If someone was using foul language around children, would you intervene?

Question

I was told off and threatened with a beating recently for speaking up at a social occasion because a man was berating his wife in front of his children using every shocking word you can imagine.

Answer 1

It would depend on the situaiton, as well as how well I knew the person. If I was with my nephew in public, and a guy was letting loose with an "F" bombardment, then I would try to get my nephew away from the situation. If I was at a party, then yes, I would say something, even if I did not know the person very well.

This situation you mention actually tarnished a friendship for me a few years back. My wife and I were over to a couple's house one Saturday afternoon. They were watching a couple of young boys over the weekend. The kids were in the living room while the football game was on, and this other guy would let loose with the worst language, as well as throw things, whenever things did not go the way of his college team (it is the team I root for too, I won't say what school). I finally told him there were kids present, and to cool it, and he got bent out of shape because, "After all, it was his house." I reminded him that I never say anything to him about it when its just him and me in the living room, but he did have a responsiblity to be an example in front of the boys (Especially since he is a deacon in his church). The wife and I don't get invited over to their house for football anymore because of it. I normally don't feel its my place to tell someone how to act in their own home, but, when it comes to impressionable children, I will say something if its getting out of hand.

Answer 2

In that case, I might intervene, if only because the father (the jerk) was showing disrespect for his wife in front of their children, which if nothing else, shows a bad example and gives the kids the idea this sort of stupidity is acceptable. As far as using "foul" language around kids: they're just words, and words rarely hurt anyone. Besides, they'll hear worse than that in the schoolyard. We use foul language for shock value and to make a point; since everyone uses them they're beginning to be less shocking, which may or may not be a good thing. However, back to the real problem: That father should have been taken aside and reminded to treat his wife better, especially in public and in front of his children. But I kind of doubt a fool like that would listen.

Answer 3

Did anybody read the details of the question?
It kind of a trick question, and trom the replies, I don't think that everyone did.
Oops!
I see that it pertinent details were added almost an hour after the question was asked. You can almost tell it by the sudden change in answers.
Oh well, here's my answer.
-------------
F**k no!

It's their business. It's also freedom of speech.

I hate to break it to you, but if they did it in public, there is a chance they're doing it at home too. And, I'd hazard a guess that their children have already heard those words before.
What exactly were you saving their children from?

If you want to enforce your morals upon other people, you may one day get the beating you were threatened with.
As long as they were not doing anything illegal, I couldn't say who would end up in worse shape. Because they would probably both say that you started it.

Cops know that domestic disputes are the most dangerous calls to answer, have broken up fights, and then have gotten shot by the injured party when they were taking away the "bad buy".

My daddy said "Engage brain before operating mouth."

Answer 4

If it was MY child, I would feel ok to politely ask the person to tone down the language. Yelling and screaming at them, however, would set no better an example. As a parent, it is my right to defend my child. However, it also depends on the situation. If a parent has taken their child to a location that is clearly not suitable for children, then they have no right to ask people to behave in a manner suitable for children. But at a McDonald's, I have asked a group of teenagers to stop dropping the F-bomb. I can't force anyone to stop, but I've found that a polite request usually does it.

Answer 5

From retail, I've experienced many ghetto-mouthed, rude, uneducated people. Customers would wait in line and this mom (who would always be without the father....I just realized that), the kids wouldn't be doing anything really bad, and she would straight up curse the hell out of them, screaming, grabbing them, yanking their arm, and smacking them in the face in front of everyone saying every name under the sun. Of course you know there is gonna be someone who is anti-child abuse (which I totally respect them and I admire how they have the courage to do this), they would step out of line, go up to the mother and say not to hit them because that's not how you discipline children. Then you know instead of apologizing, the ghetto rude mom would curse right back at the person threatening to kick their ***, mind their own business and to shut up. That in return make the person argue with her, and you know the mom would go even more of a loud mouth obnoxious whore setting a totally wrong example to her children. Great going, dead beat mom. Then you wonder why some people grow up without any manners and education.

Answer 6

What did you think you were gonna accomplish by telling this guy to watch his language around his children? I mean come on, if this guy is swearing like this around them in public, I am sure it isn't the first or last time they are gonna hear it from him. You might prevent it happening one time, which is gonna accomplish nothing and could start a fight. As you state it almost did. Would you rather the child hear English slang used in a bad way or witness two grown men participating in violence by fighting one another? I personally think you and others like you should just stay out of it, because like I stated earlier it will accomplish nothing or make it worse. If you feel you must do something call child services and report him. At least that way, if there is another situation with him and his children, they will have this report to fall back on as more evidence. If it happens around your children, I think the right thing to do would point the fellow out to your child and explain what he is doing wrong (meaning the swearing) and try to explain to them why they shouldn't do it. Then move you and your child out of range of the foul language. Like it or not your child is likely gonna hear worse from their friends at school. All you can do is try to teach them that it is wrong and hope they listen to you.

Answer 7

I had a similar experience in a family restaurant where a woman was speaking on a cell phone using every imaginable 4 letter word at the top of her lungs. I was 2 tables away and had my 2 year old daughter with us. I walked over and kneeled down and asked her to please be aware of her surroundings and please refrain from using those words so loudly. She complained to the manager even more loudly. We were the ones who had to leave because she threw such a fit. What is wrong with that picture.

Answer 8

Yes, but I would do it tactfully, and with common sense. For example, if the person was totally drunk, I might handle it by being their best buddy and asking them to go for a walk and get them outta there. If they are using language because they are really angry, I would attempt to calm them down in any way possible, so that the language would stop. But, if they are just being vulgar with no regard for the kids, I would just say "yo, dude, chill out there are kids here, okay? If that doesn't work, I'd tell them that right now isn't a good time for a visit, and get rid of them. If they got mad about it, tough, because obviously they don't respect you at all, or they would respect your request, esspecially one as simple as that. Come on, they're kids - its the responsibility of every single person that comes in contact with a child to at least be appropriate. Its not too much to ask.

Answer 9

Yes I would and I have. I would try to be polite but if they continued to do so I would tell them how immature and disrespectful they were. This I have also done. Family, friends, or strangers it doesn't matter because I want my child to grow up with pure thoughts and not use disgusting language to get her point across. It hurts me so bad to see children curse in front of their parents and the parents act as though it's nothing. I want my child to respect me more than that and to also respect herself more than that.

Answer 10

Ha, I asked a friend to watch his mouth around my son when he was at an impressionable age. Later the same day forgot and when my son parroted back my "French" my buddy had fun getting on my case. If you try this with other people I would suggest doing it gently, and expect an indignant response, because they wouldn't be doing it if they were very responsible.