adult and she will be forced to take charge of her own life...as for the boyfriend...there is not much u can do about that...this is one lesson she will have to learn the hard way...my advice is to be there and support her but just not financially...sorry this is such a long response...hope this helps...gud luck!
2006-12-16 11:11:35 · answer #3 · answered by Retarded Genius 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs a life of her own! Stop supporting her. She is 24 years old. That is too old to depend on her mother for everything and especially, for monetary support. She has to learn to live on her own and to make her own decisions. You have to stop making decisions for her. Yes, there will be a lot of tears on both sides and a lot of times where she will beg to come home because she thinks she just can't make it on her own. Don't take her back, she has to learn to make it on her own. Let her grow up. There will be many mistakes, but that is the only way she will ever learn - by her own mistakes. Good luck to the both of you. Remember - be strong!
2006-12-16 11:53:27 · answer #4 · answered by country girl 006 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am twenty four and my Dad was helping me like you are helping her, I graduate college this year and he vut me off, he is still there when I am SOL but I also have a four year old son and its to help him not me. I work full time and go to school full time and raise my son full time. Your daughter needs to grow up and take care of herself. 24 is pretty old, cut the strings and make her do things for herself, if not you are going to be broke and end up on Dr. Phil. If you do not help her she has no choice than to help herself.
2006-12-16 11:04:07 · answer #5 · answered by dontknow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you shouldnt be paying her rent, insurance or anything else. shes going to get married one day and are u ganna be supporting her family to? u deserve your own life. sit her down and explain that if she doesnt like her job, to get another one then quite as a waitress. about the guy, well he doesnt sound like a good person to date, but let her date him, shell get hurt and gain alot of life experience and on her pwn, so it will make her really happy
2006-12-16 11:13:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is 24. She should be paying her share of everything. wow 6 yrs for a 2 yr. degree? well.....at least she got one I guess
2006-12-16 11:02:09 · answer #7 · answered by maww50 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, I think at 24 years old, you cannot manipulate, or have a strong influence on her as you did when she was 19 and under...I think you are doing the imposible as a parent and you should talk to her.
2006-12-16 11:01:51 · answer #8 · answered by (^_^) CHiccaaqui(^_^) 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋